Flaut-it

@Irenmarie1 @DuchessofGeeks She’s supposed to be blood splatter

@DuchessofGeeks Her stylist hates her, a lot! She looks like a blood splatter, and the designer was trying to cover her face with feathers. You can just tell them to shove it up their arses you know. Walk out, go find something you like.

This is Lena Dunham. I thought for a while on something nice to say. All I have is It’s a pretty color. What in the heck made her think that feathered mess was a good idea?

@ProletariatRis1 My brain fog went away, thank goodness.

So.. this is my first time with COVID-19. I managed to avoid it for 6 years of this pandemic... I'm definitely feeling that "brain fog" everyone was talking about. I heard this doesn't ever go away. Please tell me that's not true. I feel STONED and I haven't vaped THC in 10 days.

@JustAMIMom Some people get really territorial - ask first

Think I’m going to mow my neighbors yard. Single mom struggling getting her mower working for the first time of the season. Do it? Don’t do it it’s a breach of privacy?

@trouble_man90 My friend’s parents marched with MLK

My dad was in the first group of Black students to integrate the high school that I graduated from.

@USSGoodGirl Word

Whenever I hear about a new disease I look it up to see if I have the symptoms, but as soon as I get to “unexplained weight loss” I know I’m safe.

@JBPritzker @bluebirdpoopies Jams

They were in at the time, I swear!

@_Ava_VT Sure

SERIOUS QUESTION: If somebody handed you $800,000 and said it's because you're ugly, would you accept it?

@DollyParton Take care of yourself! ❤️

Thank you for standing by me and showing me so much love and support over the past year. I’ve still got some healing to do, but I am on my way! See you soon. 💖 🦋

@ramzpaul @KwikWarren We’re all going downhill! Perfect symbolism!

@Si_Ro_Nin @cyangmou Then you should tell them specifically that- I was in the shut down camp until just now. (I had no idea that it had changed.)

@cyangmou Open Control Panel, select Power Options, select currently unavailable options, disable Fast Startup. Then shut down won't snapshot/restore the system state. I wish I could get people to not shutdown and power back on when I tell them to restart.

I just learned that Windows switched around crucial functions of "shut down" & "restart" (╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻ If you shut down your whole RAM is saved like a quickstart snapshot... So actually your RAM never gets cleaned if you don't specifically restart🤦‍♂️ I RESTARTED and WOW

@AngryCitizenxx Oh owwwwwwwwwwwwww but alcohol won’t help

I burned about 85% of my foot while making homemade fries yesterday. It boiled over. The desire to drink the pain away... is very present.

@cjnitelife @Suzierizzo1 Sugar can have a function- it can be nutrition

@Suzierizzo1 They have sugar free Jello jackass

He’s seriously out of his mind because Jello is a food that’s easy to digest,hydrating & perfect for post op surgery patients in recovery because their throats are usually dry & sore & Jello is soothing to them.The packages are extremely small too.

@GeriPerna I had a Poor Pitiful Pearl. My parents thought she was funny.

Back in the late 50s, there was a doll called Poor Pitiful Pearl. While Barbie was selling glamour, fashion, and perfection, Pearl was the complete opposite. She came ragged, sad-eyed, and dressed like life had beat her up a bit. But she also came with a nicer outfit, so you could “rescue” her and make her pretty again. She was created by William Steig, the same guy who later created Shrek. The doll was not a great seller because parents found her depressing....no kidding!😳

@SaraForTexLege Bug spray with DEET is the only thing that works for me (I’m a mosquito magnet)

Alright, y’all. I need reqs. It’s officially scratching season and the THREE citronella candles I have on my back porch aren’t cutting it. Do mosquitoes love citronella now? Shoot me your best and most trusted outdoor repellent products - because I am NOT messing around this summer.

@benedictsred Cross legged

Really stuck because I don’t want to be racist but I refuse to say crisscross applesauce

@YvonneMeidling1 @_nomadic_soul 🤣🤣🤣

@_nomadic_soul I can understand a mother, but why would a wife have more domestic work. The jobs are being shared by two now.

Wait, why is it controversial to say a wife and mother has more domestic work than a single woman?

@GregWasik @jacobbogage @AmericanAir Well yes, but that’s so stupid

@jacobbogage @AmericanAir might have been they just missed the cutoff to be on the plane and standbys were the accommodated. Doesn't matter if the door is open and plane still there.

I just watched the weirdest thing, @AmericanAir. In Miami, two women arrived for their flight to Boston with plenty of time to spare. They showed the gate agent their boarding pass. The agent bizarrely said the flight was closed, then seated standby passengers. What on earth?

@saniyafatma1278 I think it looks great

Said yes to consignment wedding dress What does Reddit think about this dress? I love it for the price, but does it look too casual? Please keep in mind that the corset isn’t laced all the way, so my chest would look a lot better if done so. #wedding #dresses #fblifestyle

@realpeteyb123 B

Took the triplets to a desolate beach for their birthday. Had them build rock people. Promised them we will go to Internet to choose who made the best rock person. Drop a comment: Kid A Kid B Kid C Winner gets to plan itinerary tomorrow.

Reminder that if you took medication to end pregnancy and need to seek medical attention for any reason, you do NOT need to say you voluntarily ended it! You can just say you think you’re having a miscarriage! The treatment is the same!!