Crisp Beer

@skdh If they get this wrong, it could be the greatest scientific mistake in history

@NoticerNews Those gurus get you every time, gotta be careful

An Indian immigrant used a fake certificate to claim she was qualified to work as a nurse in Australia, and then lied in court and claimed she was the victim. Harpreet Kaur claimed she was scammed by a "guru" and didn't know her documents were false. noticer.news/fake-indian-nu…

@Ken_LoveTW Trump had his bluff called

This is Trump's Art of the Deal in action. By putting maximum pain on the table with a 48-hour ultimatum threatening Iran’s energy backbone, then strategically pausing for five days after “productive” talks, Trump is forcing the Iranian regime to choose between compromise and collapse. Iranian society is already under immense pressure. People are deeply dissatisfied with years of sanctions and conflict. If the country experiences nationwide blackouts and infrastructure collapse, daily life would become unsustainable. At present, many Iranians may resent the regime but remain silent out of fear, as the government still holds coercive power. As long as life remains barely tolerable, people hesitate to rebel. If key power stations are destroyed, recovery would be slow or even impossible, leading to long-term, irreversible consequences. This would be a fatal blow to the regime’s foundation. Why? Because electricity is the backbone of modern society. Faced with hunger and survival, people will overcome fear and rise up. Washington isn’t rushing into another Middle East war. It’s testing whether effective diplomacy can deliver results faster and cheaper. If talks fail, the threat remains credible. If they succeed, Trump walks away with a strategic win with minimal cost.

@WhiteRabbitIA Looks like barter is back on the menu boys!

🚨 Australia-Singapore fuel deal announced today. Agreement: • Australia supplies Singapore with LNG • Singapore supplies Australia with diesel Significance: • Singapore currently supplies 41% of Australia’s petrol • Deal uses LNG leverage strategy to secure priority access But: • Energy Minister Bowen admits 6 tankers bound for Australia already cancelled/postponed • Singapore refineries need Hormuz crude oil to make diesel • This secures priority, not additional supply It’s damage control, not a solution.

@AlboMP @LawrenceWongST Have you tried asking Iran, they are still delivering the goods

We’re working to secure the fuel Australia needs with our international partners and longstanding friends. Today, Prime Minister @LawrenceWongST of Singapore and I agreed to support the flow of essentials goods including petroleum oils, such as diesel, and liquified natural gas between our two countries. We'll keep working closely as we deal with the impacts of the conflict in the Middle East.

@AvidCommentator Tackling*

@AvidCommentator Finally you're taking the big issues

Video game codes that come in physical boxes instead of a disk or cartridge are godless communism and must for the sake of humanity be destroyed.

@REMASCULATE A significant proportion of the population looked at a yellow butter car, and thought, gee wizz, that's the car for me.

What’s the first thing you notice?

@strxwmxn Dude...were you born yesterday? Do you know what's been happening the last 25 years? Non stop flat footedness, that's what!

The US and Israel have each run countless simulations gaming out every single scenario, every option, and every potential reaction to every option. The idea that the Allied Powers would be caught flat-footed because the war is longer than 20 days is — to borrow a term from game theory — fucking retarded.

@CallMeKulubya A large part of that 80% is not exported globally. I suggest that the strait shutdown actually represents greater than 20 % of global exports... therefore, importing nations are up shit creek without a paddle

If Iran has the strait of Hormuz claimed to control about 20% of the World’s Oil and Gas , why don’t the world concentrate on the 80% they have no control about. I really don’t understand why the focus is on the 20% . WHO controls the 80%?

Australia is preparing a fuel rationing scheme - 90% of Australia’s fuel comes from Asia, which gets it from the Middle East - 42 stations have no fuel at all - 107 have run out of diesel Meanwhile, the war is escalating... this is quickly getting out of control.

@shanaka86 Why would China need to patrol the strait if they are on good terms with Iran?

BREAKING: The President of the United States told China this morning to start policing the Strait of Hormuz. China’s response was not a warship. It was gold. Six hundred kilograms of gold bars allocated by major Chinese banks this morning were sold out in under one minute at the 9am Shanghai opening. One hundred kilograms allocated for the weekend sold out in the same window last Saturday. This has been happening every single trading day while bunker-busters hit Natanz and 5,000 Marines head to the Gulf and Trump tells the world America does not need Hormuz. China heard the message. China’s answer is not military. It is monetary. The People’s Bank of China has purchased gold for 16 consecutive months. Reserves reached 2,308 tonnes by February. The Shanghai Gold Exchange recorded 126 tonnes of withdrawals in January and 85 in February. Chinese gold ETFs added 38 tonnes in January, the strongest start to any year on record. Seventy-seven percent of central banks globally now intend to increase gold reserves over the next 12 months. Gold touched $5,589 per ounce in January before correcting to $4,494 this week. Chinese retail buyers did not care. They bought the dip because the dip happened in paper. The physical metal in their hands did not lose weight. Trump said the words today: “We don’t use the Strait of Hormuz. We don’t need it. Europe, Korea, Japan and China need it. They will have to get involved a little bit.” China imports more than 70 percent of its crude from the Middle East and Africa, the largest share transiting Hormuz. Trump is telling China to send warships to protect a shipping lane that American forces are simultaneously disrupting through a war against Iran. The request is structurally impossible. China will not deploy naval assets alongside the fleet that is bombing its strategic partner. So China deploys capital instead. Gold is the asset that cannot be sanctioned, cannot be frozen, cannot be confiscated by executive order, and does not transit the Strait of Hormuz. This is not a gold rush. A rush implies speculation. This is rearmament. The PBOC is building reserves outside the dollar system. Chinese households are converting savings into a store of value independent of American financial infrastructure. Hainan’s free-trade port has become a gold shopping destination. Banks ration supply because demand exceeds every ceiling Beijing sets. The queue at ICBC is not for jewellery. It is for monetary sovereignty, purchased 600 kilograms at a time. The symmetry with Natanz is exact. The United States has bombed Iran’s nuclear facility five times in 16 years. The programme survives because nuclear knowledge cannot be destroyed by ordnance. China is building a gold reserve that the United States cannot reach because physical metal in a sovereign vault cannot be frozen by SWIFT exclusion. Both strategies operate on the same principle: the thing that matters most is the thing that cannot be taken away. For Iran it is the physics equation. For China it is the gold bar. Both are responses to the same American power projection. Both are designed to outlast it. The West is fighting a kinetic war over a strait it controls militarily. The East is fighting a monetary war over a reserve asset it controls physically. Both wars are happening on the same day. Neither side has acknowledged the other’s battlefield. The strait is 21 miles wide. The gold bar is 400 ounces. And the distance between them is the distance between the world that is ending and the world that is beginning. Full analysis: open.substack.com/pub/shanakaans…

@Mon4Kooyong If scientists are so smart, why do they waste so much time

We can’t call ourselves a “clever country” if we refuse to properly fund science. Many Australian researchers spend more than 30% of their working year writing grant applications with a less than 10% chance of success. That's a major drag on a sector which the government says is key to productivity gains. theage.com.au/national/austr…

@FinancialReview We had Job seeker, and job keeper, now... Fuel Seeker

National cabinet has established a taskforce to co-ordinate distribution of fuel to areas of need, and canvassed the prospect of rationing if the conflict drags on. ebx.sh/4JCdWE

@FinancialReview It has to be said, bullish for housing

Treasury predicts that inflation could soar to 5 per cent and petrol prices could remain elevated for three years, even if the conflict in Iran ends soon. ebx.sh/8CcOif

@d_gilz Big Short 2 starring Ryan Gosling as Ayatollah Khomeni

There are countries who get 70-80% of their oil from the Strait of Hormuz who’s stock markets are acting like nothing is happening

@AvidCommentator He did say to buy no more fuel than necessary. That's the signal to begin stockpiling food and dunny paper

Its absolutely silly that the government still hasn't told Australians to voluntarily conserve fuel. We need to squeeze out every last extra day of supply if we can. Albo needs to get real, we aren't a developed nation on this, we are hopelessly third world.

@MichaelWestBiz @StuartMcCarthy_ For decades I've heard about the 1970s oil shocks - they ain't shit compared to what's about to happen

Australia is seriously vulnerable to the Iran War, exposed to soaring oil prices, tanking markets and strategic/defence blunders. Former officer @StuartMcCarthy_ analysis #auspol michaelwest.com.au/costs-of-albos…

@mark_slapinski Iran's got missiles and shit

I'm still confused. Please help me here. Why is America at war with Iran?!

@RadishHarmers Remember when computers were as large as a room. They are returning to that size

I cannot believe my life lasted long enough for computers to stop being fun.

@RageSheen The veil about to be lifted a second time

Uh oh. Large numbers of Australians could be lifted out of poverty again. For the second time in their lives.