Dan Burdick

@rightupyouralii until my mid-twenties I thought general anesthetic was the generic brand and local anesthetic was the hospital’s homebrew

@bearsaremean Yes your strength is your writing and probably bench press or whatever tf but I haven't read any of it in 14 years and coincidentally the world went to shit

20+ since Charles Grodin yelled at Martin Short to act like a human boy and I have carried that insult in my heart ever since, I love it so much. And "human" is so funnier than "normal human", the bar is so much lower, after all this time my only contribution to the joke has been to make it worse. Just give me one more decade, let me workshop this one a bit, my strength is not improv

@carebecc If your phone is missing just call it

Reading a manuscript for an audiobook I'm about to record; absentmindedly find myself thinking I should get the audiobook to listen to so I can multitask. But doctor i am audiobook :(

@Adaora_ble @richbrian I love that show.

@richbrian That's how I felt about the anime Carole & Tuesday. It's just a cute music anime about two girls from different backgrounds making music. And also they are on Mars.

is there a movie that’s set in space but doesn’t acknowledge it at all, like a crazy stupid love type romcom but in space for no reason

@margolis1 @mguybowman

@mguybowman To be fair when’s the last time you met someone with the last name “Lennon”

the Beatles are a band where three guys have the world’s most normal names and one guy has a name you absolutely never hear and somehow he’s not even the main guy

@Jacob_Tsimerman @davidbessis @littmath @willdepue I was feeling pretty low today but Jacob's tweet made me feel better about the world

Hey @littmath , I've seen you post this sentiment a lot, and want to push back a bit (in my formal twitter-posting debut!). So my math career has almost entirely been "solve this problem". Now, of course there is an enormous amount of other activities such as formulating toy problems, identifying which ones are worthwhile, theory building, and selection and formulation of the original problems. But typically for 80%+ of my time, I know what problem I'm trying to solve and am just trying to solve it. I've seen the view expressed a lot that this is sort of not-the-main-point, and is just a part of figuring out the appropriate mathematical structure and phenomena. It's not that this is untenable, but I feel this is a somewhat overstated perspective. For one thing, talks (almost) always start/end with "here is the theorem I have proven". Its not that the view you have of math isn't coherent, but I could equally formulate the point of math as 1. Find a fun phenomenon 2. Make a problem capturing it as nicely as possible 3. Solve it, possibly by building theories and formulating sub-problems. so that problem-solving become the central point of math, and theory building as a side-effect. Indeed, mathematicians offer measure the value of a theory by the problems it can solve. This is at least an important part of a theory. I actually feel you and I are not far apart in our mathematical taste, so I'm curious how much we actually disagree here (I suspect the answer is "some"). Sorry for the overly long post! I am very much a twitter-newbie and will have to adjust.

we‘re really living through a historic moment for mathematics. it’s pretty incredible to watch

@HubPointless The show was also enormously successful for years afterward. The phrase has been morphed into to meaning the moment something inevitably begins to fail but it historically meant when something runs out of ideas and becomes a caricature of itself.

@DurvidImel @Jamie7Keller @ArtDecider

2026

@speedgump @Elijah_skrrr @afraidofwasps Is all of this true

@Elijah_skrrr @afraidofwasps Nahh you don’t know him like that we used to call him Andre 3.0 back in the day

I like in Hey Ya when André 3000 says "Lend me some sugar, I am your neighbor!" He is my neighbor

@jazayerli Got em right where we want em.

The Royals tonight were the first team in major league history to: 1) walk zero times 2) strike out 17+ times 3) hit zero home runs 4) win

@adrianmckinty "I know. You were good." 😭

reading about ben affleck and matt damon getting the robin williams award gives me another chance to tell this story... i have told it before on twitter a couple of times so please bear w me if you've heard it... anyway, I was working in barnes and noble in the mid 1990s...

@Ra2Rihd Make a hole for the puppy too! Also:

女さん、自分の形にベッドをくり抜いて、新しい寝る方法を発明した

@Celsius233Books @JayWrightCooper @emmajo "Flounder" by itself is pretty savage.

@JayWrightCooper @emmajo Hahaha. Flounder. Nice 🫡

need a slur for idea guys who are unemployed yet somehow also too busy to execute on any of their ideas

@ChrisTheDaneLa1 @CosmosMTG @HeavyPlayLLC Winning tomorrow to have a hall of fame career after your first career would be a funny bit.

Ran hotter than the sun ☀️ Top8 #PTSOS 😎😈😎 Playing Gw Landfall aka The Spanish Picnic Basket 🧺 @CosmosMTG @HeavyPlayLLC

@MatthewLNass @fireshoes 🍻

Top 8! Always feels good to do well with a brew.

@Mengu09 That dies of heat exposure

Lost in the PTQ and decided to walk 30 minuts in the desert sun back to hotel with long jeans. It’s a game of decisions and we’re not making the best ones today. 😅

@PlayMTG @Nathansteuer1 Are you telling me a deck with 81 fetch lands splashed a second color.

Congratulations to #PTSOS Day 1 undefeated player Nathan Steuer! Steuer's Selesnya Landfall deck went too wide and demanded too many answers, propelling him to an 8-0 start to his tournament!

@SethBurn @TStrong24 @MartinJuza @MSigrist83 That's more concerning!

@TStrong24 @MartinJuza @MSigrist83 Fair

After going 3-0 in draft 1, @MSigrist83’s round 4 opponent didnt show up. First person to lock day 2 at #PTSOS Siggy wins again!

@HairlineGod @HazelAppleyard Why aren't your stressed? What are you a millionaire or something?

@HazelAppleyard Yea, just live normally for 6months lol but it would be stress free knowing you’re safe financially. I’d still go to work & pay bills but that worry of being able to maintain would go away. Set the bills on autopay & keep moving

Surely you would just not spend anything?

@handthatholds_ Ok thank you my tummy hurts

I’m going to dump a truckload of this into my city’s water supply

@falseroxy I wonder how many of those things I have left from childhood that I just haven't said out loud for 30 years

any time a fly was around he would say it was clarence, a fly he met in vietnam. i truly didn't think about it until i was 19, i was like 'yeah this fly clarence followed my dad around his whole life' and someone was like, 'flies only live for like 48 hours.'