Neil Caplan

@Heloise_Werner @IggyPop @BBC6Music @rbirchallmusic @JulianAzkoul @CellinAlexander @bass_schofield @delphianrecords Did you really have dinner with Iggy Pop? It's a great story even if he misremembers

Thanks @IggyPop for playing the opening track of my album on your @BBC6Music show today !! Beautiful piece by Barbara Strozzi arranged by @rbirchallmusic, feat. Max Baillie @JulianAzkoul Ruth Gibson @CellinAlexander & @bass_schofield bbc.co.uk/programmes/m00… 💥💥 @delphianrecords

@thechurchmouse I wonder what Jesus or St Paul would offer considering that both preached against religion all the time

While belief in God is up, ‘religion’ has a worse poll rating than Rishi Sunak.

@SoVeryBritish Rather eat vomit

When it comes to fish and chips as a meal, mushy peas are…

A little bit about fish and chips from the brand new book, ‘Britain According to Very British Problems’, the definitive A-Z guide to Britain. geni.us/VBPBritain

@AndyBTravels I've been to asbury park. It's safe. Don't go to Atlantic city though

Has anyone taken the train down to Bay Head from Newark? When I’m in US prior to taking the QM2 and have a spare day so fancy doing some #allthelines Just want seek advice if it is safe….🤨

@seatsixtyone @FT Perhaps they could close every tat shop and fence on Britain's worst shopping street as well and then it may be worth going to. Grade A dump is Oxford st

About time! In any other UK city, Oxford Street would have been pedestrianised 40 years ago. “London’s mayor announces plan to pedestrianise Oxford Street” ft.com/content/d4324f… via @ft

@SoVeryBritish Very restrained not to smack them in the face

I just held a door open for someone and, without looking up or acknowledging me, they stopped in the doorway and started typing on their phone. I quickly decided I had three options: 1. Simply releasing the door from my grip, letting it swing into them as I walk away 2. Close the door slowly towards them and see how they react 3. Lightheartedly say, “are you coming through then?” I went for number 3. Without a word and still not looking up, they simply continued through the door.

@SoVeryBritish Bbcs favourite woke correction kiev

What’s a word from a foreign language that Brits absolutely love to try and pronounce very correctly? I’ll go for: “croissant”

@artsytype_83 Just remember to stop after season 1. Genuinely great series they felt the need to reheat ad nauseam after using all their ideas

@GreenpeaceUK Enjoy the power cuts you idiots

📢GOOD NEWS: The last day of this month will be the last day Britain is be powered by coal - as the final power station closes. Britain's reliance on coal-fired power is finally coming to end after 140 years!

@thechurchmouse @krishk I appreciate the church is not great at this but the solution is to read the bible. At which point it is blindingly obvious in every book and many chapters. We should want to read it

Very late to it, but just finished @krishk ‘s God is Stranger. Profoundly challenging in the very best way. I’m grateful for it. Also has this zinger at the end.

@SoVeryBritish Sausage sandwich. The 3 best are boxing day football

What are the two greatest words in the English language? I’d go for: Sandwich Platter

@DumTeeDum Don't wear them on aeroplane escape slides though

Let the tally begin: how many times does High Heels get a namecheck? #TheArchers

@jaredcwilson It was just a day off

Sign me up for Evangelicals for Ferris

@David__Osland Try renting you selfish person ; you've been subsidised for 20 years

Liz Truss says that reminding her she crashed the economy is 'not funny'. My £400 a month mortgage hike wasn't a barrel of laughs either.

@HeatherJConder Can they get the ADC cast back together for it?

Please let this be true 🙏

@prodnose If it makes it. Cinema is dying mainly cos the film companies make bilge

Great they let you know what will be at your local ABC in 3 years time eh?

@SoVeryBritish Other people's biscuits are free

“The best things in life are free” Lies. Biscuits are not free.

@seatsixtyone Undeniably bad news

Good news, Gotthard Base Tunnel reopens fully 2 September - although an extra hour to go via the scenic route was a sort of bonus!

@SoVeryBritish Matchmakers. Neopolitan ice cream

My favorite British food genre is ‘pretend posh / food you thought was just for sophisticated millionaires when you were a child.’

@GeorgeMonbiot @JustStop_Oil Hahahahhahahhaba. Privileged rich scum screwing peoples lives up deserve life inside

The sentences handed to the five @JustStop_Oil campaigners are utterly disproportionate. Four and five years in prison for peaceful protest? This is what you might expect in Russia or Egypt, not in a supposed democracy. theguardian.com/environment/ar…