Mother of Bad Dogs 🐀

It’s been 4 years now and my son makes me proud every day. We just filed his name change paperwork and he was just accepted into college. I’m excited for his future.

Trump to a kid who says he wants to be a weightlifter: "You'll never compete against women in powerlifting. Did you see they had a man powerlifter and he decided to go the opposite direction? Do you think you can take me in a fight?"

@Sonar706 @theliamnissan Love it!

@HeathRobin @theliamnissan

If anyone wants shades and a doobie post your profile picture in the replies and I'll do as many as I can

@atrupar lol yeah sure. That’s what they are calling it.

Trump: "The Trump manufacturing boom is what they're calling it. Now, the plants will be opening over the next period of time. Pretty soon."

@Variety @sherylkahn He can fuck all the way off.

Trump's White House marked #StarWars Day by sharing a new image of Trump as the Mandalorian and writing: "In a galaxy that demands strength - America stands ready. This is the way. May the 4th be with you." The image depicts Trump's Mandalorian holding the bounty hunter’s helmet in his hand, a severe violation of the Mandalorian code. variety.com/2026/more/news…

@theliamnissan Is Dora the Ford Explorer taken?

Datsun Hoffman™ is a good one. Somebody take it.

@bambibristol @justsomeguy2u Whenever possible, I hook my car up to my neighbor’s horse. Smart! It pulls the car and all I have to do is give it some hay.

As an experiment I shall spend today ‘only driving downhill whenever possible’… Stay tuned to see if I have to eventually drive up hill to return home.

I don’t understand why the team isn’t in the water trying to catch more terrapins? You got one before. #NakedandAfraid

@heathrp123 He’s disgusting. Rick the ick.

This guy is such a POS 💩 ! Crying at the airport when he just got out of bed with another girl! 🤢🤮#90DayFiance #90DayFianceBeforeThe90Days

For fucks sake Emma is thirsty. #90DayFianceBeforeThe90Days

@MTGraveStudio I’m going to be cremated and put into a block that grows coral in the ocean.

When you die, what are your final wishes? If not listed, comment your choice below 👇

@DrOz JFK you sound stupid.

Some folks made a big deal out of President Trump joking that diet soda is “healthy.” So yesterday on Air Force One, the President switched things up for us with a spicy virgin Bloody Mary—turns out the real recipe for good health might just be a sense of humor.

@khanadan99 @PrezLives2022 Good. I hope it fucking hurts.

BREAKING: Israeli PM Netanyahu is facing critical health condition, he has blood cancer diagnosed yesterday.

@atrupar He’s disgusting

Trump: "Somalia, it's a beautiful place. It's got no anything. It's got one thing that's really strong -- crime. All they do is run around shooting each other. It's filthy dirty, disgusting dirty. It's a horrible place. They come here, and Ilhan Omar, she heads it. She married her brother. I would imagine they're looking at her. Isn't she despicable? We ought to get those people the hell out of our country."

@noyeahobviously She must terrify her kids.

This is the scariest video clip I’ve ever seen in my life

@FlavorFlav @billboard This is so beautiful. Thank you for being their champion!

@billboard No formal meet and greets as quoted by Fox,,, I ain’t making the women work. But there will be free public parade and celebration concert ,,, imma put myself to work 👍🏾

Flavor Flav Announces SHE Weekend to Celebrate Women’s Sports & Olympic Athletes: ‘Now It’s a Movement’ billboard.com/music/rb-hip-h…

@MeachamDr @GodzillaHaiku

FYI: the Creative Seashell Threat Workshop that was originally scheduled for this afternoon has been moved to tomorrow at 2:30pm. This will be held in the atrium lobby. Let Sharon in HR know if you can’t make it. Shells provided. Hail Satan.

@SaraForTexLege @gothicdisco I’m grateful that we renewed ours last month.

I have decided to focus on the things that I am grateful for. Today, I am grateful that my passport does not expire until 2029.

@HQNewsNow He’s a fucking moron

Trump: Windsor Castle, a structure that's so long it never seemed to end. It was built by a gentleman named William the Conqueror. I asked the king, I said, 'was he a nice man, William the Conqueror?' He said, 'I tend to doubt it.'

@gayguycandleco @NancyMace I pray for that lonely little blood clot.

@NancyMace Oh… I pray. I pray every fucking day. 🙏🏼

Pray for our President.