Jazzmodius

Saint Peter Gently Asks Chuck Norris To Stop Roundhouse Kicking The Cherubim buff.ly/KtswFfv

@NotKennyRogers I’ll bet he has huge tits.

FYI - Here's a picture of the douche nozzle who wrote the Chuck Norris article for Variety:

@PulpLibrarian He was awesome in Hot Fuzz

Happy birthday to Timothy Dalton, born today in 1946!

@RealDeanCain @Variety @Variety is incapable of doing better.

Dumbest headline. Do better @Variety

Perhaps the greatest community note of all time.

@canarymission #FuckIslam

EXCLUSIVELY EXPOSED: “We proclaim our support for the Islamic republic! Shame, shame USA!” “We condemn the assassination of martyr Ali Khamenei! Martyrdom is our highest honor!” NJ resident and computer science student at Suffolk Community College, Taha Hasnain, wants to make sure everyone knows what the anti-Israel movement really stands for.

@davidzweig @bariweiss The teachers union is a national threat

Pittsburgh Public Schools will be closed for three days, and compel "asynchronous" remote learning, because of the NFL Draft. Since the city will have a lot of visitors this will "ensure students can continue learning safely and effectively." Unreal. publicsource.org/pittsburgh-pub…

@BernieSanders First of all, you don’t know shit. It’s time for you to take a nap and change your diaper.

Jeff Bezos, worth $234 billion, plans to replace 600,000 Amazon workers with robots. Now, he wants to spend $100 billion to fully automate not just his warehouses, but factories in the U.S & other countries. Oligarchs are waging all out war against workers. FIGHT BACK.

44 years since we lost Randy Rhoads. A quiet genius who reshaped heavy metal, turning solos into mini symphonies. From “Mr. Crowley” to “Diary of a Madman,” his craft still sets the standard. We miss you, Randy.

@MarioNawfal @Lukewearechange The government eats its own. Fuck them.

🚨🇺🇸 BREAKING: Joe Kent, the former counterterrorism director who pushed back on the Iran war justification is now under FBI investigation. In Washington, the fastest way to get investigated is to tell the truth at the wrong time.

@disclosetv @LPNational Do we believe the reports from the @washingtonpost now?

JUST IN - Pentagon asks the White House ​to ​approve a more ⁠than $200,000,000,000 ​billion request ​to the U.S. Congress to ​fund ​the Iran War — WaPo

And that brings Us, as Gambling people, to the terrible truth that March is also the month of the NCAA basketball tournament—and we know what That means for Gamblers, don’t we? Yes sir. It is Extremely Dangerous territory for even the coolest and calmest Professional risk takers—much less for emotionally berserk Amateurs with “Home Team Fever.” Those people are Doomed. That is a Mathematical Certainty, like a game of Musical Chairs with only One chair. You don’t need a pencil to figure that one out.

@MDSebach Jesus…

So ... it turns out that England jailed English fascists who were Hitler supporters during England's war against Hitler's fascist Germany. And Tucker wants you to think Trump will do that to him because he supports the fascist Iranian regime.

@SenBooker You talk a lot of shit for being so stupid

Tonight, on the Senate floor, I will call up my War Powers Resolution to withdraw U.S. forces from this reckless and unauthorized war of choice with Iran. The Senate must do its job and hold this administration accountable.

Oh, Dear God, I’m going to lose it!

@donwinslow You misspelled Islam

Donald Trump is destroying the world.

Who doesn't love some ZARDOZ cookies

@Rothmus You would have to be pretty shitfaced to want to touch your lips to theirs anyway.

Were they always like this?

How does a government remove your guns? With their guns. So, guns are not removed from society at all. All that is removed is the balance of power between citizens and state.