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@SarahHamstera @PeopleOfUK Thank you. I'm looking for some at the weekend but if I don't find any I'll let you know.

@SarahHamstera @PeopleOfUK Th

Very much into house plants lately. Anyone else? This is my latest beauty.

@SarahHamstera @PeopleOfUK Thank you. I'll look for some. I think they're beautiful.

@JobsFootball @PeopleOfUK Sure you can have a cutting. They're jade necklace plants, aka worm plants which is not as nice a name. Happy little succulents that need light and a little bit of water. Propagate so easily.

@theworldofwhat @BigBobBubbka @big_tino @fesshole I think not only a 6 part series but @robmanuel could probably get a whole stage show out of that thread.

@BigBobBubbka @big_tino @fesshole I'm sure there's 6 part series waiting to be made, it would write itself, it would seem thrown together, but we'd know different.

Me and the missus watch porn to get us in the mood, she once suggested Gay porn so I agreed as I'd get a shag but now I can only watch gay porn. It's a massive turn on.

@SarahHamstera @PeopleOfUK They're beautiful. What are they? And if you don't know can I have a cutting?

@PeopleOfUK Absolute weeds! Gorgeous though aren't they?

@phil_1965 @theipaper @BenGartside @HugoGye For the simple reason that private health care are happy to give you a new knee but try turning up at your private hospital with a heart attack and see where it gets you, you numpty.

@theipaper @BenGartside @HugoGye Bring it on, and cut NI if you have private medical insurance, why should you pay for both

Rishi Sunak met private US social care providers to discuss ‘opportunities’ in the UK 🔴 Exclusive from @BenGartside & @HugoGye inews.co.uk/news/politics/…

Lively and brave set from @Brixsmithstart at @Rock_City_Notts it’s been a long time! Loved the spirit, attitude, new material and T shirt. Thanks for playing “Totally Wired” #BrixSmith #PIL #RockCity

@OllieCarlisle1 @Brixsmithstart Just seen Brix supporting PiL at Rock City tonight and they were excellent. As were PiL to be fair. First gig in ages in ages where it felt like I was watching 2 bands of equal importance rather than a "starter" and a "main" if that makes sense.

@Brixsmithstart You're so welcome! Black Butterfly might be my song of the year (or next year, depending when it comes out!) Hope you tour round these parts when the album is released. Thanks for having reasonably priced t-shirts too!

What an absolutely lovely tweet to wake up to. Thank you! ❤️‍🔥

@afrodids @fesshole The thing is superglue is hydrophilic. The more water you expose it to the stronger it gets. That's why it sticks your fingers together, it sucks the moisture out of your skin.

@fesshole Na superglue isn't that strong or waterproof!

A girl in our student flat had an elaborate rotary cheese grater. It was a real pain to clean and she only used it when it wasn't her turn to wash up. After a few weeks it totally seized up and she had to bin it. Thanks superglue. Sorry, not sorry Diana.

Funniest thing I've read today. 🤣

@MeganWi90287242 @KEdge23 @ChrisFraser1 @BorisJohnson You must be a bot. No human is THAT stupid.

@KEdge23 @ChrisFraser1 Clear win for @BorisJohnson in the confidence vote. Greater percentage than in his initial leadership competition, greater percentage that Starmer got in his leadership competition.

Boris will not resign as Prime Minister and I don’t feel he should. It is not the same as Theresa May. She only resigned months after winning her confidence vote because she couldn’t get Brexit done. She was at a deadlock. Boris isn’t. Let’s now move on. #NoConfidenceVote

@KEdge23 As soon as everyone admits that Johnsons "oven ready" deal is just May's deal with a few bits crossed out the goose is cooked.

🔵Community Job Opportunity⚪️ 👀We're seeking an ambitious Community Administrator to support the #ColU Sport & Education Team! 👇👇 🗒️drive.google.com/file/d/1t-GDMf… 💻jobs.aspiremediagroup.net/jobs/community… ☎️01206 755160 📧Fitc@colchesterunited.net #UniteOurCommunites

Please retweet to help Leo find a home #LANCASHIRE #ENGLAND Aged 3, Labrador x Staffy, he's reactive around other dogs so best as the only pet in an adult home. Can anyone give this lovely lad a second chance? 🍀🤞 DETAILS or APPLY👇 bleakholt.org/lancashire-ani… #dogs #petcrisis22

@MetroRider30 @LancsBusRT No

@FlamingPhoeniks @fesshole Are public toilets like public schools. Remember bozo went to a public school as did nearly all of our politicians.

@fesshole I was thinking public toilets I hasten to add 🤦🏻‍♀️😂

I find it strangely comforting when I go to the toilet and take a seat only to discover that it is still warm from the previous occupant

@EdwardCaravan @fesshole I think it did that somewhere around kitchen sofa. But who cares? It's still funnier than Happy Days ever was.

I photoshopped my boss's property valuation letter, meaning he could easily remortgage his house for about a million more than it was worth. Still owes me, the bastard.

@fesshole Am I the only person reading this and wondering "Which way round?"

Aged 18, my girlfriend and I were in an online chat room with some guy when he suddenly suggested she should try anal with me. She did. 20 years later, it's still an occasional treat. Thanks weird internet guy!

@PablitoEEG @LesTapo66 @fesshole And probably £500 quid more than the one at Matlock too.

Worked in the strong room - money-counting secure area - at a UK theme park with a load of teenagers counting money all day. The thievery was rife. One day the loo stopped flushing. I opened the lid and found £1500 in damp notes. Nicked it, bought a car. No regrets.

Childrens Sports Coach – Little Kickers UK – Hampton jobsfootball.co.uk/job/childrens-…