KING RAINHEAD

if you prick your finger by accident and suck on it, you become your own blood brother & you have to take care of yourself no matter what

@anton_labae I need this cut but with more support but NOT wiring iykwim

i know i’ve whined on here begging for sexy bra recs for people who have tits that are too flat and wide-set for underwires or triangles and everyone in the same boat was like “yeah sorry good luck” so here’s one i got recently and like aimeecherieintimates.com/collections/ba…

@freshchonk @HatfieldAnne @aggiefuntime @BarelyBeans @praisecheese @sophielou @slitthroatz @SketchesbyBoze @girl_a_whirl @nintendo6664 @ellewasamistake @nachosarah @Pork_Chop_Hair @_neckbread @AbbieEvansXO I’m a woman

@KingRainhead @HatfieldAnne @aggiefuntime @BarelyBeans @praisecheese @sophielou @slitthroatz @SketchesbyBoze @girl_a_whirl @nintendo6664 @ellewasamistake @nachosarah @Pork_Chop_Hair @_neckbread @AbbieEvansXO who are also men

#FF funniest women on the timeline @KingRainhead @HatfieldAnne @aggiefuntime @BarelyBeans @praisecheese @sophielou @slitthroatz @SketchesbyBoze @girl_a_whirl @nintendo6664 @evildanevil @ellewasamistake @nachosarah @Pork_Chop_Hair @_neckbread @JRobb773 @AbbieEvansXO

@Big_Daddy_Simsy BIG DADDY SAUCE HELLO

@KingRainhead Where have you gone, come back to us!

might fuck around and seal away an ancient evil in an extremely common household object just to stir the pot 100 years from now

@jeffjasa No

Would a tattoo of stewie griffin and Bart Simpson smoking weed be cool?

@sadddsongs And happy bday ❤️‍🔥

it’s my birthday and my wife has the day off too and I want to do my favorite thing which is binge watch a whole season of a new show in bed. What show should we watch?

@sadddsongs Little Women!!

@KRB18RPT hi reptile clinton

@KingRainhead Thx

Lotta ppl are mad, saying AI can’t do art only a human can do art. Well, kinda reminds me of how ppl used to think only a human could be a 5-star chef in a fancy French restaurant… til one brave rodent w/a dream proved them all wrong

@RobTheChick 😈

@KingRainhead Holy shit you’re still here?

@stillwondering1 *Slowly working my way over to you across a grassy field with a fairly blunt scythe*

Carrying a pitchfork around from now on it is my right.

Communities absolutely MUST wake up & replace police officers with matchmakers. End crime once & for all by helping people find true love & turn it around. Replace prisons with deep ponds of the clearest blue where couples can paddle around in boats gazing into one anothers’ eyes

@ReptilianGore @impimeok Not a thing

When your body randomly creaks and pops it's because you're actually an enchanted puppet and the old hag's spells are finally wearing off

@lndsymrt Where in Florida? In the wild South no less

I really gotta book a flight to Florida so me and my brother and our significant others can go rescue my mom and bring her ass back home in the middle of all THIS?!? She really picked right now to go apeshit huh? The audacity.

@canary_burgundy It is a glaze

@cakemittens Wow way to brag about what a great fucking friend you are and what a privilege it is to know you

seeing a lot of people using the "what is your impact on the internet" prompt to brag about their tweets. maybe I'm not as self-obsessed but I think MY biggest impact has been the friendships I've made

@k_voltaire Bro do u even Madonna whore complex

@fillegrossiere @_lizharvey Twitter is glitching notifications and it sent me this one today moment of silence for the impending extinction of alt cheerleader trope