Laurent Sellier retweetledi
Quite a few years ago, as I was wrapping up a Netflix product meeting, Patty McCord, our VP of HR pulled me aside. “You know,” she said, “you’re always talking about how you want to make sure we’re getting everyone’s input, right? Well, tell me—who did most of the talking in that meeting?”
I hung my head. What could I say?
I had gotten so carried away with my own opinions that I hadn’t left time for anyone else’s. I was so consumed with talking that I had stopped listening. And that realization, as Robert Frost once put it, has made all the difference.
I realized that the key is not necessarily to talk less. It’s to listen more. And I mean real listening, where you are focusing on what the other person is saying…rather than just plotting the brilliant thing you’ll say as soon as they have finished talking. You’ll learn more, and they’ll feel heard. Win/win.
And no, you don’t need the chess clock. In your next meeting, just ask yourself—who’s doing all the talking?
If you’re still stuck, just remember Abraham Lincoln’s advice: “Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.”
English
