LimeriTweets / WoodyGuth3

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LimeriTweets / WoodyGuth3

LimeriTweets / WoodyGuth3

@LimeriTweets

I am a limericist, ukuleleist & archivist with conscience. I try to make bad news bearable. “TREASONS GREETINGS” booklet online. #TheResistance #Limericks

New York, USA, Planet Earth Katılım Nisan 2010
7.5K Takip Edilen5K Takipçiler
John (repeat1968) Buss
John (repeat1968) Buss@repeat1968·
Markwayne Mullin seems qualified to head the Department of Homeland Security. Send this to your Senator to let them know!
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Afroman
Afroman@ogafroman·
"In all circumstances, the jury finds in favor of the defendant"
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Patrick Hedger
Patrick Hedger@pat_hedger·
This is America’s 250th birthday gift.
Count Dankula@CountDankulaTV

The Afroman Trial. -Cops raid Afromans house for bullshit reasons. -Steal money, break his door, fuck his house up. -No criminality found whatsoever, no charges at all pressed on Afroman. -Afroman spends the next 3 years making songs that make fun of all the officers involved by name, even using footage of the raid from his own CCTV cameras. -Songs had titles like "Randy Walters is a son of a bitch" and "Lick Em Low Lisa" accusing one of the officers of being a lesbian and sleeping with the other officers wives. -During the raid one officer looked like he was about to eat some lemon pound cake sitting on Afromans counter, Afroman made a whole album calling the officer fat. -The cops get mad and file a lawsuit for defamation. -Afroman turns up to court in a whole American flag suit. -Officers performatively mald and cry while listening to the songs really trying to oversell how badly the songs upset them. -One officer was suing because Afroman made a whole song about him saying he was fucking the officers wife. When the officer was asked if Afroman was really fucking his wife, he said "I don't know". Nuking his own case and establishing that there is a non-zero chance that Afroman might actually be fucking his wife. -As his only witness for the trial, Afroman brought a deputies EX FUCKING WIFE. -The jury ruled completely in favour of Afroman. This entire thing has been a great win for free speech and absolutely fucking hilarious.

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Valerie
Valerie@queen__valerie_·
Any kidnapping victims inside my suit pockets? 🎶😭 There are no kidnapping victims inside my suit pocketssssss🗣️🎶😭 I cannot stop laughing. 😭😭😭😭#Afromantrial @ogafroman
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Republicans against Trump
Republicans against Trump@RpsAgainstTrump·
BREAKING: Markwayne Mullin’s nomination for DHS Secretary clears the Senate Homeland Security Committee in an 8–7 vote, heading to the full Senate. Democratic Sen. John Fetterman voted yes. Republican Sen. Rand Paul voted no.
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Brown Eyed Susan
Brown Eyed Susan@smc429·
Fetterman is now screaming at reporters, as well? Maybe he can take over for Leavitt when she goes on leave.
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Christopher Webb
Christopher Webb@cwebbonline·
Welp… Markwayne Mullin’s nomination is headed for the Senate floor. Yesterday he was spinning tales about that “official,” “classified” 2015 trip. Democrats should have asked about his 2021 trips, ignoring State Department and congressional warnings and flying himself into Afghanistan on a personal Rambo mission. Not once. Twice. Both failed.
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Esta
Esta@TheOnlyEsta·
Fill in the blanks John Fetterman is a _________
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