David Minto

@bmay Benidorm doesn’t want you. Pick up Tommy and do one.

Great patriot Altar Mitty is off to become a migrant somewhere. Absolutely superb news. Bye!

@bo66ie29 Then went home to beat the wife and cuddle the cat

The great tradition of the local pub, where men in flat caps and tweed suits like to have a pint and a smoke. Filmed in the 1950s.

@ChaponaBike123 In Spain it’s illegal to ride on the road where a cycle lane has been provided. Seems sensible.

Here's some really shit driving for you all to have a look at.

@KingBobIIV Ahh yes, the succulent democratic process.

The MOST terrifying realisation for most of us over the last 2 months is that we've realised we have absolutely no way, as a country, to remove a dangerous leader. We've spent 100s years policing Europe, instilling treaties and courts to ensure the behaviour of Mussloni, Hilter, Stalin, Slobodan Milošević, Franjo Tuđman, Ceaușescu, Francisco Franco etc - it seems to not have ever occurred to us to protect our own country, or that someone like them would ever rise to power. Like the above, media, information, courts, military and police have been weaponised against the people. And, we've got zero way of fighting it other than mass civil unrest, or national strike or/and a coordinated bill boycott.

Isabel Oakeshott’s mum spotted this afternoon at Skegness bus station.

@Locati0ns I’m about to drive from Santander to Alicante and this makes it seem much better😁 Thanks.

It’s all about perspective *

@thinkdefence BV 206 Instructor- one of the best courses I’ve ever done. Great bit of kit. And keeps Leconsfield pasties nice and warm.

This short video showcases the extreme terrain accessibility of the Bv206. Anywhere this can't go, you probably don't want to, although it might take a few tries!

@Posted_to_BAOR I issued worse from FVD Recklinghausen.

De-rust road springs & patch paint. Should be good after that…………..

@dublin_damo Acceptance of EU subsidies from Governments of all persuasions. I once worked for a northern council who were offered (not requested) EU financial support to assist with flood reduction infrastructure. Declined.

@Tipler1983 What have Dogs ever done?

Some of Ulstershires best graffiti, a thread 🧵 I’m not sure what this is, but it ruins “lifes” apparently.

@JHCPAL A client of mine once said how grateful he was for the Germans bombing Gateshead. When asked how surprised I was at his statement and was he sure, he said “they used soap”. For someone whose Dads Family were from The Felling, I laughed.

Yet more instantly understood terms on Tyneside : The Plate -not crockery Plate Day - ditto Burn -plenty, but no fire in sight Beamish Chare - not for sitting. Gateshead/Toon border Hinny - albeit Uni HR don't seem to know that one either...😉

@RealSirTomJones Thanks to you Sir Tom. Seville show was amazing.

I’d like to extend my thanks to each of you that came out to see my shows across the UK & Europe this Summer. It was truly a pleasure for the band, crew & myself & I hope you all enjoyed the experience as much as we did. Very much looking forward to my tour stateside next month!

@nutts2020 @JHCPAL What the memory does😁

@Penfoldio @JHCPAL That was the accordion-player. In the immortal words of Busker: "I miss the old blind busker, who stands in Fenwicks door. He plays a mean accordion, you've all seen him there before" The Pink missing any goal scored in the last 5 minutes of matches :)

Instantly understood on Tyneside with no further explanation necessary: Hancock - renamed but remembered. Bainbridge's - ditto! Fenwick's - goes without saying The Joicey - gone but still exists Windows - not made of glass Tuxedo - think boat Broon - not a hue.

@nutts2020 @JHCPAL Blind ‘Ronnie Gill’ seller outside Fenwicks. Getting ‘The Pink’ on a Saturday afternoon.

@JHCPAL Fenwick's window - seasonal treat Ronnie Gill - get yours here The Chron - what you're getting

@NoContextBrits Nooo

What does the British cow say?

@JHCPAL Or you could say the change from Greggs of Gosforth?

Instantly understood on Tyneside with no further explanation: The river - there are several BUT "the" means just one... The Dene - a lot of those too BUT "the" means just one.... Freeman,QE & Rake Lane - more 🤕 Stottie - a delicacy Greggs - a culinary export The match - ⚽

@JHCPAL Once they stopped selling ham & pease pudding and French salad stotties or even a Peach Melba, Greggs should have been removed from the lexicon.

@JackStanley86 I thought the one testicle thing was between us? 😁

So incredibly proud to have made GW’s beige list 😊

@Porkchop_EXP I live in a Spanish urb with Germans. Frequently they complain about gardening etc on a Sunday. Yet ask them to spend funds on improving the community & it’s always “NO. It’s has always been like this”. Strange culture & doesn’t change. I lived in Germany for 6 yrs from 1989

What makes the Germans so unlikeable is that they will be sticklers for this type of mundane, inconsequential “rules” while ignoring more important principles at higher levels as multiple almost daily corruption, negligence and unprofessionalism scandals demonstrate.

@mrmarksteel Christmas is cancelled. Daddy has recently qualified as a child protection social worker and is now cutting across the whole of sm lecturing on levels of independence.

There will be households where a kid asks ‘Mummy, why can’t we see daddy all weekend’? And she says ‘I told you, he has to hate Stewart Lee all morning, tweet about Jermaine Jenas until tonight, and scream on Facebook tomorrow about Lily Allen. Maybe we’ll see him at Christmas’.