Rupert

@ianeditz Excellent, 10/10.

@RupertThomson Hard to resist

I'll never understand why anyone goes to a foreign country for fun?

@Ice_Ice_JB You're the best at sweet-talk 😍

@RupertThomson Your belly looks too big, your dick too small and your butt a bit saggy. Is that enough negatives?

So, not only did I log out of the app to concentrate on work, I also deleted Royal Kingdom off of my phone, so I’ve briefly logged back in because I have nothing to do while I eat my microwave lasagne at the office. Rate my plate or summat

@Ice_Ice_JB I am looking forward to seeing the pics you took, after you refused to share the negatives with me

@RupertThomson GREAT! I’ll tweet #RupiesPantPics later.

@Ice_Ice_JB If you think I'm worried about a trivial bit of cutlery embarrassment, you're sorely mistaken. I live fot it.

@RupertThomson There’s one fork, 1 knife and 1 spoon. When you assume, you make an ass out of u, not me. I’ve come out of this embarrassing situation completely untarnished

@ianeditz Fair enough, seems like a reasonable exchange.

@RupertThomson My house is and features in their latest book. I'm getting a blue plaque

Tonight I was unexpectedly the centre piece of a local history tour.

@t0mbstoneblues That's the spirit! 😄

@RupertThomson Haha fine, I'll buy some more!

I put myself on a book buying-ban after I counted that there were 41 unread books on my shelves, and then accidentally immediately proceeded to buy a further nine books in four days

North Gibraltar beat West Falklands to clench the World cup. Well done all.

@Ice_Ice_JB Well that's just made me sad. Thanks. Didn't think this match could get any worse.

@RupertThomson She says it’s awful and will never shag you again.

GOAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLL! 1-0

@zippetey2dah @SueJ1973 @Dickwith2dogs So we've heard

@RupertThomson @SueJ1973 @Dickwith2dogs I'm flexible with my cream and jam

Just got served cunt at Betty's tea shop in Harrogate. 😢

@SueJ1973 @Dickwith2dogs Utter filth! 🤣

@Dickwith2dogs Does the cream or the jam go on first?

@SummerRay Dali would be proud of you!

@RupertThomson I went as spindly as possible

He’s every artist’s current muse. He’s Jimothy.

@ianeditz @RangeRover Oh jesus yeah, bloody hell. I'm glad for him, but obviously gutted. Any news on prosecution of the driver?

@RupertThomson I know, shocked us too. Better news regarding Lewis the husband of our interior designer who, if you remember, was nearly crushed to death outside the Sainsbury's next to us last October by drug driver in a @RangeRover

When your Electrician & plasterer get back to you with 6k quotes #names

@Dickwith2dogs Oh no

@AndrewNich9870 I like the ladders either side. Beautiful bit of symmetry.

Day 2 Fires installed and shelves in