The Secret CFO

How did one VP of Finance bring Macy's to its knees with a $151M accounting scandal? Here’s how I think it all went down… (THREAD)

@AdamRy_n Would like to do that

@SecretCFO We should talk, it’s what we do and can do it for anyone.

Someone buys a pair of underwear. A mattress. A car. Somebody signs a $300K software contract. Four different decisions. One took nine seconds, one took nine months. We measure all four the same way. Did they click, what did they touch last before they bought. There's a real push right now to build shared benchmarks for creators, one scoreboard everyone compares against. I get it. Right now, with no standard, the workaround is DMing a few people to ask what a good open rate even is. But a shared benchmark built on the wrong numbers just gets everyone agreeing on the same lie. The underwear and the $300K contract don't run on the same clock. Grading them on the same click tells you who's better at getting clicks and nothing about who moved a sale. What actually moved the decision is the thing worth knowing, and it's not the same moment for underwear as it is for enterprise software. I don't want a cleaner scoreboard. I want us to stop pretending the one we've got means anything for a nine-month deal.

@AdamRy_n for hubspot it's easy, they own everything from impression to a successful software sale - and can measure funnel progress at every step. But what about everyone else? what does best practice look like?

@AdamRy_n but how do you measure all of that as a creator? that is assuming access to downstream funnel / conversion data?

Pretty damn close.

@Joetenderloin @SwissRamble Joe are you trying to tease me into an entirely new stream of content, because if you are … I AM ABSOLUTELY HERE FOR IT.

@SwissRamble @SecretCFO - as we see player prices increasing at the top end and some multi club ownership. Would be interested to understand why this isn’t more prevalent. Is it a capex thing or management overhead or legislation or combo of all the above.

@kenthecoder Who’s writing off anyone who accomplished anything worthwhile?

@SecretCFO He’s saying what a lot of people in his position(wealth & status) won’t say publicly because they aren’t as autistic as he is. To write off Naval or anyone who has accomplished anything worthwhile - wholesale because you disagree with a take(s) is no bueno.

That Naval interview extract doing the rounds is as horrible an everyone says. It’s a terrible look for someone who has been held out as a philosopher and savant. Very bad for his personal brand imo. Everything worth having in life comes from sacrifice and compromise.

@27XVII @BigJohn043 VCs are almost uniquely unqualified for the execution of rollups

Reading the OpenAI press release on this security breach reminds me of this tweet…

@andrewglynch Exactly the same.

@SecretCFO I was kinda with him when he was talking about trying to keep a clear enough calendar that he could remember it all in his head he totally lost me at "my wife knows not to invite me to couples dinners and weddings" -- what on earth is that childish nonsense

I would genuinely do this if enough people wanted it. Admittedly I am radically under qualified for it.

@JaxArt15 Fuck yeah. Outstanding idea

@SecretCFO Can we get a Secret CDM newsletter going on the side? ⚽️

I think Rodri is the best deep lying midfielder I’ve seen since Lothar Matthaus

@SteveWiesnerSMB They are good at computers … that’s it.

@SecretCFO I got slammed a couple of years ago when I asked why everyone thinks the guy's the second coming... So many Silicon Valley types who 'speak from first principles' without speaking from first principles, who hold themselves out as philosopher kings when they're neither...

@HighyieldHarry Oh really?

@SecretCFO I’m just realizing now it’s an old interview too lmfao

@chrisbest @pangram @Substack This is a wonderful development, and maybe even makes it worth my time posting on Substack...

We built the ability to do a @pangram scan into the @Substack app, because we’re sick of slop and we don’t want substack to turn into LinkedIn

@bclougheed yes he was incredible. And sad how it ended. Although the film was funny

@SecretCFO Keane singlehandedly dragged Ireland to the 2002 World Cup, knocking out the Netherlands in the process. I've never seen anything like it. He ran the show in every qualification match. Would love to see how Rodri would get on in an average team, but we probably never will.

@ArtCfartsy_0 all fair shouts. definitely in the convo.

@SecretCFO Yeah I came to say Busquets. But agree with your take that it's difficult to be bad in that Barca squad. Kroos, Pirlo and late-career Scholes get honourable mentions for me too

@MrNoveltyGame @investarchitect i agree 100%

@SecretCFO @investarchitect Pair Busquets with Olmo and Ruiz and Spain is not winning this year. Pair Rodri with Xavi & Iniesta and Spain wins everything.

this is the name i was waiting for : ) one of my fav ever players. A legend. Watched him play live many many times. That performance against Juventus in 1999 will live deep in my heart forever. But Rodri has gone clear in my opinion with what he has done in the last 3 years. It doesn't make me happy, but I do think it's true.

@SecretCFO Roy Keane