VerucaSalty

@PatinkinMandy MANDY FING PATINKIN LIKED MY TWEET. I AM MOSTLY DEAD 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

@peter_froelich @JoshReynolds24 I’m crying

In case you missed it last night: Angels outfielder Jo Adell robbed 3 (no, it’s not a typo) home runs last night… 3!!!! Each one was better than the last. This has to be the first time it’s ever happened & might be the last… Legitimately unbelievable!

@hell_line0 Got the “what about the men” crowd fired up with this one 😏😏🙄🙄

If a man’s testosterone dropped to menopausal levels overnight...He’d be hospitalized. But when a woman loses her progesterone, estrogen, and testosterone, has a sluggish thyroid & insulin resistance? She’s told to go vegan, do more cardio & take magnesium. Meanwhile, her metabolism tanks, joints ache, and brain fog sets in. This isn’t wellness. It’s medical gaslighting.

@KasperStats @idletexan @wbridgefa Damn Kasper….why the stray?

@idletexan @wbridgefa let me guess... Phillies fan?

my change to make baseball weirder would be: when the bases are empty, the batter can decide to run them counterclockwise OR clockwise. that order then stays in place until the bases clear again

@firelilyluke Can’t believe he got hot

god made sidney crosby a hockey player instead of a baseball player cause she knew we couldn’t handle sidney crosby’s ass in baseball pants in high definition 162 times a year

@RealMamaEagle I’m upset

Why is the bunny so scary? 😳

@carriesnotscary 💀

Diva down…

@Justice_099 @Iamivy05 Here’s your Elon penny, you cunt

@Iamivy05 ??? You paid for your child to be in daycare because you couldn't be home with them and then took a day off to visit them at the daycare you are paying for?

when my 4-year-old’s daycare held a “lunch with mom” event, every single mom showed up. we all have other jobs, which is why our kids are in daycare. but we took off work or found a way to get there in the middle of the day. now, they’re doing an event for the dads … at 6:30 in the evening. it’s a small example, but the double standards are real.

@tdarkhorse4 @anactualwalnut She is very loved, comes from a household that provides stability, prioritizes family, self care, rest, health, fun, travel, and experiences. We work hard, take care of each other and genuinely enjoy each others company. Sad for you that you equate growth with such negativity

@tdarkhorse4 @anactualwalnut Jesus Christ what a stretch, I hope you warmed up first. Imagine calling that the bare minimum- when thousands of kids are drowning in student loans. I can count on 1 hand the # of times she was screamed at, and we’ve encouraged and supported every decision.

I keep seeing posts about how out of touch boomers are with the reality of being a young person trying to navigate today’s world and I remembered when I was 22 years old fresh out of college and my only work experience was waitressing & being a barista, my mom was asking how the job hunt (for a big kid job in my degree field) was going and we discussed open positions I saw and she asked why I hadn’t considered applying to be the museum curator for the US Holocaust Memorial Museum in DC. Me, a 22 year old freshly graduated barista with a BA in poli sci. I was like mom you do realize I qualify for like next to nothing right? Especially THAT?? And she was very annoyed I wasn’t being a go getter

@mrmckee Hes obsessed with “privacy”…no one cares that much

My guess is Tiger seeks no actual treatment & just hides out on an island or in Dubai for a few weeks and will continue to play golf. This dude was fully prepared to show up to Augusta next week & play (regardless of his arrest) until Fred Ridley likely put the kibosh on that.

@britttlifts @dhwanisaraiya_ champs tshirt

Guys I meet Jalen next week, wtf do I wear (pictures are involved) 😂😭

THE BITCHES LOVE WHOOOO???

@trillary_banks_ @HotGirlJessie_ Pls 💀🤣

How young is too young for deodorant because my 5 year old smell like white castle

@richmondie @anactualwalnut She works 11-4 or 4-10 3x a week as a server lol she’s not doing “shift work” or hard labor that requires 12 hours of recovery sleep

@TeamVeruca @anactualwalnut Perhaps you'd like to underline for people that those who work shifts need to sleep in the day? It took me two years after I retired to recover.

@KiKiBrouwer1 @girlsreallyrule It’s the in between, princess.

@girlsreallyrule As a menpopausal gen x woman i think you younger woman giving it to much attention. So everything uncomfortable is perimenopause? Well, after 35 years of fucking periods menopause is freedom at last to me. Everything you give attention to will grow positive and negative.

So I was googling all of the symptoms of peri-menopause and let me just save you some time...EVERY bad symptom is listed except lock jaw. Wait. I just found a list with lock jaw.

Congrats, and ima let you finish, but two consecutive Popes have said this guy is bad at Catholicism. That’s a CRAZY batting average for a new Catholic.

@jessakah_ Mr Softee offers a sprinkle sundae. I highly recommend

I want to put my mouth directly under the jimmies dispenser at CBP like I’m being waterboarded.

@HQNewsNow “I don’t believe in building libraries or museums.” - the dumbest person you’ve ever fucking met