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This is what dealing with stress and grief looks like.
Between the ages of 21 and 29 I have lived a life I did not expect or frankly want. The peak being the death of my dad.
In 2018, I was fresh off magic mushrooms, listening to Joe Rogan everyday (peak show era), motivated, lost weight I gained post high school and moved to LA. My weight was around 180 LBS.
Fast forward to covid, chaos, survival jobs, my dads diagnosis in 2023, then his death in 2024. I believe I went through a spiritual upgrade in this time, but my mental and physical self continued to suffer.
In 2026, weighing in at 210 LBS, no dad, no money, no pillow, no blanket. I see what needs to change. Luckily I have a strong physical and spiritual base and am capable to changing.
My activity levels drastically went down while my dad had cancer. Even more so after he passed. I would justify no gym and barley exert myself when I got there. Maybe that's called depression, idk. I'm posting this for the journey and for anyone who is in a similar situation. There is a lot of masculine talk about what I takes to be a man, I'm telling you this is what it looks like. Be honest with yourself, evaluate where you are, move forward with a plan to succeed. That's what I'm doing.
In a culture of looksmaxxing and plastic surgery, I seek to be the healthiest, highest, and best version of myself.
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