Fiolakemi

@_agneeess Plantain 😒😏

Wanted to make pancakes, but clearly this flour had other plans😔😭😭

@OtPersimmon It goes like mad

Amala and Egusi?? R u okay?? It cannot go.

@MEnigmati @ThisIsAdemuyiwa Oh my goodness 😳

@ThisIsAdemuyiwa Ba O ba ni, kobaje (it is fermented not spoilt)

What is the yoruba word for fermentation? NB: Yorubas eat a lot of fermented foods which means our ancestors were brilliant scientists in their own way.

@unknownuzernam @Lifeof_AG01 Which kid pls? 🤔

@Lifeof_AG01 😂😂😂 until a woman kills your kid without telling you... Cause apparently it's your responsibility if she chooses to keep the baby, u no really get sense o

Ask the ladies; it's their body.

@Phatbabeluuu Omo, I weak 😭

Chai So sad

@Lifeof_AG01 Till now, its still what I think 😂😂

My dumb ass used to think “making love” meant having sex in slow motion. 😭🥴

@shark2last @Teephirm @IdrisAOni1 @9iceofficial What is Satan?

It is rather unfortunate to the extent that many of the so called Alfas that I grew up with in the hood, practice iṣẹṣe instead of standing firm on Tawhid. Some of them go as far as offering sacrifices to Satan and all sorts. They cause confusion for many people. And Allah knows best.

If @9iceofficial had simply embraced his Ifa tradition and left it at that, it would have been far better for him. However, venturing into commentary on the Prophet Muhammad’s marriage and attempting to use it to attack the Qur’ān only exposed a profound level of ignorance on the subject. Trying to undermine Islam in order to elevate his traditional religion is not only misguided but a weak approach that can only resonate with those equally uninformed. The Prophet’s marriages have been thoroughly explained and contextualized by scholars for centuries, there is no confusion for those who seek understanding with sincerity. Muslims also do not perform Hajj to “lick a rock”; such caricatures reveal a shallow grasp of Islamic rites and history. Everyone is free to choose their path. But intellectual honesty demands that one speaks from knowledge, not from emotion or ignorance or the desire to promote one faith by disparaging another. May Allah guide us all to what is true and best. Āmīn.

@tshianki The human heart is so dark, just quit that friendship and focus on your self, decanter her.

My friend just bought herself a house but when I buy lunch I buy for the both of us.

@NaijjaQueen Fall as how na, where will it fall to?😭

Waittt! Your vagina can fall out of your body when you’re pregnant???😭😭😭😭 This pregnant woman’s vagina fell out of her body???

@iszabel_lah @jbmillenial Oh my.

@jbmillenial I have a neighbor’s child going through psychosis right now because they won’t let him keep his hair and did the same to him. He’s been having a mental breakdown for about 2 weeks now, in and out of hospital. I detest parents with high-handedness.

“My son doesn’t come home anymore since he went for NYSC, I don’t know what we did”

@osaze_omo @tomisin_ms 😂😂😂

@tomisin_ms Lions kill!!! they don’t “throw” cubs into the river. It’s not Nollywood

He’s trying to mount her while her baby is drowning, and she’s trying to save him. Reminds me of that video of a husband trying to cuddle up to his wife while she was breastfeeding. Men are really something across all species.

@Hisabhkaro @DuskJohn1 H mmmm

@DuskJohn1 If the product is free, you are not the customer. You are the product. Always has been.

How does a free apps like WhatsApp that has over 3 billion users worldwide make money ?

@FadaChristmas_ @UdihirinwaC @TheHabaneroChef 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🥺🥺🥺🤣

@UdihirinwaC @TheHabaneroChef This mentality will harm you in ways unimaginable. The consequences of cheating is not the same for both genders, this is not to discourage you. Experience is the best teacher.

Told me he was broke, I went home collected pocket money, used it to buy foodstuff and cooked for this clown, only to see on his phone that he was buying hair for babes. I didn’t say anything, over the next couple of weeks I deleted all my pictures and every trace of myself off his phone and laptop. He went for NYSC and I blocked him, it was like rapture. He came back, came to my house, I told the maid I will break her head if she opens the door for him.

@dranthoniaeddo Like, you mean men slept with a monkey????? Like, had sex with it and paid???

Have you ever heard of the darkest chapter of prostitution in Indonesia? Its victim wasn't human, but an orangutan named Pony. > Born around 1996, Pony was taken from her mother when she was still a baby and ended up enslaved in a brothel in Kereng Pangi Village, Central Kalimantan. > Tragically, she was forced into sex work to satisfy the lust of local palm oil workers, at an extremely low rate of just around Rp35,000 to Rp38,000 per session. > As the "main star," Pony was forced to serve many customers multiple times a day without respite, making her the brothel owner's biggest money-making machine. > Pony was chained to a filthy mattress, and all her fur was shaved off every two days to expose her skin, leaving her covered in infected wounds and mosquito bites. > She was made to wear lipstick, perfume, jewelry, and cruelly trained to flirt; her body would reflexively sway her hips every time a man passed by her room. > Ironically, because she was seen as exotic (a novelty), Pony was far more popular and often chosen by customers over the human female sex workers in the same place. > Her rescue in February 2003 was highly dramatic; BOSF and the authorities had to deploy 35 armed personnel because the brothel owner fiercely resisted to protect their "talisman." > Now, Pony has successfully regained her natural instincts and lives freely in the wild habitat of Borneo, serving as a living witness to the grim exploitation of wildlife and a symbol of conservation success.

@iamphatey @Chee_derah_ It's strange that you don't find this weird 😂😂😂 it's so funny 😁 😂 😀

@Chee_derah_ As a Tiv guy, it's strange that people find this weird😂

This picture reminds me of one of my roommates in the hostel back in the day. He is a Tiv indigene—the first I’ve ever known. ​After our lectures, he told me he would prepare "swallow" for us to eat. I was happy because I didn't have the strength to cook after such long classes. When we got back to the room, he made eba and dished out pieces of meat onto a separate plate. I was about to go and wash my clothes, thinking he was still preparing the soup, only for him to tell me, "Food don ready." I said okay and followed him to his corner. ​Lo and behold, eba and meat were all this guy had prepared for us to eat! I asked him what kind of food this was, and he said it is a delicacy from his place. After two boluses of this dish, I couldn't continue. ​I appreciated him, but I ended up making spaghetti for myself. 😂

@_thatbeadchef @Chee_derah_ 😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

@Chee_derah_ How dem dey take chop am? You put garri for mouth, then bite meat?

@RealWashedGamer @zionszzn

@zionszzn Supposedly there’s some guy that lifted so much it kept going & going up in weights until nothing in the gym was heavy enough so he had to go outside & keep finding heavier & heavier stuff to lift & it’s been awhile since anyone’s seen him but last I heard he’s lifting a planet

this weightlifting thing, so you’ll just be increasing the weight and going higher and higher till you carry car or what

@mysteriouseyess Have u tried bicycle

Turning 33 and I can’t even get myself ordinary power bike. Nigeria, I curse you 😭

@Adasomma1 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Abeg, no laugh o... Because if you laugh, I will block you😭 So this morning, I was on my way to work, but I left early to deliver something to someone. As I passed the gate of the place, I saw a madman o… completely naked. But I didn't pay attention, I just minded my business. I went in, delivered what I came for, and left. Now, as I was walking to where I would enter a bus to my destination, this walk should be like 5-10 minutes. I was just walking majestically, feeling myself, not knowing that this same madman had been following me all along😭 It was one guy across the road that called my attention. I looked at him, and he was pointing behind me, like I should check my back. I turned… Omo. I saw the madman right behind me, holding his thing with his right hand, pointing it towards me😭 and with his left hand, he was pointing at my yash… his eyes fixed on my yash like say na target😭 This man followed me like that for a complete 10 minutes while I was just walking peacefully and no one told me all those time😩 You should have seen the way I threw my bag! I didn't even drop it, I launched it😭 and I ran! I didn't even know whether motor was coming or not. Omo… I almost run enter another state this morning😭

@ts_thandi6189 @treazyblaq Face card so lethal, I almost liked a hate tweet 😒 😑

@treazyblaq Ugly bitch with a falter on, no he was killed by your brothers that comes into our country illegally.

Did you know? If Lucky Dube was white, he’d probably still be alive today. He was killed in 2007 by jobless, lazy South Africans who broke into his home to loot and steal, all because they mistook him for a Nigerian. That alone tells you everything: their men are such massive losers that even their most successful sons get mistaken for foreigners. That’s how low the bar is. Xenophobia from Sad Africows didn’t start yesterday. They murdered one of the best talents their country ever produced. That alone tells you everything you need to know about them. They lack accountability and are allergic to progress. Any successful man, Nigerian, other Black, or even one of their own, becomes a threat. Your success reminds them of their failures, so they’d rather take you out than face the mirror. Blaming others for their incompetence is easier than admitting they are the problem.