A Starmer

@Crizzy8822 @Strettyupper @jackhardwick93 They look absolutely ridiculous, not the remotest bit funny, like a load of failed drama students showing off. The only people impressed are other xr idiots, everyone else is laughing at them (not with them). Where do they find the time? Jobless?

@a_starmer @Strettyupper @jackhardwick93 It's obviously for a laugh to demonstrate a serious point

Wow. Just wow.

@piersmorgan When are you due to play WBA under 15’s again?

Diabolical.

@ReaperMan101078 @anon_opin Who does M&S play for, I don't recognise the kit!🤷‍♂️

@anon_opin I completely agree, people who wear Star Wars merch should have some self-respect & dress like grown-ups.

Wearing Star Wars merch when you're in your 40s, because you saw some films you liked when you were little, is deeply sad. It's like walking around with a plastic fire helmet on your head because a fire engine came to your school 35 years ago.

@toadmeister She's got nice tits.

The risk COVID poses to children is virtually zero and being vaccinated doesn’t meant they won’t catch it and pass it on. So why expose them to unnecessary risk? mol.im/a/9934275

@piersmorgan @Cristiano Just need Kevin Keegan as manager now! Cavani, CR7 & Greenwood up front, Fernandes & Pogba in midfield and some other players making up the numbers!

BREAKING: It’s official - the great ⁦Cristiano Ronaldo⁩ is rejoining Manchester United. Brilliant to see the 🐐 back in the Premier League. Congrats & welcome back my friend @cristiano 👍👏👏👏

@fesshole You do realise that's not a punishment?

I used to house share with 4 male student doctors, I really hated one of them so I used his cucumber that was in the fridge to as a dildo then put it back in the fridge.

@jackhardwick93 Grown man in dungarees should be warning enough!

@Strettyupper @jackhardwick93 And not doing it for a laugh, they're deadly serious!!🤷‍♂️🤦‍♂️

@jackhardwick93 Adults. Let that sink in for a moment whilst watching this. These are adults. Wow.

@JuliaHB1 Your mate explains it for you. I normally defend you but you're way off the mark with this one.

@piersmorgan @GMB @Ofcom Treason! Wish I could say been nice knowing you!!

On the subject of my exit from @GMB - it can’t be long before @Ofcom rules on the most complained about moment in UK TV history: my refusal to believe Princess Pinocchio. She personally complained to the regulator & the CEO of ITV. Should be a fascinating verdict. 🧐

@piersmorgan @benstokes38 He'd be in the team now but according to your levels he quit, remember? Don't even think about citing a poorly finger.

‘What an innings. What a cricketer.’ I watch highlights of this scintillating innings at least twice a week, every week. It’s a soul-stirring mood enchancer of epic, Biblical proportions. Come back soon @benstokes38 - we miss you.

@anon_opin Music is definitely one thing that is subjective. I, for one, like 2 maybe 3 of their songs and think the rest all sound like the same dreary shite.

The Beatles are the only band in history who don't have a single bad song. Even their bad songs are technically excellent.

@MayorofLondon @theartofldn Bet the cycle lanes were easy to paint, what with them being empty! How are the knife crime figures?

What happens when you give five world-leading artists the chance to transform Piccadilly Circus? The spectacular Piccadilly Art Takeover is one of the most colourful public displays of art our capital has ever seen. It ends on 31 August—check it out this week! #LetsDoLondon

@fesshole Floodgates are gonna open over that typo, at least that's what they'll end up like!

I've recently sold my house and temporarily lived with my parents. I've now moved into my new house and can't find my sex toys. I've unpacked everything and all I remember is that I packed them in a place where only I would find them but I can't. I love in constant fear.

@OldHemp @Iromg Are you on the edge of a cliff?😂

One of my favourites. Chicken Milanese with spaghetti pomodoro. Delicious 🍷

@anon_opin And you get to see tits!👍

Naked Attraction is actually a really good show. It promotes body positivity. There's all sorts of beautiful shapes and sizes on display. These people are brave for actually putting themselves out there. Fair play.

@fesshole 'created by me shooting my spooge up their mothers' blurt' That's me off to the tattooist tomorrow!

I often go into my children's bedroom at night to watch them sleep. As I gaze down on my beautiful sleeping angels I reflect on the miracle of life, and how amazing it is these wonderful human beings were created by me shooting my spooge up their mothers' blurt.

@Chesterkop @piersmorgan Thought those were her finger tips for a minute, f*****g long arms to reach around that unit!

Preposterous that he ever got it in the first place, given his deadly mismanagement of NY nursing homes.

@xryouthuk Oh please press the accelerator as hard as you can!

this is not something to miss! come and find us ❤️😎

LEICESTER SQUARE RIGHT NOW!! lots of dancing and a massive pink table, let’s bring the climate crisis to the table and #ActNow to #DemandTheImpossible #XRYouth