calum mackenzie

......and proud.

Oh!

BREAKING: A leaked memo from Fox News reveals that the network's interviewers regularly use Vicks VapoRub under their noses when interviewing Donald Trump because he smells like, as one Fox producer described it, “roast beef diarrhea.”

Best. Reply. Ever.

Hey MAGAts, yes we're being condescending. Yes, that means we're talking down to you.

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? YOU WERE THE PRESIDENT ON JANUARY 6TH

Says the geezer who bought a farm to dodge tax

Hasan reads out Elon Musk's texts sent to Ashley St. Claire right before the 2024 election. "Tomorrow we unleash the anomaly in the matrix..this is not something on the chess board so they will be quite surprised "lasers from space"... I have over 10,000 lasers in space right now"

GREAT NEWS! AN AGREEMENT WITH IRAN HAS BEEN LARGELY NEGOTIATED. ALL THAT'S LEFT IS FOR DONALD TRUMP TO WORK OUT THE PREMISE OF THE CONCEPT OF THE GENERAL NOTION OF THE LOOSE INTERPRETATION OF THE PLAN. IT SHOULD BE FINALIZED ON THURSDAY, 2038.

Dear Republicans...

@RushDoshi It’s Donald Trump’s approach to our adversaries. They can do whatever the fuck they want. To anyone they want.

Total Capitulation. Total Failure.

Yes, he is stupid enough to say this. (Satire)

Lord Sugar says Boris Johnson and Michael Gove should be 'in jail' for 'lies' they told about Brexit. In an interview with the Sunday Times, the businessman said Brexit was the 'worst thing I have experienced in business.'

. The PM Keir Starmer is right to call for an urgent review of non-custodial sentences for boys who planned the rape of two girls, and broadcast video of their offences online. Sentences have to act as a deterrent to such vile crimes! #r4today #bbcbreakfast #GMB #C4News #VAWG .

HOLY CRAP Trump actually accomplished a miracle. Here is what he got out of Iran: - Reduce its stockpile of enriched uranium by about 98% - Limit uranium enrichment to 3.67% purity (far below weapons-grade) - Cut the number of installed centrifuges by roughly two-thirds - Only enrich uranium at one declared site (Natanz) - Stop enrichment activities at Fordow and convert it into a research facility - Redesign the Arak heavy-water reactor so it could not easily produce weapons-grade plutonium - Ship out or dilute excess enriched uranium Allow extensive inspections by the International Atomic Energy Agency (IAEA) Permit continuous monitoring of nuclear facilities and supply chains - Accept “snap” inspections under expanded monitoring rules - Avoid building new heavy-water reactors for years - Stay within strict limits on uranium stockpile size and centrifuge development for set periods ranging from 10–25 years Ooops, sorry! That was the JCPOA that Obama signed with Iran, only to have him tear it up, kill 140 kids, get hundreds of Americans injured, 13 killed, and gas prices to surge 50%.

“Fuck Trump” is less a slogan than a national customer review.

And then he said, "The Russians hacked my phone, so the illegal bung doesn't count." 🐢💨