Lisa W

@London_W4 £35.60

And now I’m food shopping. I couldn’t be bothered to walk all the way to Fortnum’s today, so I’ve come to Marks and Spencer. To win a massive cash prize, it’s guess the price of my food shop? Everything you see in this photo. (To clarify: I completely lied about the cash prize)

@InsideLucysHead @Drennan62 one for you 😂

A woman was 3 months pregnant when she fell into a deep coma and woke up after 10 months... The woman asked the doctor about her baby. Doctor: 'You had twins, a boy and a girl. They’re both fine. And, your brother named them for you.' Woman: 'No, No, No! Not my brother. He’s an idiot! What did he name the girl?' Doctor: 'Denise.' Woman: 'Ohh, that’s actually a nice name. What about the boy?' Doctor: Deeply sighs, 'Denephew'.

@JimmyBarnes One of my all time fave songs I'm meant to be seeing Diesel at the end of April, but had to cancel my flight to Oz (I'm in the UK) because of everything going on. Absolutely gutted 😭

Diesel got up with us last night for ‘Still Got a Long Way to Go’. He wrote this song for me and we recorded it for ‘Flesh and Wood’ in 1993. It was great to do it with the Jane Barnes Band at the Bowral Bowling club. Thanks EJ for jumping up too. See you all tomorrow at the Centennial Winery for the Working Class Man 40th Anniversary show. @MahaliaBarnes @iamjackiebarnes @ejie

@ATRightMovies Terms of Endearment or Marley and Me. Cry like a baby every time.

@JaneFallon @CatSteadman You don't look cross-eyed, you look amazing after just having an op! I had a skin cancer removed from my face in Jan and didn't get out of bed for 2 days! Get plenty of rest and hope you feel better soon ❤️

So… I had my op today. I’m feeling remarkably fine, which is possibly the drugs & that might also explain why I’m cross eyed in pic 4). I had quite a lovely couple of hours drinking tea & reading the brilliant @CatSteadman ‘s new one (more on that later

@Matt_Pinner Conchigle!

You have to name him the last thing you ate

@luxemiaa I had something similar a while back. The woman made such a scene and unfortunately the staff let her. Some people refused to change some people did. Delayed the flight while she carried on. Meanwhile, my husband was sitting up the front with extra legroom and I was at the back🤣

Update: the flight is running late and the family was one of the last to board. When the dad started asking around for swaps the FA quickly caught on. They shut him down ASAP, the youngest of the kids was able to sit with a grandparent.

This woman on Instagram shared: I’m at the airport and there’s a family of 8 people on my flight with small children, I just overheard the dad say, “All of our seats are all over the place, no one is close to each other because I didn’t want to pay extra for assigned seats. We’ll switch around when we get on the plane.” Suffice it to say, I hate them....

@mattforde Electric!

What. An. Atmosphere.

@DeborahMeaden At 5 or 6 most people start to understand the consequences of not telling the truth!

The trouble with telling fibs is you need a massive spreadsheet to keep track of all the angles they affect… I have always found it easier to just stick with the truth… actually not always… since I was around 5 or 6.

@alanweston @London_W4 I was thinking the same, my favourite is a nice Aussie cab sav from Aldi for £4.99 ☺️

@London_W4 You could buy three bottles for roughly the same amount at Aldi or Lidl, & you prob wouldn’t notice any significant difference in the quality.

You’ve gotta laugh haven’t you. I popped into this very upmarket hotel/wine bar in Soho because I needed a toilet. As I walked in, one of the very lovely waitresses greeted me and I was too embarrassed to say I’d only come in for the toilet so now I’m sitting here with all the beautiful people, having a glass of wine. I don’t know how much this wine is, but I’m guessing it’ll be the most expensive penny I’ve ever spent.

@Soddem_Hall @PolitlcsGlobal @russellhoward Yes! I was thinking, why the hell is Russell Howard there? 🤣

@PolitlcsGlobal Is it me or does the Finnish President look like @russellhoward?!

🚨🇬🇧 PICTURED: Finnish President Alexander Stubb takes a selfie with Keir Starmer and Volodymyr Zelenskyy

@PressSec President Trump and consistent don't belong in a sentence together.

There are many false claims in this letter but let me address one specifically: that "Iran posed no imminent threat to our nation."   This is the same false claim that Democrats and some in the liberal media have been repeating over and over.   As President Trump has clearly and explicitly stated, he had strong and compelling evidence that Iran was going to attack the United States first.   This evidence was compiled from many sources and factors. President Trump would never make the decision to deploy military assets against a foreign adversary in a vacuum.   Iran is the world’s leading state sponsor of terrorism. The Iranian regime is evil. It proudly killed Americans, waged war against our country, and openly threatened us all the way up to the launch of Operation Epic Fury.   Iran was aggressively expanding their short-range ballistic missiles to combine with their naval assets to give themselves immunity – meaning they would have a degree of a capabilities that would give them immunity to hold us and the rest of the world hostage.   The regime aimed to use those ballistic missiles as a shield to continue achieving their ultimate goal – nuclear weapons.   The President, through his top negotiators, gave the regime every single possible opportunity to abandon this unacceptable course by permanently giving up their nuclear ambitions in exchange for sanctions relief, free nuclear fuel, and potential economic partnerships with our country.   But they would not say yes to peace because obtaining nuclear weapons was their fundamental goal.   President Trump ultimately made the determination that a joint attack with Israel would greatly reduce the risk to American lives that would come from a first strike by the terrorist Iranian regime and address this imminent threat to America’s national security interests.   All of this led to President Trump arriving at the determination that this military operation was necessary for U.S. national security, which is why he launched the massively successful Operation Epic Fury. The Commander-in-Chief determines what does and does not constitute a threat, because he is the one constitutionally empowered to do so - and because the American people went to the ballot box and entrusted him and him alone to make such final judgments. And finally, the absurd allegation that President Trump made this decision based on the influence of others, even foreign countries, is both insulting and laughable. President Trump has been remarkably consistent and has said for DECADES that Iran can NEVER possess a nuclear weapon. As someone who actually witnesses President Trump’s decision-making process on a daily basis, I can attest to the fact that he is always looking to do what’s in the best interest of the United States of America — period. America First.

@loki_loves_you Thank you for this ❤️

I have too many ugly men on my tl so here's the most beatuful man to ever exist

@NoContextBrits The post above this says, you can put a toilet roll over the lens to make your cat look like the moon. Brian May giving similar vibes

What the Pringles see.

@awesomefringey I wouldn't have seen any of the play! 😍

Sat next to Tom Hiddleston in a theatre tonight. What is life even?!

@LisaMariaCav @fesshole Yes I just saw this today! What a great idea! 😊

@fesshole If you're on insta, look up the page "Empty Chairs", it's a group of people arranging pub nights for people who are lonely/want to meet people, or just fancy a drink and a chat with others in the same position. Meet-ups are all over the country. Also...treat yourself more often

I live alone, have no living family and rarely see any friends. If I ever need to order anything online I wait until the week running up to my birthday or Christmas to make it feel like I'm getting lots of presents.

@holly Oh hi HamHam!

WE DID IT!!! Thank you so so so much, from me and the kitties whose lives you've just changed. And here's your reward... Our newest Merry Moggy, HAMHAM!

If we get to our fundraising goal, I will show you all our newest miracle cat. His name is Hamham, he has two noses, a wobbly head and a hearing deficiency, and he is SO CUTE I COULD SPLODE. Trust me, you want to see this cat! Donate here: gofundme.com/f/three-beauti…

@status_is_down Yes

Facebook is reportedly down for some users currently. Are you one of them? #FacebookDown #Facebook community.designtaxi.com/topic/22862-is…

@holly 😂 brilliant!

@dawns05751 Hahaha no worries 😆 someone came to my house today and told me about the woman with the wobbly cats on Cat Man 😆🤦🏻‍♀️

After MANY requests, I've revived Smol Paul's Instagram. And this picture is 1000% worth the click 😆 instagram.com/p/DT6PqJXiEe7/…