neuro

fuck this place

when a @lastweektonight researcher doesn't understand an entry in @bbcone's programme guide #joinsbbcnews

no, @asda. no! #apostrophefail

During my early 20s I took drugs regularly to try and fit in, now 10 years later I spend my weekends building Lego and watching Sci-Fi films. Far more enjoyable way to spend the time.

I'm 44 and am watching Red Dwarf again as it's back on the BBC. Having watched it through school, university, my 20s and 30s, and now, it's like an old comforting friend. Being in deep space feel quite appealing versus modern life.

At university, I ordered a Nintendo Switch from Amazon, delivered to halls. Reported as not received then took back to John Lewis for vouchers: Spent vouchers in Waitrose on booze. Did this 3 times. I've just started the degree-holder entry programme to be a police constable.

@yayalexisgay @UnionHallNY @wendysteinerlol @dhtoomey @myqkaplan please have a ridiculous amount of props for pronouncing “edinburgh” correctly. like, not even a little bit correctly, but 100% spot on.

NYC! my standup comedy show 'Alexis Gay & Friends' is coming to @UnionHallNY this Sunday, 10/1! I'm performing a 25-minute headliner set following some jokes from my lovely friends @wendysteinerlol, @dhtoomey, and @myqkaplan✨ tix are going fast! ➡️ eventbrite.com/e/alexis-gay-f…

My ex won't move out of the marital home. Fine by me, I've found all his secret pots of money & he has to babysit when I go out on dates. Including ones with his mates.

@AWSSupport i've already spoken to them, thanks, i'm just grumbling 😆

@evilneuro Sorry to hear about your exam! If you're in need of PearsonVue assistance, several options are made available here: go.aws/3ZqNpJq. If you'd like, you can always reach out to our Training & Certification team for additional guidance: go.aws/contact-traini…. 👈 ^LG

couldn't start my @awscloud CLF-C02 exam yesterday due to technical problems; test centre were great, got a case opened with @pearsonvue to sort out a free reschedule. but today, 20 mins on the phone with pearson to then get told i'll get an email later with more details. ooft.

@PearsonVUE @awscloud i won't know if i need more help until i do or don't receive the email you're supposed to be sending me at some point :) my point is that since your system knows i couldn't take the exam (status: delivery failed), why not automatically issue a reschedule token?

@evilneuro @awscloud Hi, if you need more help, please send us a DM with your details so we can investigate and help you.

Supposed to be working from home, once the masturbation is over with, the new repetitive behaviour is endlessly watching 90s sitcoms, guessing if the elder actors are still alive then going down the online rabbithole to find out. Spoiler: they're mostly not.

@MAGAOperator @HarrisonHSmith @BrentLeeSDCIC picture was taken in 1972 when the buildings were still under construction (see the crane?)

@HarrisonHSmith @BrentLeeSDCIC Is he saying this blown-out, sun-facing, photo represents the true interior support structure?? I guess he thinks the floors were all vacant and the exterior walls were paper thin 🤦 He's drawn to reactionary crypticism more than actual facts Actual WTC floors 👇👇

I was a believer of the 9/11 inside job conspiracy theory for 15 years. It was my gateway to the rabbit hole. Thankfully, today, I am now an ex-truther. This picture clearly shows the core of WTC 1&2. This picture is one that no 9/11 conspiracist will show you because it destroys their argument. You can see quite clearly that there would have been no controlled demolitions needed for it to collapse. Do all the mental gymnastics you want, but the truth is simple. A plane flew into each building. The impact, explosion, and fire weakened the core. The weight of the floors above the impact zone buckled the steel. And it all came down. No mystery. No inside job. Stop believing fantasies and wake up!

@SkyHelpTeam so why is the app saying it’s available?

@evilneuro Hello Neuro, thanks for your message. I hope you're well. This will be because it's not available in your area. Alison

@SkyHelpTeam not sure why you’re offering me ultrafast broadband and then only showing me superfast options ☹️

@fesshole i did something similar when starting at a new job years ago, refactored something that took 2 days to run so it ran in 90 minutes instead. the customers hailed me as a hero, but the truth is the previous guy was just incompetent.

A friend of mine has a job normalising data from a lot of different sources. I wrote some software for them to automate it. What took 5 days now takes 30 mins to download and 15 seconds to run. They never told the company, and I havent paid for a drink or meal with them since

I still follow the venue where we held our wedding reception on Facebook, mainly to see if any of the brides marrying there are more attractive than my wife. Nine years later and the answer is no.

“let’s watch the first 20 minutes of a movie, then review it”, said no critic ever. #ahsoka i know the @guardian is happy to let multiple critics have differing opinions, but it’s either “more bad star wars” (@jackseale) or it’s an “intergalactic blast” (@mrpmharrison); which?!

@fesshole this isn't a fess, it's an elevator pitch for a romcom starring reese wetherspoon and ryan sauceling

I was 18 with my mates in Wetherspoons, there was a table of girls just across from us, I fancied one of them and my mate suggested I send a drink, I decided to send some beans, she realised it was me and we got talking, 6 years later we are married, baked beans found me my wife

@marcus51090 @swpinsent @portalrealm

Normal operating conditions for an Oberth