sahaj

fuck it tear down the Statue of Liberty and put Brunson up there

@zhuphilia another talented writer in the mfa to nsa pipeline

now that i've graduated from the mfa, it's time to return to northern virginia & report my findings to my CIA handlers. i visited georgetown today, where they took cute polaroids of me at the cat cafe

.@NYCSanitation I'd like to report a sweep

@ijusgiggled we’re gonna use PDEs for asset pricing cocoa futures 6 months in advance and you’re gonna love it

every branch of applied mathematics is being used to deploy something evil. KILL dynamic pricing. plan routes for national mail services and high-speed rails with it INSTEAD PLS

@peepeepoopoo241 how araki explains jojo stands:

@LinkofSunshine where’s this article from? i would like to read the whole thing

The permanent vibecession is here to stay

which bushwick bar should i use my domain expansion at tonight

@weirdassfishes you become the worm

What are viable career paths/ General life options for someone who is dirt

@dollisheart @yulledias dude what the fuck no way is he being serious

One of them called after 3 years to apologize and another asked to be my cuck

when you turn 23 and have to start looking at the norwood chart

woke up today wanting to threaten violence on diasporoids

@TWlTTERHAVER the man who does hyrox will not provide for you

On the bright side this is a great reason to resolve not to get married to someone until they get a six pack and run a marathon for me. Or at the very least complete a hyrox race.

@sciamchy youre cooking so hard

your future husband is on twitter ranking NBA players by meat size

@sciamchy keep cooking

anyone saying castle needs to cut his hair off to avoid being GRABBED by it is probably racist i’m not elaborating

@ponyexperiments just try to get a 3.3 in college

Becoming an enrolled agent. An electrician. And then an HVAC BLUE COLLAR WHO IS INVESTING IN CRYPTOS. Any thing else? God? Oh? Piano? Yes. please. I beg of you, keep stalkers away from me. I'm turning myself into a human weapon.

@Gudokdu @alsemancher_ it did. thank you. do you have recommendations for visiting seoul? I’m visiting soon

@froglover2003 @alsemancher_ Most of them are just loud because they believe its fashionable. From my experience i reckon youll just have to wait a decade or so before they swing the other way and start raving about your culture again...At least it made a very good, if unintended, punchline for your joke? 😬

every time my white ex gf wanted to scare me she’d threaten to start an interracial couples lifestyle instagram reels account

@Gudokdu @alsemancher_ they arent very nice but one cant do much about preconceived notions

@froglover2003 @alsemancher_ Might be shaming myself horribly if this isnt true for you as well but racists on the internet are awful to indians in particular

@Gudokdu @alsemancher_ How so

@froglover2003 @alsemancher_ Incredible follow up

@KathalBiryani it happens

AM I FUCKING SHADOW BANNED WHY ISNT ANYONE NOTICING MY TWEETS :( 85% of my followers are gay useless retards they should leave I don’t like you

Scrolling twitter and thinking about taking my ribs out lol