Jules Benjamin

My favourite things to say in a Geordie accent… 5. Photocopier 4. Emotional rollercoaster 3. A mere bagatelle 2. Toto 1. Kendo Nagasaki Bonus: Halal Meat (which is how Geordie’s say hello to each other).

@Rainmaker1973 At first I thought this was one of those charts that asks how you like your toast…

Who would you pick to play the next James Bond?

@ExtremeFootbal4 @GAltringham Erm…no.

It's impossible to hate Matt Le Tissier.

@LauraLoomer Yes. Snakes on a plane. Bombs on a plane. Investigative journalists on a plane. People called Laura who should really have been called Karen on a plane. There are many…

Is there anything worse than a crying baby on a plane? I wish parents would control their children. It’s so disruptive. I refuse to believe a baby cries for 10 hours. At some point this is just bad parenting, right?

@Mike_Batt Yes, especially Spring.

Aren’t you tired of the fucking Four Seasons? (The piece, not the hotel chain). It’s not Vivaldi’s fault. It’s great but can’t we give it rest? Oy vey, already.

@prodnose That’s great.

10cc's "The Dean & I" is one of the greatest pop singles of my lifetime. This has just surfaced. Them actually making it. youtube.com/watch?v=ALWM1I…

@edwinhayward More like a Temu Eagle’s Nest, I’d say.

In the future, Mar-a-Lago will be as infamous as Epstein Island is now.

@ShutupLyle I would get straight onto Chesterfield Kings. She won’t be interested in food if she tugs on 40 of those bad boys every day.

My daughter is interested in getting into smoking cigarettes (for weight loss) does anybody have any recommendations for beginner cigarettes that won’t make her cough too much? She hasn’t been taking to the Marlboro Reds. She’s 11

@Rainmaker1973 Chocolate croissant.

You have to name him the last thing you ate

Using only a Gif of AL Pacino where are you mentally???

@GAltringham He’s not even the greatest actor called Tom.

It’s funny as hell that Tom Cruise is probably one of the greatest actors to ever live and no one wants to be a fan of him because his personal life is so fucking weird

@MadelaineLucyH Sounds like normal people getting along with life to me.

My best friend is Muslim, and she has been fasting. I’m not a Muslim, and I don’t. We joke about it. She’s going to a white CoE funeral, and calls me to ask what the norms are and what to wear and say. This summer, I’ll be going to a family wedding with her and asking the same. Because that’s integration. That’s how you build a society that works. We don’t all have to be the same. We just need to have policies that allow for proper mixing and insight.

@Gadget440 @docrussjackson Why is this muppet given any airtime by anyone?

Andrew Tate says he is "very disappointed" in people who left Dubai during the conflict... ... very shortly after this interview, he left Dubai and is currently in Hong Kong.

@Sara_Nordic Asks a woman thrusting her breasts forward and very nearly liberating her foof…

Do men still appreciate a woman who's intelligent and loves to read?

Ok Film X. I got another question for you. What is this person’s greatest performance in film? Steve Martin

@GAltringham Great movie. The Jamie Lee Curtis scenes are just a bonus.

Ok Film X. I got another question for you. Give me your brutally honest opinion on the film below. Whether you love it, hate it or just not too sure. Trading Places (1983) Dir. John Landis

@edwinhayward I would purchase the necessary equipment I need to start my music channel.

Say someone gave you £2,000. What would you spend it on? Simple Rules: 1. Can't pay down debt 2. Can't save it 3. Must spend it within 30 days 4. Other than 1-3, you can do anything

@Cobratate They’re not interested in you, dude.

How do I block all tweets from women?

Your first cinema crush???

Fucking hell…

@apple Why the hell - no matter what I do - can I not disconnect my iPad from my phone’s hotspot? You’d think ‘forget this network’ would suffice, but no.