Justin Umstead

I just published a massive article with over 30 powerful hacks that help accountants work faster, reduce stress, and reclaim their time. Check it out here 👉 accountingheroes.substack.com/p/10x-your-acc…

@cordes_tax Glad your night went smooth! Take your win, but remember one night is one night. It’s a novel situation for your kids, so they are less likely to push back. The problems intensify when you begin to do it every night alone - that’s when they start to test your boundaries. 😅

My wife went out with friends tonight. What’s an acceptable way to tell her the kids took baths, brushed their teeth, and did bedtime routine way easier than when she is here that won’t result in my immediate death?

@Impregnator69 @sjryanwriter @lporiginalg “Of course I’m wrong. Nobody is right 100% of the time. It’s just this one issue that I will always stand my ground on because I’ve done the work. I’ve tested my ideas. I’m simply not open to suggestion. I think you’re looking at it incorrectly.”

@sjryanwriter @lporiginalg If you face a narc with average intelligence they will know how to mask to a degree.

@EternalPolk @BirawiBoi @shannonrwatts You need people like us who can separate heart from brains and suggest actual solutions - otherwise you’d be focusing resources everywhere but where they matter. You’re not focused on fixing the problem, you’re focused on wallowing in it.

@justinjots @BirawiBoi @shannonrwatts Yall are fucked up in your thinking

@EternalPolk @BirawiBoi @shannonrwatts Yes, both matter. It matters that those groups exist and we need to stop it. But it’s also important to understand the scope of the problem because it helps us shape our perception of the society we live in and the depth of the problem.

@BirawiBoi @shannonrwatts Does it matter how many men? Or does it matter that any number of men have created a thread to discuss how to drug and rape women without detection? Like WTF are we talking about here?

@TheEdman @newstart_2024 I agree, why would you let some talk piece UNDERCUT your achievement?!? Regardless of what you think of the shirt, a person like that should want to focus attention on their win, not for some random, viral shirt.

@newstart_2024 But also why would you wear a fucking shirt like that right after you just LANDED A SATELLITE ON A COMET!

The guy just landed a spacecraft on a comet — one of the most impressive scientific achievements in years. His reward? A public struggle session because his bowling shirt had scantily clad women on it. Helen Andrews points out the quiet cost of institutional feminization: HR departments now hunt down any maverick personality and stamp it out. We’re losing innovators we’ll never even know about, all because someone focused on the shirt instead of the comet. This is how wokeness actually works. Have you seen real excellence get punished for something trivial like this?

@ywomendeservles “Truly worth keeping” is the triggering phrase here. It assumes that if a man had just been more or done more then the woman would still be around. But the fact is you can never control the thoughts, feelings, or actions of another person no matter what you do.

@pats_con @LibertyCappy All ya’ll are electricity, plumbing, and temperature control-dependent. You ain’t that hard. 😂 There were dozens of older generations that got by without any of that.

@LibertyCappy Only generation that is tech savvy without being tech dependent. We were there from the start. Take it all away and we'll be fine. Can't say the same about subsequent Phone Zombie Generations.

Once you realize it

@stillbounty @CollinRugg $26 million spent the right way could build you one heck of a legacy ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

@CollinRugg $26M on the table and they still said no. Not everything is for sale; some people still choose land, legacy, and purpose over a big payout.

NEW: Kentucky family rejects $26 million offer to convert part of their farm into a data center despite the offer being about 10 times the going rate for farmland in the area. "If it's my way, I'll stay and hold and feed a nation. 26 million doesn't mean anything." "As long as I'm on this land, as long as it's feeding me, as long as it's taking care of me, there's nothing that can destroy me if I've got this land." Video: Local 12 WKRC

@stats_feed This seems like a hard thing to measure. Some people leave relationships with clear evidence it was a negative experience. The timeline for those people, and for people who mindfully process grief, would seem to be much faster than the average experience.

💔A new study investigated how long it takes to get over an ex-partner. On average, it took about 4.18 years for the emotional attachment to an ex-partner to be halfway dissolved. For the typical person, the bond to an ex completely faded away around 8 years but for some it takes longer. (Social Psychological and Personality Science (Chong and Fraley, 2025)

@thechosenberg I’ve already decided I’m giving myself about a month to relax after retirement and then I’m going straight into volunteering as close to full time as I can. Some people are just built to *do*. Peace feels like death.

>Guy microdoses retirement >Realizes he never developed a personality outside work

@DearS_o_n Restraint. The power of choice to do a thing, and then mindfully choosing not to do it when it doesn’t serve your long-term self interest.

What’s a “boring” skill that secretly gives a man huge advantage in life?

@ThatEricAlper I’ve never been with a woman who didn’t eventually circle back around to try to rekindle something with me. Just because she has options doesn’t mean she has GOOD options.

@FreckledLiberty It’s not hard. It’s just good habits and boring, sustainable effort.

men, is this true?

@KILLTOPARTY Women pick up on desperate energy. As a dude, you shouldn’t emotionally invest in any outcome. If you lean forward they will pull away. If you lean back, and they are interested, they will chase you.

Why can’t he get a second date?

@Crypto_d0c @TinFoilPill @DesireeAmerica4 The scary thing is that limited wire taps on criminals turned into widespread wire taps on all Americans (via NSA). That was alarming, but most people were protected because wire-tapping everyone created too much volume to monitor. But now AI can monitor volume in bulk…

@justinjots @TinFoilPill @DesireeAmerica4 Yea i don’t disagree. I value privacy and freedom of speech above almost anything. We are living in crazy times.

EVER WONDER WHAT HAPPENED TO THE TEACHER ARRESTED BY SNAPCHAT'S AI? ​Because she jokingly typed the word "shoot" in a private snap to a friend, Snapchat flagged her account and sent the message directly to the FBI. The FBI then had a local sheriff's Deputy show up at her school. ​Well, here is what eventually happened. ​She was physically pulled out of her elementary school and taken straight to the Tazewell County Jail, where she was officially booked for disorderly conduct. ​After interrogating her, the deputies actually admitted on the record that she made the comment purely out of "exasperation." They confirmed she had absolutely zero intent to harm anyone and was never a threat to the school. ​But even though the cops admitted she wasn't a danger and no formal charges were ever filed, her career still took a massive hit. The school district superintendent sent a letter to parents terminating her entirely, stating she would not be allowed to return to finish her assignment. ​If a regular person ruined someone's career with a false police report, they would be sued into oblivion. So when exactly does Snapchat get held accountable for this? 🤷🏼‍♀️

@Crypto_d0c @TinFoilPill @DesireeAmerica4 Yes sir, and I’m not defending the air-headed thing the teacher said by any means. I’m just weaving this story into a bigger conversation about privacy - where should the line be drawn? It definitely puts surveillance powers in the government’s hands that could be abused.

@justinjots @TinFoilPill @DesireeAmerica4 do you have kids?

@Crypto_d0c @TinFoilPill @DesireeAmerica4 Someday you will type something completely innocent and before you hit “Send” you’ll ask yourself if it’s safe to send it even though you know AI might interpret it the wrong way. That, my friend, is the feeling of your rights slipping away.

@TinFoilPill @DesireeAmerica4 I'm content where I am. I will just not say I'm going to kill a child on social media

@NoPoliSolutions @PriceTaerl789 @JimChuong Why would you make a value judgement about someone you didn’t even know? You have no clue what his situation is, or what he’s been through. 🤨

@PriceTaerl789 @JimChuong You really failed in life if you don't even have 2k.

After you win $100m 1. Call everybody you know, ask them to give you $2,000 for an emergency, and tell them that you don’t know if you can pay them back. 2. Afterwards, tell everybody that you won the lottery.

@ronmaest3 @sirmarz1985 @dom_lucre I don’t know if I’d say he necessarily “deserves it,” but he’s definitely setting himself up to get hurt. He is partially responsible for whatever happens next.

@sirmarz1985 @dom_lucre He’d deserve it.

🔥🚨DEVELOPING: A man on IG is going viral after he finally started dating his high school crush after being in the friend zone for 13 years. The 28-year-old woman who now has 5 kids, including a newborn started poking fun at people who told her she would never find a man with a 3 week old baby.

@sasha_banichek @KILLTOPARTY There’s no shame in being “naive.” It means you have a good heart and you believe in the best in people. 😅 I’ve also pursued people who weren’t aligned.

@justinjots @KILLTOPARTY You aren’t kidding! I’ve been so naive about it and that is why I’m still a little naive, but also rigid.

The girl you’re with needs to know you have multiple options