Tony Kam

I accidentally broke my brain reading about Nobel Prize winners last month. There's this thing called "Janusian thinking" that basically explains why some people's minds work like magic while the rest of us think in straight lines. Named after Janus, the Roman god with two faces pointing opposite directions. The psychologist who discovered it, Albert Rothenberg, was trying to figure out what made breakthrough thinkers different. He interviewed dozens of Nobel laureates, major artists, revolutionary scientists. What he found sounds impossible. These people can hold two different ideas in their mind at the same time. They can explore both without switching back and forth or forcing a quick comparison. They can consider “yes” and “no” to the same question simultaneously and stay clear-headed. Einstein too talked about this when he described his relativity breakthrough. He was imagining riding alongside a beam of light while also standing perfectly still. Both perspectives at once. Mozart said he could hear an entire symphony "all at once," every note, every contradiction, every resolution happening in a single moment of awareness. Your average person's mind works like a courtroom. Evidence comes in, you weigh it, you reach a verdict. Case closed. But Janusian minds work more like... I don't know, like a quantum computer that can process multiple realities simultaneously until something new emerges from the overlap. I've started noticing it in conversations. When someone can genuinely see both sides of something without needing to pick one, it drives people nuts. They want you to land somewhere definite. The ability to live in that tension space reads as wishy-washy or indecisive. Most creative advice tells you to "think outside the box." But Janusian thinking is weirder than that. It's being inside and outside the box at the same time. It's thinking the box exists and doesn't exist simultaneously. Which explains why truly creative people seem slightly unhinged. They think they're choosing between realities. But, they're inhabiting multiple realities at once, mining the contradictions for insights the rest of us never see. Sadly, most of us have trained ourselves out of this ability. We've learned that holding contradictions feels unstable, so we rush toward resolution. We've been taught that changing your mind means you were wrong before, so we defend positions instead of exploring them. But the people changing the world have kept that childlike ability to hold impossible thoughts without needing them to make sense immediately. We just need to live in the questions everyone else is too scared to ask.

I ran a 35-billion parameter AI agent on a $600 Mac mini. Specs: M4 Mac-Mini 16GB RAM The model doesn't fit in RAM. It pages from the SSD at 30 tokens/second. On NVIDIA, the same paging gives you 1.6 tok/s. Apple Silicon gives you 30. That's 18.6x faster. No cloud. No API keys. $0/month. Here's what it can do 🧵

One common issue with personalization in all LLMs is how distracting memory seems to be for the models. A single question from 2 months ago about some topic can keep coming up as some kind of a deep interest of mine with undue mentions in perpetuity. Some kind of trying too hard.

Turns out you can run enormous Mixture-of-Experts on Mac hardware without fitting the whole model in RAM by streaming a subset of expert weights from SSD for each generated token - and people keep finding ways to run bigger models Kimi 2.5 is 1T, but only 32B active so fits 96GB