kidversations

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kidversations

kidversations

@kidversations_

Conversations with Kids https://t.co/eOgLeX9U7M

Katılım Ocak 2020
435 Takip Edilen5.3K Takipçiler
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kidversations
kidversations@kidversations_·
Another mom asked me what time I wake my kids up in the morning and I’ve never been more confused.
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kidversations
kidversations@kidversations_·
@Kronykal Mark this under reasons men should not be in charge of women’s bodies.
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Kron
Kron@Kronykal·
This chick friend of mine says every time she sneezes, coughs or laughs hard she pees a little. She claims this is common but I call bullshit.
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kidversations retweetledi
MommyingHard
MommyingHard@MommyingHard·
Parenthood is paying $100+ for a babysitter just to spend "date night" sitting in the car because now you're too broke to actually go anywhere.
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Verifried Drunk™®©
Verifried Drunk™®©@VerifiedDrunk·
that's me in the corner, that's me with the Bud, Light, getting drunk at Chili's
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kidversations
kidversations@kidversations_·
Me: I’ll let you know when dinner is ready 5: We’ll hear the alarm Me: I didn’t set an alarm 5: No, the fire alarm
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Real Life Mommy
Real Life Mommy@reallifemommy3·
The apple that never gets eaten in my kid’s lunch box is one of my longest relationships
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Real Life Mommy
Real Life Mommy@reallifemommy3·
I like to give my kids instructions they can easily follow, like: please share with each other and don’t forget to fight about who gets it first
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sixfootcandy
sixfootcandy@sixfootcandy·
Marriage is amazing. You basically get a built-in bestie to blame everything on.
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Mommeh Dearest
Mommeh Dearest@mommeh_dearest·
Me: *Making myself lunch* My 3yo: Mmm that looks good. Let’s go sit down and eat it.
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sixfootcandy
sixfootcandy@sixfootcandy·
One minute you’re young and carefree, and the next you’re the office translator for 80s movie references no one else gets.
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@sherisayssit
@sherisayssit@sherisayssit·
My friend in dance class asked me if I was ever a cheerleader and I laughed so hard I choked on my water.
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Michael Vogel
Michael Vogel@MichaelVogel1·
Some days I feel like I'm a well adjusted adult, other days I get mad that a movie left Netflix, even when I own the movie's DVD.
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redyellowgreendance 💃🏻
I’ve been on earth almost 48 years, and I’ve never seen my mom’s bare fingernails without polish
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Late to the party Laura
Late to the party Laura@ericamorecambe·
Had my hair cut into a bob and coloured red yesterday. Went to bed looking like Mary Quant and got up looking like Ziggy Stardust.
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Dadman Walking
Dadman Walking@dadmann_walking·
in true dad fashion I'm going to spend part of my Saturday morning cleaning the garage and smoking a cigar.
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meghan
meghan@deloisivete·
My 8yo is trying to sell the halloween candy he can't eat to his brother for $2 a piece, so who do I call to report price gouging
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Late to the party Laura
Late to the party Laura@ericamorecambe·
I just gave my husband listening instructions. “When there’s noise coming out of my mouth, that’s me speaking.”
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Dadman Walking
Dadman Walking@dadmann_walking·
you have the face of someone who likes almond joys and has 12 cats.
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Mommeh Dearest
Mommeh Dearest@mommeh_dearest·
Good morning! Remember to drink water and that you’re a good parent. These kids are just bad.
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