Matt Laser Beams

@KatieMiller @NICKIMINAJ The model of Christianity.

The message @NICKIMINAJ has for Don Lemon:

Lord, I see the things you have done for others…

@RepBrandonGill And then Jesus said, “Shit on your neighbors and make them feel unwelcome. They’re gross and horrible, and I hate them all. Oh, sorry, I mean, ‘I love them so much that I want them to die.’”

Nobody celebrates Kwanzaa because it isn’t a real holiday.

@NancyMace Nothing says Yuletide Cheer like a shit brown dress.

Season’s Greetings.

@Notwokenow shut up, cunt

I can’t believe that a mere 24 years after 9/11, NYC is about to elect an Islamic jihadist as Mayor. What the hell happened?

@tooquiet @NotHoodlum Your mom

@NotHoodlum Umm. To which entity does the CHIEF EXECUTIVE need to apply to for building permits?

This is from today. Now they’re filing building permits.

@RealJamesWoods Nothing says “Christ-like” to me like jokes about prison rape.

Knowing there is a possibility this guy is going to take it raw dog in Federal prison is like having Christmas in July.

@JCParking Great job not telling anyone alternate side was suspended today. /s

@mattdeanmarsh alt me, please!

@rustyrockets @LauraLoomer She’s talking about herself and, frankly, you too, Russell.

.@LauraLoomer says she stays calm in confrontations because she sees them as necessary. She believes political operatives are deceiving the public, undermining national security, and betraying America. For her, exposing corruption isn’t stress, it’s purpose.

@kairyssdal, R U O K?

@PressSec Fuck you

@andrewcuomo @ZohranKMamdani Fuck you, you arrogant rich, old sex-assaulting freak.

Today, I am proud to announce that I will be proposing “Zohran’s law," a law that will keep the rich out of New York’s affordable housing. @ZohranKMamdani : you say freeze the rent. But for who? Rich people like you? Hardworking, working class New Yorkers are being pushed from their neighborhoods. Let’s build affordable housing that helps the people who need it. Under Zohran’s law, landlords can no longer rent vacant rent-controlled units to the wealthy. You are a rich person stealing affordable housing from the poor. And you’re not the only one. It’s past time we address this injustice. Let’s build a new NYC that works for the people who need it.

@cmclymer It’s abundantly clear.

"Are you seriously claiming that Trump is deploying the National Guard to D.C. as a distraction from his relationship with Epstein?" Yes. I am. Next question.

@rustyrockets @RepMTG If by stellar you mean unhinged and full of lies.

This conversation is going to be stellar. JOIN US: bit.ly/4kMaGih

@MerriamWebster bye bye!

@jack But I want to join too!

oops. TestFlight full (10,000 people). app is still in review for full release.

@JDVance Of what?

Quite a view!

@MerriamWebster “scaffolding” in education. ugh. enough already

What is the most overused word in your industry? Let it out.