Nathalie with an h

Making milkshakes because I need help with my yard work.

Don't hate someone because of what they look like on the outside, hate them for the piece of shit they are on the inside

You know you're getting old when the radio stations and bars play music you don't like, but the supermarket is throwing out banger after banger.

No matter how old you are, an empty Christmas paper wrapping tube is still fun to bonk someone on the head with 😂

Beautiful fox in the neighborhood

Is that a mirror in your pocket are am I just happy to see me

Did any of you ever bookmark a great tweet only to later realize it was yours? Me neither.

I saw a shirt that said happiness is not expensive. That is a lie.

That’s a beautiful shade of tired you’ve got there.

@ericamorecambe @KatieDeal99

The absolute horror when someone switches the call to a video call without any forewarning.

*puts giant candy vending machine out on porch.

A butter tart could fix me.

i laugh at my own jokes because i am my target audience. y'all just happen to be there

My kind of people are the people who give a shit about other people.

@curse_t_70 This brings lunch to go to a whole new level

Rushing out the door has resulted in a strange but true

Surely *this* slice of pizza will be enough.

The fact that someone looked straight at a purple onion and named it red onion really bothers me.

Little Goldcrest amongst the pines …..

I've still got it. But I can't remember where I put it.