Tork Johnson

@SethParty @CoachDarty you’re a dirty dawg for this.

Just found out my roommate fucked a chick with a boyfriend of 3 years last night. She said not to tell anyone so her future husband doesn’t find out. #sicktostomach #neverhavingadaughter

@SethParty Guy is definitely getting cheated on

CHAAAA

Tiger Woods has arrived at the Masters

Since when did B-Dubs start giving out free condoms? #expand #bogo

Went 0/3 at the plate today so decided to update my linked in and shoot off a bunch of connections to randoms. Wish me luck #torkthoughts #iran

Tiger woods just got off the phone with the president btw

Is Kevin Mcgonigle the only guy on this fucking team with a pulse? FUCK #tigers

Happy Easter burnerverse -Torkn

@chippyslows Stfu

Shrink this fucking Michigan team man. Fuck.

@chippyslows @SethParty @longtip64920

@thetorkinator @SethParty @longtip64920 He sure did mention drafting me for the race, but in his words “the case isn’t all that I love about you, it’s your presence. I love u on this squad. I love u 8 ball”

Talk about aura man. Just thinking back to the day that the good ol SEV called me his favorite player on the squad. Nothing will top that ever. @SethParty @thetorkinator @longtip64920

@FrankieAceRizzo @CoachDarty @SethParty Franklin- you’re always welcome in our humble abode. -Torkinator

Appreciate the tour of the crib, fellas. @CoachDarty @thetorkinator @SethParty

I fucking hate excel and every professor that uses it. Especially if you attach 15 minute step by step tutorials with what you want done. #shrinkexcel

@Listen__Son This list fucking sucks I love eating box

12 Mistakes you should NEVER make when it comes to women (and the dating market). 1. Never eat a woman's p*ssy

@CoachDarty and I are conversing with the womens lax team rn… thinking about getting a dog for next year and sharing custody of it together to see how responsible we are. Gonna make the women pay for everything. #LANK what dog we should get

@CoenBarr You’re a lazy piece of shit

Lifting might be the most unenjoyable hobby on earth, I want to fucking be rotting rn

@🐻 and @👔 i will find your burners. yours truly, Seth.

@chippyslows It would be a great day if that happened

What if this truck just fucking fell on me

@CoachDarty Appears that way. Kenley Jansen looked like a fuckin bank teller cashing all of vests runs in as well.

Did Will Vest show up to the ballpark hammered today?!

@CoachDarty Coach- I wouldn’t read too much into the compromise. We’ve got a solid group of men in our corner. Hope this helps. -Tork

6 followers and the burner still has become compromised #kms