pootin

The jerk store called. Your son is sick.

@actualbenstorm @jeremyslevin He already enforced Mamdani on twitter?

@jeremyslevin And of course Adam is still undecided #cuomoconnection

it’s happening

@MLWellshhi @ZohranKMamdani Tell that to Sweden, Norway, Denmark, Finland

In the words of Nelson Mandela: it always seems impossible until it’s done. My friends, it is done. And you are the ones who did it. I am honored to be your Democratic nominee for the Mayor of New York City.

@moonmaidenz @darkminer @elonmusk @realDonaldTrump You’ll have plenty more opportunities to do that lol

@stylesgala She’s literally 2 inches away from being a midget and there’s 1000 lookalikes in Nashville

godspeed to any man who fumbles this

i knew it was serious when i saw straight men on tiktok getting mad at barry for fumbling sabrina

@lillybilly299 I once jaywalked in Japan and a man next to me looking at his phone followed assuming there must be a walk signal. He looked up half way, saw it was red, looked behind him, saw it was also red, and panicked in confusion until I waved him toward me

When my mother first moved to Japan, she tried to jaywalk while pushing a stroller on an empty residential street. She was immediately stopped by an old, well dressed Japanese man who solemnly told her in perfect English "the downfall of society begins with the individual"

@WootsieFootsie @tammy8ok Fr look at that skirt too

@tammy8ok fashion really is a skill

& that's what you decided to do w it

@JamesRath @ScottTheWoz No white hair, you ain’t fooling anybody

@ScottTheWoz Sorry I meant to factory reset it

I bought an old iPhone on eBay and its last owner knew Jason Mamoa.

@Myworldmyway10 @Get0ffMyLawn_ @BaharAzamm561 @Marcel_LJ Fr imagine claiming dick riding when you’re boot licking lol

@Get0ffMyLawn_ @BaharAzamm561 @Marcel_LJ Blud resorted to homosexual rhetoric when he had no response 😂

Body cam footage of Tyreek Hill and Calais Campbell’s detainment Sunday has been released

@patusanian @littlesaintnick @BDNM93 @Marcel_LJ @AdamSchefter

@rippinsometunes @ModernDayInves @barstoolsports What’s it like waking up every day as a loser?

Tyreek Hill Body-Cam Video Has Been Released buff.ly/47mDoB3

@social_rate @SaErnst So how do you know lol

@SaErnst i’m not 25

truly one of the saddest parts of the human condition is our inability to update our beliefs in light of new information past the age of 25

ㅤ

@realsydroc @interesting_aIl The greatest honor a video can receive in 2024

@interesting_aIl I watched all of that at 1x

Imagine how much practice this would have taken

"no rapping tonight" why? "you rap about patrick swayze everytime, it's embarrassing" ok [after one beer] uh oh y'all it's gettin kinda hazy

RT @hourly_shitpost: ㅤ

@PhillyMovieNerd Le Trou. Great French film hardly anyone has seen

@A2Fenix @ChorazyU @CultureCrave @nytimes Name one Pitt flop

@ChorazyU @CultureCrave @nytimes And the fact that most of their movies flop like a MF. Apple just got money to burn tho I guess.

Brad Pitt and George Clooney were each paid $35M to star in #Wolfs Director Jon Watts was paid $15M The movie will be in theaters for one week before releasing on Apple TV+ September 27 (via @nytimes)

@MKUltraMoney Gays have more parasites cuz they eat ass

Is this the final red pill on homosexuality?

@StefanPatatu @shinboson Gays have more parasites cuz they eat ass

@shinboson this is evidence towards gayness being a disease x.com/MKUltraMoney/s…

@KDimitratos @vocalcry Fr how did I get cavities non stop as a kid after being told I was brushing great and I haven’t had any since?

@vocalcry Why did this make me think of dentists.

>car randomly having a hard time accelerating >bring car to dealership >they find all kinds of “problems” >quote me $8K to “fix” >no thanks >bring car to mechanic >spends a few hours fiddling with it >“car is in eco mode”