Mark D

@TheBabylonBee Christ, you know it ain’t easy You know how hard it can be The way things are going They’re gonna crucify me

Trump Complains He’s Being Crucified For Comparing Himself To Jesus buff.ly/VxddB1N

@washingtonpost It’s not a mystery to anyone with a brain.

Rep. Eric Swalwell’s (D) fall left many asking how someone who was dogged by persistent rumors of inappropriate behavior toward women could have risen so high and so fast in a party that says it supports women’s rights. wapo.st/4tTgVG2

@KenGardner11 @andyinsdca @berthatter Yes, that’s why they call the USA the “Great Satan” and Israel the “Little Satan.”

@andyinsdca @berthatter I was talking about Iran hating us and the Gulf states more than Israel. I agree 100% with Zineb, who is brilliant.

I’m going to make many of you spitting mad at me for pointing this out, but now that we have started the naval blockade, Iran’s strategic position (which was already hopeless) has become terminal. They are soon going to run out of storage space for their oil. And we haven’t even yet taken Kharg Island. This will force them to shut down current oil production, which itself is a drastic step that will further wreck their economy. Without their oil money, they’re finished. And no one is coming to save them, either. Nobody wants to mess with the two best militaries on the planet. Meanwhile, pretty much the entire rest of the globe is demanding that Iran reopen the strait. And because markets always adjust, the Gulf states are already adopting workarounds in order to avoid this same problem in the future. When the history of this war is written, it will be recorded that the regime’s decision to close the strait was a colossal miscalculation that relied too heavily on short term consequences (a hike in the price of oil, coupled with the belief that nations would unite against us rather than them). In chess, there is a famous quote to the effect that the threat is always stronger than the execution. Here, the threat to close the strait was stronger, especially with Trump and with countries in Europe and the Far East. The decision to close the strait was never going to work as long as we refused to budge. And it has greatly weakened Iran’s position. The same point applies to Iranian attacks on energy structure and desalination plants. Once they went beyond mere threats to actual attacks, they weakened their position and strengthened our resolve and those of our allies. Now everyone fully understands the risk of the regime’s ability to blackmail the global economy on top of all their other shit. The Gulf states now understand the folly of hoping that the alligator would eat them last, and are now working on a closer alliance with U.S. and Israel. I don’t know how much longer this war will last. But don’t bitch at me when I say that we have had a clear strategic plan from the beginning and that it is playing out. Once we decided that Iran was not going to surrender immediately, we decided to begin the death grip with the blockade. The rest is now a matter of time, patience, and persistence.

@klara_sjo What about the two Bush women?

You think Melania was the first ever First Lady to not have a bush?

@optimistic5518 He was better tonight. At this rate, he’ll be pitching complete game shutouts by November!

how much longer can they keep doing this??? my gosh

@FivePointsVids Joe Theismann Doug Williams Mark Rypein DC/MD/VA

Im making a list of non-hall of fame athletes who will never have to buy a drink again for the rest of their lives (and city). So far I have: Mike Richter - NYC Robert Horry - Multiple Alex Gordon - KC Nick Foles - Philly The more obscure the better. Post yours👇

@3YearLetterman Everybody knows Muslims love Jesus more than Christians even 🙄

I can’t top this

@JoeyMulinaro This is so clever

1st lawn cut of the year presser

@EHetz3 @DrunkRepub I love the decrease in government jobs too

@DrunkRepub To say nothing of the ABSOLUTE White Pill that is this masterpiece. Trump may not be perfect, but he's been better than any Republican of my life. And I was born when Reagan was president.

“You’re blackpilling? Swalwell is out of Congress and possibly going to jail, Omar has been caught taking taxpayer cash for a fake rehab clinic, the markets are roaring and America controls global oil traffic. And you’re blackpilling?”

@LamarMK Using the right lane to pass slowpokes who hog the left lane. They don’t even have time to speed up before I’m around them.

Tesla owners, what is your favorite part about the ownership experience? I want potential buyers to hear from real customers and what they can expect if they decide to buy a Tesla. One of my favorites is the convenience of charging at home. Never having to go to a gas station where the price is always fluctuating. Drop yours below. Let's help someone make the switch.

@truthandtesla I got a Model Y one year ago and bought my wife a used Model X a few months back. I love FSD (with HW4) and trust it completely. HW3 scares me 😂

I am 62 and I have owned the following vehicles in my life: 1963 Volvo 122S 1962 karma ghia by Volkswagen 1975 toyota corolla 1963 Chevy station wagon 1986 Honda accord LXi 1992 Honda Accord LXi 1995 Eddie Bauer Ford Explorer 2000 Eddie Bauer Ford explorer 1999 econoline Ford V8 stretch van 2008 Chevy suburban 2008 Audi A6 station wagon 2011 convertible mini cooper 2016 Ford f150 2018 240i convertible m series bmw 2006 Honda Accord 2008 Ford F350 Latiet diesel 2023 Tesla model 3 performance 2024 Tesla cyber truck foundation series 2026 Tesla Rwd model Y Ask me anything. I am an entrepreneurial female who has owned many businesses and have raised three lovely young men. I have owned, as you can see, my share of cars throughout the years. I am dumbfounded how anyone can buy anything but a Tesla after all I have lived and what I know. Feelings about Elon aside, which I do not fathom either, Teslas by 100x are the most amazing vehicles especially for the price of anything I have ever owned. Everytime I get in the cybertruck, I re live my awe all over again, from the tight turns it takes, how low I can lower it while loading, how it powers my cabin when power goes out, I could go on and on and on - about all the features I love about it besides the basic Tesla features. It is the most amazing vehicle ever produced. I am shocked that anyone can ever buy an ice vehicle if they really researched and knew what they were choosing. Safety, lack of driving fatigue you don’t even realize you have until you don’t have it anymore, quiet, peaceful ride experience, charging clean in my garage for $1 a night, lack of maintenance concern ever, service (I have found to be so pleasant), buying experience (literally takes 5 mins), ease of having others drive with key share, there are just so many things…… it’s remarkable to me when my Tesla is driving down the road by itself, and I look around at that 99.9% of those around me all driving themselves-how dangerous they are compared to me. No shade on them but the fact is, they are a huge liability on the road and I am not. Every accident I have seen in the past three years is an accident that would not have happened in a Tesla world. And I have seen a lot - even fatal ones. It’s so sad to me how the entire global public is being gaslit about teslas - it’s clearly a designed slowdown of adoption - because adoption that would happen if the truth was revealed, would be catastrophic to the old paradigm, the old supply chain, the unions, the car dealerships, the gas stations as they sit a top tanks they would have to be pulled out of the ground (expensive), the insurance and medical industry that makes so much money off the accidents. The list goes on and on about the disruption it would cause if the truth really got out. So the powers that be, lie, to slow down the adoption they know is inevitable, to give themselves time to pivot out of the already obsolete. I am a 62 year old female who has seen and lived a lot in my life - this current state of affairs regarding the wool being pulled over the eyes of the masses, regarding the utter superiority of Tesla- is the most profound phenomenon I have ever lived. It’s truly uncanny.

@ClayTravis You know Walz is taking it out on his poor son.

One year ago Democrats were firebombing Tesla dealerships. Now Elon Musk is poised to have the largest IPO in world history. Tim Walz is so upset by this he can’t even do spirit fingers and high leg kicks.

@harper_dyl66271 @keithedwards

Lmao celebrating Lindsey Graham for 31 years in office with “zero sexual assault allegations from women” like that’s some noble achievement. Bro has spent three decades warmongering, flip flopping for power, and licking boots yet the bar is now so low we clap for basic decency instead of actual policies or public service. This is what peak American politics looks like in 2026. Pathetic. Stay confused 😵‍💫 they like it that way

31 years in office. 0 sexual assault allegations from women.

@mehdirhasan Right…

A reminder that this is how politics - and shame - is supposed to work. A politician is accused of major scandals, crimes!, and their party disowns them and they are forced out not just from a race from but from public life. You’re not supposed to re-elect them to the presidency.

@NancyMace I told my Mom “thank you.” Stay strong!

I’m at a loss for a lifetime of words. Sitting beside my dad, grateful for every hard, beautiful, complicated moment we’ve ever had together. I’ve been praying over him, praying for him to see peace and for his mercy. On Friday I witnessed him accept Christ as his savior. That’s a miracle inside of our grief. I’m at a loss for all the words I want to say. The things I haven’t told him yet. He’s fought hard. He’s loved deeply. And he’ll be at peace one day soon. 🙏 For those who’ve walked this road - what are the words you said or the words you wished you’d had? What scripture did you pray over your loved ones? Tell me your stories. I need them today. ❤️

@BuzzPatterson Nepal? No, pal 😂

I’ve never taken off here, I want to. Nepal.

To be brutally honest, you’d have to be an absolute fucking idiot, with the critical thinking skills of a lobotomised goldfish to need any reminder of the glaringly obvious truth: that pumping your body full of powerful drugs which destroy your sexual function, libido, and long-term physical health, while hacking off perfectly healthy body parts in some deranged quest to “transition,” is an absolute catastrophe for your mental health. And let’s not sugarcoat this insanity: even after all that self-mutilation and chemical castration, you still don’t come anywhere close to resembling the opposite sex. You just end up looking like a grotesque, surgically butchered parody of a human being trapped in a broken, infertile shell with irreversible damage, skyrocketing regret, and a shredded psyche that was already fragile to begin with. Wake the fuck up.

@PaulaWoodDMV Congrats Mom! The double steal of home was my favorite thing he did this last week, and he made a lot of amazing plays!

What a week. #GoNats

@NancyMace @jarvis_best Prayers and blessings for your Dad and your family.

I sat beside him. Held his hand. Told him everything I needed to say. I gave dad all of my words tonight. We have no unfinished business. A rare and precious gift from God. Our family also witnessed one of life's most sacred moments, a father finding faith at the end. I'll hold onto this forever. Our Father who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come, thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven.

@DrunkRepub I’m with Scott Adams: alcohol is poison. I like a nice drink but I’ve cut it to 1-2 a month for health reasons 🤷🏻‍♂️

Then explain Keith Richards genius