Alex Kayàl

@ToonTakeover_ @lee_ryder I have the same expression when I order a KFC family bucket

🚨 🇧🇷 JOELINTON UPDATE! Talk of Joelinton leaving Newcastle United has been played down behind the scenes at the Club. Joelinton has travelled to La Manga and insiders have dismissed talk of a transfer to the Saudi Pro League. #NUFC Via @lee_ryder

@ToonTakeover_ Also: sell his fresh vision sounds like when a 58 year old CEO hires a 22 year old secretary

🚨 🇧🇷 BRUNO UPDATE! Newcastle United's new Head Coach, Matthias Jaissle, wants a sit-down, face-to-face talk with Bruno Guimaraes. The 38-year-old will sell his fresh vision and philosophy to the Club Captain in a last-ditch attempt to change his mind about leaving. #NUFC

@ToonTakeover_ Aint gonna happen broski

Predictions: MJ & GK announced by Monday Bruno goes Pope goes J7, Willock & Murphy go? Hall stays 🙏🏻 Sign 1/2 CMs: Susic, Frohdolt or Ouédraogo No.10? Wide attacker CB, Wing Back When you write it down that seems mental! But GK + 4/5 feels right #nufc

@ToonTakeover_ Had him as top scorer in the WC fant. Sounds redic ofc but it wasn't my fault that Nagelsmann didn't play him

The fact that we now have a young, forward-thinking, German manager can only be a good thing for Woltemade. We need to find a way to get the best out of him....in a style the whole team is comfortable with. We already know he can get the goals if he gets the service. #NUFC

@Nufc_fnd Another question: can you elaborate on what happens exactly if you go up to (but not breach) 115%, and why can’t we do it every season and pay the fine?

"What actually is SCR?" Asked constantly, explained badly everywhere. So here's the whole thing in one thread, in plain English, no jargon. Because these rules explain half of Newcastle's summer. 🧵🖤🤍 #NUFC

@Nufc_fnd Question: why are our earnings so small compared with the so called big 6, even though we have a similar or larger size stadium and played twice in the UCL lately?

@GianfrancoShoIa Snacks is how EasyJet gets you. And I'm not gonna mention the other airline that starts with R

“No in flight snacks over €4”

@GeordiePaul81 I always get Messi 10 printed on the jerseys I buy, regardless of the team. Saves me the heartache

You can guess which name I had printed on the back of the new shirt…

@ToonTakeover_ Must have been the same shock when Bobby Kennedy told Indianapolis that MLK was assassinated

🚨 BREAKING NEWS! The entire Newcastle United playing squad has now been officially informed of Eddie Howe's departure from the Club. Meeting held early this morning at the KNOX. #NUFC

@MatthiasJaissl I’m sorry but it’s just Alex

@MatthiasJaissl Good luck Matthias and welcome to the mad house ;)

@KennyLijia78236 @ToonTakeover_ Respect the ball please

@ToonTakeover_ Not another Yes man like Rosenior please

Who the hell is Matthias Jaissle? 😯😯😯 #NUFC

@FrancisChipp Looks like Mr. Peanut and Julian Nagelsmann had a baby

Matthias Jaissle is going to be incredible, bookmark this ✅

@GianfrancoShoIa Has he left us tho? Immediate lined up replacement may suggest otherwise

He’s 100% been told they’re selling Bruno and fucked off

@El_Cunto76 Your guess is as good as mine

Managed to stay off here since the end of the season, but WTF man, this should have happened long before now, what’s going on???

@FabrizioRomano WOW. WOW. WTF

🚨💣 EXCLUSIVE: Eddie Howe set to part ways with Newcastle with immediate effect. Big developments expected at #NUFC with decision to change + talks already starting for his replacement. ⚪️⚫️

@AIfieNUFC 5

How many points should we expect from our first 5 games #NUFC

@GrangeMount @PintsBeauty Someone finally said it

@PintsBeauty Any Brewdog “product”. Rat piss.

Most overrated beer? 🍺🤔

@ToonFan14 Kind regards,

Dear Galatasaray, We at Newcastle United would really like to sign Wilfried Singo. He seems lovely. Don’t tell anyone though because then he won’t come. PS) He’s a bit old for our current approach. Can you change this? Happy to discuss. Yours Sincerely, #NUFC