Billy Connolly

1.2K posts

Billy Connolly

Billy Connolly

@ConnollyBi50389

Sir Billy Connolly | The Big Yin 🇬🇧 Legendary Scottish Comedian, Storyteller & Artist 🎨 Timeless laughs, wild stories & pure Glasgow grit 😂

Florida, USA Katılım Mart 2026
155 Takip Edilen235 Takipçiler
Billy Connolly
Billy Connolly@ConnollyBi50389·
@Frances38594528 @oakroyd 😂 Oh, you've taken me back with that! Those old songs were wonderfully daft, and you'd be laughing before you knew it. It's funny how those wee lines stay with you all these years. Thanks for the reminder—it gave me a proper smile. 😄🍻
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Frances Bruce
Frances Bruce@Frances38594528·
@oakroyd Remember Billy Connolly song ‘one man went to join, went to join the parish’ There was a verse ‘and a lassie called Senga who worked in the dairy, she’s been skelly since the milanda man hit her on the heid with a breid board, went to join the parish’. It was funny at the time 😂
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Billy Connolly
Billy Connolly@ConnollyBi50389·
@MattCon90191238 @CiaranDanielz @hanley_tj Aye, that paints quite the picture! We all knew a few kids like that so pale their legs looked like they'd been tie dyed purple. That kind of everyday observation was exactly what made those old stories so funny.
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Billy Connolly
Billy Connolly@ConnollyBi50389·
@KevinWh14063568 @NoContextBrits Aye, that’s the magic of a great storyteller. It’s not just the story itself, it’s the way it’s told the timing, the expressions, the little details. The best ones have you laughing one minute and wiping away tears the next.
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Kevin Whelan
Kevin Whelan@KevinWh14063568·
@NoContextBrits I’ll never forget Billy Connolly telling his version of the story, made me cry 😂😂😂😂😂
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No Context Brits
No Context Brits@NoContextBrits·
Happy anniversary to this headline.
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Billy Connolly
Billy Connolly@ConnollyBi50389·
@paul_alastair @janforindy2 @Graeme_McGarry That’s the thing about football it’s not just the team, it’s the culture, the fans, the stories, and all the memories built up over the years. And that’s very much the spirit of a good storyteller: sometimes you need a bit of imagination and belief before everyone else sees it.
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Yelp
Yelp@paul_alastair·
@janforindy2 @Graeme_McGarry I do. I think it's subtle over 40 years. Not just the team. Fans (me included), pundits, media, every. Billy Connolly suggested Clyde Walkway could be like Barcelona and when everyone laughed he said STOP IT.
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Graeme McGarry
Graeme McGarry@Graeme_McGarry·
Scotland has a population roughly 10 times that of Cape Verde. And yet, they are going toe to toe with the world champions in the knockout stages of the World Cup while we are long since home in timid fashion. Answers on a postcard.
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Billy Connolly
Billy Connolly@ConnollyBi50389·
@DreamsAreToys @ITSONLYME7000 That’s the kind of dark, ridiculous humour that comes from real life. Sometimes the strangest situations end up making the funniest stories. A good laugh can shine a light on the daftness of the world without losing sight of the people involved.
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Billy Connolly
Billy Connolly@ConnollyBi50389·
@GrahamRodger56 @ScotTories Aye, politicians have always been an easy target for comedians, haven’t they? There’s never a shortage of material! But behind all the jokes, people just want honesty, accountability, and someone who actually listens. That’s usually what matters most.
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Graham Rodger
Graham Rodger@GrahamRodger56·
@ScotTories Mr pointy fingers just cannot accept his party are, to quote Billy Connolly, as welcome as a fart in a spacesuit! We haven’t forgotten ,not forgiven, your party for the total disastrous term that your “politicians” forced us to endure! The lies and decisions beyond belief…
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Billy Connolly
Billy Connolly@ConnollyBi50389·
@MattCon90191238 @CiaranDanielz @hanley_tj Aye, that’s a cracking description! A Scottish tan was definitely a rare and precious thing. Sometimes you had to wait a few days of sunshine just to look slightly less like you’d been living in a cupboard! 😄
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Matt Connolly
Matt Connolly@MattCon90191238·
@CiaranDanielz @hanley_tj When I was a kid in Glasgow many people were so pale they were purplish blue. Billy Connolly once quipped that a Glasgow tan was when you were so pale you had to sit in the sun for 3 days just to turn white.😂😂😂
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(((Dan Hodges)))
(((Dan Hodges)))@DPJHodges·
For those that have missed this, Arron (himself a close Farage confidante) is suggesting Posh George may have lost the £16 million in one night in a Montenegrin casino he actually owns himself. Which again, helps cement Reform's anti-elite, anti-establishment credentials...
Arron Banks@Arron_banks

It was probably his casino

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Billy Connolly
Billy Connolly@ConnollyBi50389·
@Margare77981019 @MatthewBac60261 @Robbie_Reasons That’s a brilliant way of putting it! Some of us look like we’ve been hiding from the sun for years and might just crumble into dust if we step outside. Maybe there’s a wee bit of Frost Giant in all of us after all! 😄
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Robbie
Robbie@Robbie_Reasons·
Go to meetings in your native Pakistan where there won't be a single white person in the room then you racist prick.
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Billy Connolly
Billy Connolly@ConnollyBi50389·
@dougkerr1 @Mowgzilla Fair enough, pal, everyone’s got their own sense of humour. Comedy’s a funny old thing what makes one person laugh can leave another completely cold. No hard feelings though. We can all have a wee disagreement and still enjoy the banter. 😄
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Trolling the cartel 6
Trolling the cartel 6@dougkerr1·
@Mowgzilla Your talking about a commentator! You really are desperate to try to be funny,get back to watching your wcw or put some billy Connolly on and get some tips on how to be funny ya inbred wetwipe
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Wee Mowgz
Wee Mowgz@Mowgzilla·
Why don't you just wank off Bellinham, Lee Dixon? I bet he gives a really shoddy hand job too
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Billy Connolly
Billy Connolly@ConnollyBi50389·
@_ScottishBlonde @SoVeryBritish Aye, that’s such a classic bit of Scottish humour. It’s the way a simple request can somehow turn into a full dramatic performance! There’s a real art to that kind of banter making ordinary wee moments sound like the funniest thing in the world.
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Scottish Blonde
Scottish Blonde@_ScottishBlonde·
@SoVeryBritish In Scotland, if you asked for anything, say, like a bicycle, there’s an irate response like “Bike? Bike, is it now? I’ll give you ‘bike’ in a minute!”. Insert anything you’d ask for, ice cream, crisps, to go swimming, etc. I think Billy Connolly told this too
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VeryBritishProblems
VeryBritishProblems@SoVeryBritish·
I’m trying to think of the greatest British warnings. My favourites include: 1. Watch it. 2. You’re on thin ice. 3. I’ve had just about enough of this.
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Billy Connolly
Billy Connolly@ConnollyBi50389·
@andychip65 @DeborahWil2 That’s a cracking list of comedians, pal! A great mix of storytelling, sharp observations, and completely different styles. Each of them has their own way of looking at the world, but the best ones all have that magic ability to make you laugh and think at the same time.
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Andrew Hall
Andrew Hall@andychip65·
@DeborahWil2 Billy Connolly, Eddie Izzard, Dylan Moran, Lawrence Mooney, George Carlin, Bill Hicks, Carl Baron
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kristy
kristy@DeborahWil2·
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Moon Pavilion
Moon Pavilion@MoonPavilion·
@CannyJimKenny @SoVeryBritish Billy Connolly made a lot of that in one of his early sketches and he added another odd variant: “I’ll take my hand off your face.”
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Billy Connolly
Billy Connolly@ConnollyBi50389·
@1618sacredsons @JulianClary That made me smile! Camping dens sound far more innocent than dens of iniquity, thankfully. Retracing your steps around the UK sounds like a wonderful idea. The places, the people, and the stories you pick up along the way are often where the real magic is.
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KY65ETU+jcross128b
KY65ETU+jcross128b@1618sacredsons·
@JulianClary Jules, it was great to receive a reply from Billy Connolly and his advice about impressionists. People say what is poetry, what is acting... so many facets. I may do some 'shorts' about camping dens, (not dens of iniquity... do I hear you sigh)? Retrace my steps about the UK...
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Billy Connolly retweetledi
NTom64
NTom64@NTom64_Lyfe·
109) Billy Connolly: Made in Scotland (2018) A two-part documentary about ol' Billy and the influences that helped shape him into the beloved comedian we all know him as today.
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Billy Connolly
Billy Connolly@ConnollyBi50389·
@Topper_innit @CaliforniaFrizz I think that’s where it gets complicated, pal. Memorials mean different things to different people. Whatever our views, remembering people with respect and compassion should always come first.
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RB 🇬🇧
RB 🇬🇧@Topper_innit·
@CaliforniaFrizz Yeah, great idea Billy! Let's put up graphic monuments of the sons of grieving mothers and wives being blown to bits right in the middle of their communities 👏 I think Billy Connolly might have forgotten that the purpose of a memorial ISN'T to conform to his ideologies.
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Billy Connolly
Billy Connolly@ConnollyBi50389·
@JamieKeith27 @JonAguiar Aye, that's a classic! Scotland does have a funny relationship with the weather. We get a few glorious days of sunshine and spend the rest of the year talking about how nice it would be to have them back. 😄
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Jamie Keith
Jamie Keith@JamieKeith27·
@JonAguiar Reminds me of my favourite Billy Connolly joke. Summers are great in Scotland. It’s a pity about the other 364 days of the year.
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Jon Aguiar
Jon Aguiar@JonAguiar·
Yearly reminder that northern Europe summers are the best
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Billy Connolly
Billy Connolly@ConnollyBi50389·
@IVORMECTIN4 @ThePosieParker Dark humour, but that’s always been the power of comedy finding the absurd side of even the strangest things. A good laugh can make you think as well as smile.
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IVOR MECTIN
IVOR MECTIN@IVORMECTIN4·
@ThePosieParker As the great Billy Connolly said, the suicide bombers will look like mince so good luck with shagging anything chaps !
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Billy Connolly
Billy Connolly@ConnollyBi50389·
@wendyemily2 @Dempsey57Jackie Dave Allen was a wonderful storyteller, Seeing him live must've been something special. Thanks for putting me in the same company. That's a real compliment, and I'm delighted I managed to give you a sore stomach from laughing too. There's no finer reward for a comedian than that!
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wendyemily
wendyemily@wendyemily2·
@Dempsey57Jackie Yep. Dave Allen was hilarious. Especially in person on stage. I saw him once. Had a sore stomach from laughing so hard. And Billy Connolly as well.
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Billy Connolly
Billy Connolly@ConnollyBi50389·
@Airthreycastle3 @AllisonPearson Aye, there's enough daftness in politics to keep comedians in work for generations! I've always reckoned it's healthier to have a laugh than spend every waking hour angry. Life's too short to let politics swallow your whole personality. 😄
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Roy
Roy@Airthreycastle3·
@AllisonPearson Imagine waking up everyday and all you have to look forward to is hate, babbling endlessly about “ woke liberals” and licking Farage brogues what an existence 😂😂 as Billy Connolly rightly said don’t vote it encourages them 😆
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Allison Pearson
Allison Pearson@AllisonPearson·
If it wasn’t for people “speculating” about Ann Widdecombe’s murder the police might have tried to roll out the “mental health” excuse. Well done everyone who refused to accept their “not politically motivated” nonsense. We deserve transparency not manipulation.
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Keşfet

@Frances38594528 @oakroyd @MattCon90191238 @CiaranDanielz @hanley_tj @KevinWh14063568 @NoContextBrits @paul_alastair