The Director

This scene is playing out perfectly.

He’s ten years old at a restaurant with his parents. Have his dad make enough comments about the waitress so that theyre fighting the entire way home.

He’s just given up alcohol. Make sure his favorite sports teams win The World Series, The Super Bowl and the NBA Finals all in the same year.

He just started the dishwasher. Put a couple more forks in the sink.

As soon as they’re shaking hands and exchanging names, immediately wipe his memory clean.

He’s feeling under the weather and checking his symptoms online, make every symptom correlate with every fatal disease

“Make him wake up at 2:47 am for no reason and be unable to fall back asleep”

“He’s about to have a mental breakdown about finances. Have his wife send him a Zillow listing.”

“He just got his car washed. Have a bird shit on it.”

In the Captcha asking to select every part of the bike, have it look like one square has a tiny fragment of the bike in it so he has to guess. Now make his guess wrong and lock him out

Fill his steam library with games so he won’t know what to play

Ask her if she thought about calming down.

The Steelers don’t know if their Quarterback is coming back, and it’s the middle of May. Put them on Primetime for three straight weeks.

“Make her redeem the Google gift card.”

"He has something important to tell you. Start talking about Janice at work, keep talking. Now pause for 4 seconds, when he starts to talk tell him you're not done"

He’s showing his mom a picture on his phone. Make her start swiping.

'You just took a bath. Good. Now, shit so much that you get poop up to your neck. Perfect"

@TMZ Release the trailer for Michael part 2

He's finally rebuilt his dynasty team into a legit title contender. Have the commissioner fold the league because they're in too many and are trying to spend more time with their family

"He’s about to apply for jobs, make sure to introduce a 1000 Indians who never applied for jobs in their lives so it ruins his chances"

He's in the field for multiple days eating only MRE's? Good, now give him Beef Taco Filling every single time.