Elezonfon

@Oluchi_Utd Mbuemo has been a weapon fashioned against Bruno for 3 weeks now

Against Brighton, if Bruno passes to you and you miss, you’d be sold to Chelsea as punishment.

@teeblaze @DavidHundeyin So you didn’t see 99.99%

I'll also say this as someone who grew up on the nice side of the barbed wire fences and high gates in the very nice part of town where the Nigerian 0.1% live - learn to touch grass and worry about yourself because rich people really do not care about you. Like, at all. The Nigerian rich don't even like each other. They barely tolerate one another and make practical alliances to preserve wealth and influence. And now that the economy is too small to support all the children of the Nigerian 0.1%, nearly everyone I grew up with in the nice, leafy part of town now lives in Toronto or London or wherever. You, Mr N250k/month Union Bank contract staff are not part of rich people's thinking at all. At. All. The rich have no plans for you. They have no plans to create opportunities for you. They have no plans to fix the things they broke on their way to building that N1bn townhouse in Parkview Estate. They have no plans to contribute towards making society better. If Satan came from Hell with a tail and horns growing out of his head and he ran for political office, the rich would all go make deals with him - because in the world of the rich, the only thing that matters is their own interests, and making sure that they never, EVER have to live like you or next to you. So all this simping and vicarious fawning over wealth and fame that you people do everyday is the most redundant thing in the world - the rich have no intention of expanding their circle to let you in, and they have no intention of enabling the conditions for you to create your own independent circle of wealth. The only thing the rich need from you is to be poor and obedient, so that your labour can be cheap, plentiful and replaceable. Statistically as a Nigerian, you will NEVER be rich or close to it. You will NEVER live in Maitama. 99.99% of Nigerians who have existed since 1960 have prayed and fantasised about becoming rich, and 99.99% of those prayers and fantasies never came true. That's just math. You will never be a rich and famous celebrity. You will never be a successful content creator. You will never make millions shilling crypto, trading Forex, sports betting, or whatever the fuck is the latest quick wealth fantasy in town. It's just not going to happen. That being the case, a much more constructive use of your time would be to fight for the material elevation of what you actually have, where you actually have it. Instead of daydreaming about the N300m house in Lekki that 3 generations of your family cannot buy, get involved in a local effort to give your own immediate neighbourhood a facelift, or a political campaign to pressure the state to build high quality social housing. If you hate being harassed without consequence online, instead of vicariously enjoying how a celebrity has used their wealth and influence to jail someone for making a horrid tweet, fight for a judiciary and legal system that is transparent and accessible to all, so that a singer living in the UK on a global talent visa doesn't get to have more access to your Nigerian justice system than you who lives in Nigeria 24/7. Instead of building your mental architecture around the false idea of being a "temporarily embarrassed millionaire" who will someday take your rightful place on Banana Island, touch grass tonight and accept that it will never happen, and what you need to do instead is fight for where you are to become a better, more liveable place that you no longer wish to escape from. Stop cosplaying as rich folk. Stop cooing and fawning over rich folk. Stop daydreaming about someday "blowing up" and buying a house next to Burna Boy. Rich people have no intention of sharing their world with you. Free yourself from the tyranny of living vicariously through people who don't care that you exist. Them no really send any part of your papa at all.

@clashreport Trojan horse

Before boarding Air Force One to leave Beijing, the entire U.S. delegation dumped every item given to them by Chinese hosts — gifts, badges, pins, commemorative items — into a trash bin on site. Nothing of Chinese origin got on the plane. The delegation had already left personal devices at home and used clean burner phones throughout the trip.

@jon_d_doe @Egbejimbaf51680 What about Ugo’s case

Can you all now see why I keep hammering that provision is a man's shield? Now she's using his inability to provide (if true) as a justification for her cheating. While stylishly avoiding accountability and blamed everything on him. Keep looking for 50/50 women. End.

@ABUJAPLUG @Theophilusonoc2 I dey here o , make una help me carry me alone abeg

@Theophilusonoc2 You too? 🤣

@holardb @FirstDoctor And also how do i check my liver kidney and diabetes,

@FirstDoctor Is not about drinking alcohol is about drink poisonous water, we don't have access to good water in Nigeria, we need to drink purified water to have a good health, what we drink kills than what we eat. Am running an analysis on Nigeria water and all of them is bad.

Liver cancer is no longer an old man’s disease. I’m seeing it in 30+ adults who barely drink. Hepatitis and MASLD. Most people have no idea. The liver has no pain receptors. By the time it hurts, it’s stage 4.

@holardb @FirstDoctor So how can I find a good water

@FlawlessEm82911 @gtagmemes Maa Niguh

@gtagmemes I wanted to B a banker but life dey cheque me daily without balancing. I gat withdraw

@ABUJAPLUG Make una help me , na die I dey so

What is your Plan B if your Plan A doesn’t work?

@leodey4uu I have knacked a lady who came to my house just 1 and forever into hating so much , that i destroyed her pussy

First man to knack a woman to loving him 😂

Nobody : Random Babe asking for urgent 2k Me : I don’t have dear , My hands are tied

@Taiwo_junzi Government opueh , for the people and of the people

Nigerian men wey no fit knack without catching feelings. Them Dey always gatekeep community opueh! Generational mumu’s!😂😂

@figxres I have been tested before and I passed it

i’m dead. 💔

@Dharmilolarr01 My girl say na her ashwawo friend give her

All of a sudden your babe just get naughty stickers for WhatsApp 🌚😂

@BallWizardry Ahhh , even as I dey pity my babe cramps I still Deh dey happy say she don see her period 😫💔

as you dey pet your babe because she get cramps, another guy dey happy say she don see her period 😆😭

U are the next to testify 😂🔥

@fanta_de_joker Oh my goodness

@Kene_Nnewi @EBona69 Someone like me fit no survive this one oo Mpa … Chineke Biko kwa o

@EBona69 I'm telling you brother....that's if you can survive this kind of eternal pains.

Calm down bro...

@fanta_de_joker Make una warn my mama o

Marriage dey make person young 😂🔥

You lick am Abi you no lick am?