JD French retweetledi
Hello, Boston Red Sox fans, it is I, Doc...a really annoying guy who coined THE DURBINATOR™️! (ask Grok).
I present to you, the Ultimate Caleb Durbin Primer:
It all started on a moonlit night in 2023 when, through the fumes of potent bourbon, I stumbled upon a scrappy young 5'7 185lb Muscle Hamster by the name of Caleb Durbin. I found out he was a D3 underdog who was looked over by major schools despite showing all the signs of a great hitter despite being 4'11.
I then noticed that even with his 3'9 frame, Durb had developed some fun pull-side pop in 2024. He launched 10 bombs in 90 MiLB games while stealing 31 bases with a .388 OBP, and then rocked 5 moonshots in 24 AZ Fall League games while stealing 29 bases with a .427 OBP!
Adding in his defensive versatility of 2B/3B/SS/OF, it seemed so obvious to me that this was a major leaguer that I had no choice but to make Caleb Durbin a top-30 prospect ahead of the 2025 season, when no one dared even throw him at the end of their top-100 other than the brave @CBSScottWhite .
Of course, the 2'7 phenom has since gone on to smash all expectations by finishing as a top RoY contender, but I challenge you to dream a little bigger. Folks, this is a profile that offered great walk rates and efficient base stealing. If Durbin can keep hitting 10+ HR with 20-30 SB and *elite* ratios, he will be a very fun player for both fantasy and real life purposes.
His contact rates are through the roof, which leads me to warn you against judging him on his metrics. This is a guy who could wait on pitches, but is fine with chopping down and running out singles like the grinder he is, running as fast as his 1'5 body can take him. As fun as it is in real life, this will weaken stats like his average EV, as he can still decide to turn on a pitch and yank it out when he feels like it. I am guessing he will learn to manipulate the Green Monster quite well.
So, why did it take so long for the world to catch onto the next potential Hall of Pretty Good (@hallofgoodpod) candidate?
Again, the only conclusion to this all is a dirty, dirty word: HEIGHTISM.
If this man was even an inch taller than his 11" stature, then perhaps he'd finally garner the respect his game deserves...
...but he wouldn't be THE DURBINATOR, would he?
PS: here's a pic of his rock-hard nips bulging out of a New York Yankees shirt that you can use when he slugs a grand slam against them to win the ALCS this year.
Enjoy! 🤠
Doc Eisenhauer@DocEisenhauer
THE DURBINATOR ARRIVES. I’m sure you’ve all irrationally been holding onto #Brewers’ Caleb Durbin like I have, utilizing patience and wisdom! Funny enough, I’m less sure what to expect this time. He seems to be less willing to take a walk in his AAA/ST data this year, maybe trading off for some extra pop? Max EV is still low, but his average EVs at AAA are up 6 % points from last year - another indication we may see more big swings from Durbin moving forward. Is this the right move? Don’t wait around to find out - he’s probably sitting on way too many waiver wires right now!
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