
Matt
34.7K posts

Matt
@MatthewDuell
if you’re asking yourself whether something I said is a joke or not, there’s about a 97% chance it’s a joke.



The boats are ablaze ⛵️🔥 Sam Sarver the man that you are



What historical fact sounds fake but is true?

That amount of cleaner says he’s never washed dishes before 😭

Dallas is such a strangely awful place to live. Houston at least has the coast, Austin has tech and culture, and San Antonio is cheaper. But Dallas has... heat and sprawling overpriced suburbs?

It’s been 2 years since Charles Barkley’s evisceration of Galveston

unemployed people be like damn i got a playoff hockey match to watch today

What do you think the average IQ is of people who travel to the NFL draft?



Ah yes, “Texas teens” named Jose Rojas-Alvarado, Oscar Armando Santiago-Martinez, Angel Lemus-Perez, and Carlos Roberto Oliva-Villeda. Good old American names. Texans through and through.

🔥🚨BREAKING: Governor Greg Abott announced that Texas will be a land for the Indian community for as long as he is Governor. This comes after many locals were furious over Indians celebrating Chhat Puja in Denton,Texas rivers.









