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@MaxwellAmerican

I wrote all the dick jokes for Frasier.

USofA Katılım Eylül 2013
769 Takip Edilen115 Takipçiler
MAX
MAX@MaxwellAmerican·
@3YearLetterman time to go to work
Benjamin Lewis@tc1415

Can we please note that it's (almost) never "King Charles". Any of the following are fine though - His Majesty the King - His Majesty - His Britannic Majesty - The King - King Charles III (the III is not optional) - Charles III (never just Charles, you need the III again) - Charles III By the Grace of God of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland and His other Realms and Territories King Head of the Commonwealth Defender of the Faith (ok maybe don't use that one)

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MAX
MAX@MaxwellAmerican·
@AndyStaples We are, in fact, getting older
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Andy Staples
Andy Staples@AndyStaples·
I was doing interviews. Did the Chainsmokers play the song about the woman who stole the mattress?
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AltuveMuse
AltuveMuse@AltuveMuse·
Throwback to when the Rangers were one out away from champions
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MAX
MAX@MaxwellAmerican·
@PowerMizzoucom Well, Gabe, the only way to repair our trust in you is if you take that shirt off.
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PowerMizzou
PowerMizzou@PowerMizzoucom·
My apologies: I got tricked by a fake account on NCAA Tournament tip times. Will wait for official word. Again, my mistake, trying to do too many things at once.
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MAX
MAX@MaxwellAmerican·
@ClueHeywood I always wanted to try out cutting my toenails during boarding but never got the courage.
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Clue Heywood
Clue Heywood@ClueHeywood·
This was a Very Real Thing for those of us over six feet and 250+; it was a temporary salve for the male loneliness epidemic. Look what they’ve taken from us.
Clue Heywood tweet media
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Clue Heywood
Clue Heywood@ClueHeywood·
Southwest proudly advertising “assigned seating is here!” No man I loved the chaos and cheap fares. I loved seeing a fat guy sitting window in an empty row so I took the aisle and we both dared people to take the worst ride of their lives. That was fellowship, and you ruined it.
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MAX
MAX@MaxwellAmerican·
@twelcher15 The nhl orchestrated all of this because they wanted to reduce the chance of injuries to their stars during the season. Thats the price of getting the best players in the world back into this tournament.
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Thomas Welch
Thomas Welch@twelcher15·
Between this and Nathan MacKinnon sobbing about being the better team, I think USA legitimately broke the country of Canada today.
Michael Traikos@Michael_Traikos

Jon Cooper on the 3-on-3 OT: "You take four players off the ice, now hockey’s not hockey anymore. There’s a reason overtime and shootouts are in play — it’s all TV-driven to end games, so it’s not a long time. There’s a reason why it's not in the Stanley Cup final or playoffs"

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MAX
MAX@MaxwellAmerican·
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MAX
MAX@MaxwellAmerican·
@jprutherford Tanking, but with signs of life. Don’t mind it actually.
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MAX
MAX@MaxwellAmerican·
@PowerMizzoucom The Broncos have a guy named Tyler Ba-day, but I remember Mizzou having a guy named Tyler Badie.
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PowerMizzou@PowerMizzoucom·
Pointed out on our message board: All five teams still alive in the NFL playoffs have at least one #Mizzou player on the active roster. A former Tiger is guaranteed to get a Super Bowl ring this year.
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Pat Forde
Pat Forde@ByPatForde·
Touchdown Caines. Great drive. Ole Miss hanging in on the strength of one long run.
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MAX
MAX@MaxwellAmerican·
@PowerMizzoucom Did he apply through the university hiring website?
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MAX
MAX@MaxwellAmerican·
@slmandel Everyone is talking about Notre dame being out, but the actual seedings are horrible and make no sense.
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Keşfet

@3YearLetterman @AndyStaples @AltuveMuse @awfulannouncing @PowerMizzoucom @ClueHeywood @twelcher15 @elonmusk