@TSchwarzbard Is there an accepted definition of Gett Abuse? What exactly does it mean? Is there a legal or clinical definition ?
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End Coercive Custodial Control
37 posts
End Coercive Custodial Control
@EndCCC
Committed to Ending the elements that enable and encourage Coercive Custodial Control in our families and communities.
New York Katılım Haziran 2025
46 Takip Edilen2 Takipçiler
Children who grow up watching their father abuse their mother by holding her hostage in a dead marriage will be permanently scarred and never want a relationship with their father.
THERE IS NO EXCUSE FOR GETT ABUSE.
Lazer NYC 🇺🇸@LazerNYC
PSA: Using children as pawns in a divorce fight, aborting a father out of his children’s life, and aborting children out of their father’s life is equally harmful and abusive to BOTH the parent and the children. Children deserve a healthy relationship with BOTH parents whenever realistically possible. Full stop.
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@LazerNYC @patrickbetdavid It is a very sad story, and our culture of dramatizing peoples divorces on social media with unsubstantiated rumours for everyone's entertainment, harms children.
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Words of wisdom by my great mentor, @patrickbetdavid.
Behind every defeated man, you’ll find a woman who ruined his life.
That’s exactly what happened to Raphi Stein.
Adeena Kohn suffered a severe postpartum psychotic episode in 2020. It led to hospitalization, then the “temporary” move to Monsey for psychiatric treatment.
That one acute breakdown turned permanent: she changed the locks, filed for sole custody, restricted his access to the children, and
One psychotic episode. One man’s life upended.
Patrick Bet-David@patrickbetdavid
If the quote, “behind every great man you’ll find a great women” is true than the opposite is also true. Behind every defeated man, you’ll find a woman who ruined his life. There are 2 ways men get castrated. One is surgical, the other is emotional when marrying the wrong woman
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@therealavichads Under Jewish law, a woman may refuse a gett, just like a man may refuse to give a gett. Jewish marriage deliberately provides these rights to the couple. It is not an error or an oversight that needs to be deleted. There is always the option of not agreeing to a Jewish marriage
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I wonder if the anti gett witholder camp—who say that a woman should receive the gett if she demands regardless so "not to be trapped in a dead marriage"—think that when the husband is the one who wants to give the gett but she refuses (in Halacha it is called "Mesurevet"), she must accept it so "not to live in a dead marriage."
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@ezrieldw @jewishstudent1 @ImrayPhee Also there are certainly things the wife can do to speed up the civil. She is obviously fighting hard.
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@jewishstudent1 @ImrayPhee FYI the accepted practice is for the gett to be done after all the legal stuff has been worked out. Just because the legal process is taking longer than you would like doesn’t make him a gett refuser for wanting to keep to the accepted practice.
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If your wife is holding back custody you don't get to chain her to a radiator in the basement. What @ImrayPhee is doing is comparable. Fuck this douchebag.
#freeadeena
#endgettabuse
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@Ithinkstreet It's tragic how many people obsessively campaign and advocate for some strangers' kids to get a stepfather, yet do nothing about custody abuse that keeps those children from their real, loving, biological fathers
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A religious divorce doesn't "free" children. Freeing children frees children. We need to denormalize weaponizing children in divorces.
Batsheva Schwartzberg@Ithinkstreet
@jewishstudent1 @ImrayPhee More like free the poor children
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@Sarah4plus @Average_NY_Guy @shlishkas There are also no protests and social media campaigns against custodial abusers. Nobody cares about the targeted parent unless there's a gett being demanded.
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@Average_NY_Guy @shlishkas Withholding a gett is terrible, but withholding custody and using children as weapons against your ex is even worse. The gett situation mainly harms the woman, but the custody situation hurts the children too. That’s unforgivable, imo
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If withholding a get from one’s wife is akin to holding her chained to a radiator in the basement, what is a wife preventing a father from seeing his own flesh and blood akin to, and why isn’t it at least as equal a wrongdoing as the former? Please explain.
Jewish Student@jewishstudent1
If your wife is holding back custody you don't get to chain her to a radiator in the basement. What @ImrayPhee is doing is comparable. Fuck this douchebag. #freeadeena #endgettabuse
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@Fred21003640972 @Yakovolf @shlishkas @RabbiApproves In Jewish law, divorce can only be forced if there are grounds. If it a no-fault divorce, you must convince your spouse and/or make them a reasonable offer
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@Yakovolf @shlishkas @RabbiApproves Well said. As I've said, anyone who blames "the rabbi's" for not "supporting agunos" or for "protecting the men" is ignoring that, even assuming he's absolutely wrong, there's literally nothing to be done except כופין אותו עד שאומר רוצה אני or hope he dies
I did an impromptu space to get off my chest all the nonsense I’ve read about the get withholding situation. Tune in if you want to hear me shelt and some דברי חכמה from @RabbiApproves.
שלישקעס@shlishkas
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@DrDanniellex2 @RaphiStein @elievans_untold The notion that women are not capable of abusing the divorce system is itself a major enabler and cause of so much of the custodial abuse in our communities.
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If plaintiff falsely says they’ve removed barriers to defendant's remarriage, NY court will typically withhold final Judgment of Divorce until they comply. Was this the genesis of the “Gett refuser” smear against @RaphiStein? See @elievans_untold exchange with “FlatbushGirl.”
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Yes, I know it’s too much. But there are a lot of questions out there about this seruv, and a man’s reputation has been destroyed over what appears to be halachic malpractice.
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@jaimeruthe @DrDanniellex2 The irony of making basic grammar mistakes when calling someone else "stupid".
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The BDA broke the rules. If you want a Gett, you go to the Beis Din FIRST. Adeena Kohn went to the secular court first. She is not an Agunah. In fact Raphi Stein responded to all this by requesting to transfer the case to Beis Din. Again, this is Halacha. Kohn refused.
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@Sarahwantstosee @jewishstudent1 @ImrayPhee A parent seeing their kids regularly doesn't mean there is no coercive custodial control. We see these cases very often, where the court has stepped in finally, but the controlling part still makes the targeted parent's parenting time as difficult as she can.
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@jewishstudent1 @ImrayPhee If there is no civil divorce or gett and he already told the entire world on a podcast he sees his kids all the time, I am not sure how we are talking about custody.
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@GershyLakier @FrumTikTok Were these terms known about at the time of the wedding?
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@FrumTikTok Fact is women don’t inherently hold custody rights over children the same way men hold the religious authority to grant a get. Equating the two is disingenuous because the underlying power structures are fundamentally different.
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PSA: Any man that refuses to give his wife a get without a reasonable explanation is in the wrong.
Any wife that takes custody of the kids away from her husband without a reasonable explanation is in the wrong.
Unless you're privy to the specific details of a divorce case to discern if it's the former or the latter, you should withhold your opinion on the matter.
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@RabbiPoupko @RaphiStein @ShabbosK "but I do know the extraordinary damage Get refusal does to the Jewish people, to Jewish life, and to Jewish observance"
Do you know (and speak up about) the extraordinary damage that coercive custodial control does to the Jewish people, to Jewish life, and to Jewish observance?
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Between everything that's been going on and you threatening to sue @ShabbosK (an obviously terrible idea) maybe it's time to recalculate your path.
Give your wife a Get. I don't know what's going on in your personal life, but I do know the extraordinary damage Get refusal does to the Jewish people, to Jewish life, and to Jewish observance.
In all my years in the rabbinate I have never seen someone look back on their life and see that refusing a Get has helped them or made their life any better. It is always eternal conflict, resentment, and an entire life in misery when it could have just led to people moving on to create better lives.
We have only one life to live.
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This is completely false and defamatory. If any attorney is willing to bring a lawsuit against Mr. Kestenbaum on a contingency fee structure, please DM.
Shabbos Kestenbaum@ShabbosK
I have just been made aware that a domestic abuser, Raphi Stein, is a follower of mine on social media. Raphi has refused to give his wife Adeena a Gett (Jewish bill of divorce), thereby preventing her from remarrying. Raphi can do so at any moment and is choosing to hold his wife captive instead. In accordance with Jewish Law, Raphi needs to be totally ostracized from our community. Don't speak to him, don't allow him into your Synagogue or school, refuse to sell anything to him. Those who abuse women and children have no role in Jewish life. Raphi if you're reading this: go fuck yourself.
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@ArtemisConsort This is true of Family Law as well.
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If you incentivize something, you get more of it. *Having* a disability, in and of itself, is obviously bad. *Saying* you have one is beneficial.
Same with the SF homelessness problem. Gee, why does the city that’s most accommodating to the homeless have so many homeless?
Jeff Weniger@JeffWeniger
Here is a very normal chart that we shouldn't debate or scrutinize in any way.
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Many such examples with regard to what happens in Family Law
Hunter Ash@ArtemisConsort
If you incentivize something, you get more of it. *Having* a disability, in and of itself, is obviously bad. *Saying* you have one is beneficial. Same with the SF homelessness problem. Gee, why does the city that’s most accommodating to the homeless have so many homeless?
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