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BREAKING: Secretary of State Marco Rubio announced that UNRWA will have no role in aid distribution in Gaza, naming other groups that will. “Not UNRWA, UNRWA became a subsidiary of Hamas.” Source: Israeli Channel 11

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@jakemalasek Khama Khameleon is a Sox fan. Start spreadin the schlitttt

Having to switch entire fucking apps to flip between TNF and Yankees/Red Sox is the closest I’ve come to admitting capitalism was a mistake.

GOOD NEWS PATRIOTS! WITH WASHINGTON SHUT DOWN, I, GAVIN C. NEWSOM, AM NOW THE LEADER OF THE FREE WORLD. MY PLATFORM IS VERY SIMPLE: HEALTH CARE FOR ALL AMERICANS (NO MEASLES!), FREE SCHOOL MEALS (WOW PUDDING FOR EVERYONE), FREE CHILDCARE (THE MOMS LOVE ME! MORE BABIES!!) GOOD-PAYING JOBS, AND NO MORE EVIL TARIFFS!!! EGGS WILL BE FREE. HAIR GEL SUBSIDIES WILL BE AVAILABLE (BUT ONLY FOR HANDSOME DEMOCRATS) AND WE WILL ALSO LEGALIZE CANNABIS! CRIME WILL STAY LOW AND EVERYONE WILL BE HIGH ON PATRIOTISM. AND NO MORE TICKETMASTER FEES (FOR THE SWIFTIES, FEES STAY FOR KID ROCK!) THEY WILL CHANT USA! USA! BECAUSE WE WILL BE BACK AND “HOTTER” THAN EVER BEFORE. THANK YOU! — GCN

On my way home from beating @OfficialJugdish in 36 straight holes and still could’ve managed a better game than Aaron Baboon

Mazel Tov Mohamed @OfficialJugdish

Camera 2. Nasrallah’s funeral. The IAF reminding everyone who’s boss! 💪

@OfficialJugdish Tell it to your suitcase

I imagine this is what goes through Kava’s mind each day

Reports that deposed Syrian dictator Bashar al-Assad has taken refuge in Columbia University's Hamilton Hall not yet verified

There’s little worse than watching college football on a beautiful Saturday. But Watching soccer takes the cake. 🤢🥴

Here’s something you probably never thought would happen: Nasrallah has been eliminated, and there are more people celebrating it in Lebanon today than at Columbia University.

Israel is right not to wait on Harris/Biden for more lectures or support. They will take care of the terrorists on their own with or without us. America should thank Israel for killing America’s enemies. #ThankYouIsrael #AndThatIsHowItsDone

Deport! Arrest! We will not stop we will not rest!

@OfficialJugdish Shut up salt bae

Worst no call I’ve ever seen. Absolute ref show in NY right now. NHL should be ashamed of themselves

The National Guard and State Police should be Immediately Deployed to Columbia University in New York City to Remove what has become a literal Take-Over of the Campus by Pro-Hamas Terrorists living within the United States; if any other Extremist Group were to do the same, this Demonstration would have been Crushed.

Immediately deport all foreign students studying in the USA that support Hamas. We should also revoke federal student loans for any American student arrested for supporting Hamas.

How are they all charging their phones to film the hostages being manhandled out, when the Palestinians told the world on *October 11* that the only power plant had shut down because of a lack of fuel? Do you understand how easily they’ve been taking you for a ride?

These fuel tanks are inside Gaza. They contain more than 500,000 liters of fuel. Ask Hamas if you can have some.

@ThisIsJugdish Likely story

Shut this down. Too many girls!