Brian Costin@BrianCostin
SPRINGFIELD, IL — After what aides are calling “a strong first 50 tries,” Governor J.B. Pritzker announced Friday that Illinois is now “on the verge of a breakthrough” in lowering property taxes—just as soon as lawmakers and voters approve one more tax increase.
“This next one is different,” Pritzker told reporters, standing in front of a chart labeled Plan #51. “The first 50 tax hikes didn’t reduce property taxes, but that’s because we hadn’t raised them quite high enough yet. This one finally gets us over the line.”
The proposal, dubbed the Millionaires’ Tax (But This Time For Real), would place additional taxes on high earners, luxury assets, and “anyone who looks like they might be doing okay.” Administration officials say the revenue will be used to “create the conditions” for property tax relief, which insiders describe as “a very important first step toward someday talking about lowering property taxes.”
State economists confirmed the strategy is based on a “reverse gravity model” of taxation, in which raising one type of tax eventually causes another to fall, “as long as everyone believes hard enough.”
“We’re very close,” said one advisor. “At 49 tax hikes, we were nowhere. At 50, we started to see almost no difference. At 51, we expect similar results—but with renewed optimism.”
Not everyone is convinced.
Brian Costin, Deputy State Director of Americans for Prosperity–Illinois, pointed to neighboring states as a better model.
“States like Indiana have shown you can actually control property taxes with firm caps that protect homeowners,” Costin said. “Indiana’s 1% cap on owner-occupied homes gives taxpayers certainty and forces discipline on government spending. Illinois keeps trying to solve a spending problem with more taxes, and that approach hasn’t delivered relief.”
Illinois homeowners reacted with cautious enthusiasm.
“I didn’t believe it the first 50 times,” said Naperville resident Mark Jensen. “But 51? That’s a nice, round number. Feels right.”
Others expressed relief that the state is staying the course.
“It would be reckless to try something new now,” said one Springfield insider. “We’ve invested too much into this strategy.”
At press time, officials confirmed contingency plans are already in place should the 51st tax increase fail to lower property taxes, including a bold new initiative tentatively titled Just One More.