John Simpson
1.8K posts
John Simpson
@jsimpsonDC
Political flack and political hack. Michigan native and alum living in SEC Country. #Hail
Atlanta, GA Katılım Eylül 2010
1.2K Takip Edilen588 Takipçiler
My daughter just told me that the kids start humming the Jurassic Park theme song when someone responds with “19…” to the question: “When were you born?”…
😲😳😬
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@AjitPai @TedatPolicyband Did you say chauffeur? Particularly apropos for some people today.
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Among new English words in 1900: aviation, chauffeur, electron, garage, monorail, ski, and . . . wireless.
Historic Vids@historyinmemes
Newly added words featured in the 1900 edition of the English dictionary.
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@CourtAnne1225 If they fall from the plug they aren’t dangerous, Courtney.
That Alabama education is working overtime tonight
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@BarstoolBigCat Bad day to be a Stoolie that doesn't know they killed Steve Irwin.
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@jarvis_best This could easily describe X
“the hysterical speeches, the universal understanding that it’s all pointless and won’t amount to anything. It’s fun. I like it.”
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I love the THEATRICS of a good impeachment. The solemn walking of the charges to the Senate, the hysterical speeches, the universal understanding that it’s all pointless and won’t amount to anything. It’s fun. I like it.
Kalshi@Kalshi
BREAKING: 70% chance Trump is impeached again
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Best post of the day!
No Context Brits@NoContextBrits
Isaac Newton discovering Pink Floyd (1660)
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@BarstoolBigCat This is the most barstool “cleanse” I can possibly think of. Your girlfriend is doing like lemongrass tea and water for 3 days. Big Cat is doing a bowl of Lucky Charms, a Lunchable and some Oreos.
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Introducing THE MOST STATE-OF-THE-ART LIVE #TORNADO streaming setup ever deployed!!
What we will attempt in 2026 with the Dominator 3 has never been done before. @willclay25 has designed a live streaming platform that has never been seen on this Planet.
All you can do is stay tuned and buckle up! #Dominator #stormchasing
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The threat our nation faces from Iran is absolutely nothing compared to the possibility of a civil war happening in Houston for Iowa v Nebraska in the Sweet 16 next weekend
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@senatorshoshana A photon walks into a hotel, and the concierge asks, "Do you have any bags?" Photon: "No, I'm traveling light".
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I want more quantum physics jokes in my timeline tyvm
SweetDee@RealUnsweetDee
Ummm…pretty sure you can tho…
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@senatorshoshana Heisenberg is pulled over. Officer: “Do you know how fast you were going?” Heisenberg: “No, but I know exactly where I am”.
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@HarmeetKDhillon Isn’t this the guy that got banned from Waffle House?
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Thank you @ossoff and @ReverendWarnock this is 100% on you.
CBS News@CBSNews
Some travelers have had to wait in line for five hours at Atlanta’s Hartsfield-Jackson International Airport as TSA wait times across the country are getting even longer due to a nationwide staffing crisis tied to the ongoing government shutdown.
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@3YearLetterman @emilyetaylor23 Probably just for the poors on Android.
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@emilyetaylor23 Why can’t I dislike this tweet?
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I don’t know all of the logistics, but I do know this button was created so we can all properly engage with @3YearLetterman tweets.
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No one is making liver, like, ever.
Fit_Fusion@FitFusion__
Everyone's making liver like this after seeing this genius idea
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Good
Why do you struggle with that?
Margaret Brennan@margbrennan
The Secretary of Defense tells the American public to pray for our troops on bended knee and invoke Jesus' name....
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Every day I am bullied on this website
Jarvis@jarvis_best
It’s a beautiful day and these bad boys are getting some mileage
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