Lowell Davis

Absolute trash customer service after a completely unacceptable mistake. The guy even told me “be sure to bring it next time”. We’re planning to not include fundamental ingredients again soon?

Hey @McDonalds. Not only did your Boone, IA store manage to not put beef patties on two cheeseburgers that I ordered for my kid, but they also had an attitude and treated me like I was at fault when I came back to the drive-thru because I didn’t bring the bag to show them. 1/2

This is GLORIOUS David Letterman & Stephen Colbert on the roof of the Ed Sullivan Theatre bringing back the classic @Letterman routine one last time This is how you go out, @StephenAtHome! 😂 And may @CBS implode literally the same way without you

Jonathan Frakes 'Beyond Belief' clips played at half speed make him sound like a drunk dude at the bar

In honor of 4/20, here's a clip from Norm Macdonald's show that should be far more widely viewed and appreciated. There's a reason I call 4/20 "Hold the Fort Day." 😂 (We need to bring back "hold the fort" as a saying, too.) Happy 420, ya old chunk of coal.

GOOD VIBES ONLY YOU DUMB SON OF A BITCH

With @HiMyNameIsSeton leaving the on air portion of @dpshow, the big question is: will he still be part of the 2027 calendar? The people need to know.

Watching the @Cubs on @WatchMarquee. Easter wiener sighting.

@Jims4x4toy That is fantastic.

@ring what’s the ETA for Thanksgiving and Christmas doorbell/chime sounds? It would be awesome if you’d just leave them as available all year but I’d settle for knowing when they’ll be enabled this year.

@dalepartridge Fuck off Dale.

Today, my family went on a family trip to Flagstaff. We walked into a quaint sandwich shop, and a young woman approached to take our order. She was wearing a sports bra and crack-sucking leggings. It was the kind of outfit our grandmothers would see as lingerie. Had I not been with my family, I would have said something like, “Ma'am, do you not know how inappropriate your outfit is? Are you not ashamed to be wearing that in public?” So, when I got home, I wrote the owner. This won’t change until we make it change. Make sin shameful again. Remember, shame pushes people to see their need for forgiveness—in Christ.

Hey @iRobot - after AWS shit the bed, the Roomba maps are gone for my house. Any chance they’ll magically reappear as everything comes back online or do I have to start over?

These guys are called Crabsmack and they only play covers of famous songs, but change the lyrics to make the songs about eating Crab/crablegs.

My thoughts on the Riyadh Comedy Festival. officialdavidcross.com/blogs/press/my…

Gary Cohen wasn't sold on the way the Cubs and Matt Shaw handled his absence to attend Charlie Kirk's memorial. "I don't want to talk about any of the politics of it, but the thought of leaving your team in the middle of a race for any reason other than a family emergency, really strikes me as weird."

@GRitz93 lol. Smd

@lowelldavis I feel so bad for your kid(s). Their dad is a pathetic loser lmao

At least Cade Horton didn’t get pulled early to attend a rally disguised as a memorial.

@Pdonk24 😂

@lowelldavis What a douche bag comment. I hope your wife’s boyfriend f*cks her the right way

@RealistMidwest 😂

@lowelldavis The face of evil is Lowell D

@jayscout99 Smd

@lowelldavis This is horrible. Go root for the Brewers.