🌻🇺🇦Hangry!

@WillieHandler Depends, do you like eating add or head?

So what is the proper technique for eating a chocolate bunny? Head first? Split the sucker open? Tail first?

@medcat33 Underwear. Free the boys.

Is there a male equivalent to taking your bra off after a long day

Imagine a white judge in Ohio mad about a verdict where a black man wins.... #afromantrial Won fair and square, only racist are losing their shit.

@CheburekiMan It's always funny when the bullies get a taste of their own medicine.

Tel Aviv Mayor Ron Huldai: "We are destroyed. We are living in shelters for weeks now. Why exactly are we the ones suffering right now? We are the chosen people!" Life's tough, get a helmet.

@JayJurden If you blow him right, he will stay inflated. No cpap needed.

I know his wife gets sick of all of those gay men throwing their CPAP machines onstage at him 🐻

@pepsi Coca-Cola and some blow.

name a better combo than Pepsi + pizza. we’ll wait.

@kathleenmadigan With the way the FFA is running the towers, it's a 50/50 shot of making it at this point. I vote with you.

From 1994 to 2001, I flew every week w no TSA. Just somebody w a wand who really didn't give a shit. If we get a vote, I vote lets go back to "just get on the plane and take our chances." Anybody else? Maybe its just me. #governmentshutdown.

Some tips to save on fuel:

@VacksceneGaming Talk about small dick energy.

LOLOLOL What a fucking joke

Due to the Democrat’s Shutdown, I’ve asked the Financial Clerk of the Senate to hold my salary. It’s not right for Members of Congress to be paid if the working men and women of DHS aren’t.

This is what happens when an Iranian missile, with a 100 kg warhead and cluster munitions, strikes the civilian heart of Tel Aviv. Imagine the global outrage if this was London, Paris or Berlin. Yet because it’s the Jewish state, the world is SILENT!

@YosephHaddad Burn baby burn!

A ballistic missile in the middle of a residential neighborhood! This is what happened today in Tel Aviv. Day after day after day we are witnessing war crimes by the Iranian regime, and the world continues in its indifference!

@hughtapes Good God, I would ride those thighs till I died.

just imagine alan ritchson punching you

@ronsterd89 Grab it one hand while holding something grounded with the other hand, for safety.

charger prong stuck in the plug. Can I just grab it and pull it out

@RogerJStoneJr Cry harder.

Robert Mueller ordered the 6 am raid on my home by 29 heavily armed FBI Agents and perp walked my wife for CNN's cameras

@cwebbonline I do, and I have argued for 24 cents....

We need to start taking pictures of the shelf prices because they might change by the time we get to the register. 📌 Walmart is rolling out digital price tags in every store. Prices can now be changed across the entire chain in seconds.

@TONYxTWO I hope the dems burn it all to the ground.

“So I just finished my 12 hour shift at TSA just now. Work 4:00AM to 4:30PM and still not getting paid for it. Fun stuff. So Congress, if you would do us all the favor of figuring your sh*t out… that would be great.” Thank a Democrat for this

@Marcela252016 Yes.

Si un compañero tiene auto y vive cerca de mi casa, me lleva al trabajo todos los días, estoy obligada a darle para la gasolina?

@MysterySolvents He's looking at his @Grindr grid.

What is Lindsay Graham googling?

@AbsurdApparatus @Pirat_Nation And a US built router can't?

@Pirat_Nation its because routers can detect where people are in a room. there are videos of people doing it with open software.