Tesla Johnson *Alfalfa Male* (Parody)

@KahrsJeffreyW @HotDevTakes @Cockadoodle_Boo Check this out...

@KeruboSk This is why you have to pay for a pizza before they'll deliver it to your house...

Client: "We've decided not to proceed. Cancelling the project." Freelancer: "Delivery was tomorrow." Client: "Something came up internally." Freelancer: "Kill fee applies. 75% of the remaining balance." Client: "For work you haven't delivered?" Freelancer: "For work that's completely done." Client: "We're not paying for something we're not using." Freelancer: "Section 5. It's been ready since Monday." Kill fee paid. Cancelling the day before delivery is still cancelling. Done work has the same value whether it gets used or not.

The breathtaking hypocrisy of this is off the charts. Trump’s ex-wife was killed too. But not by ISIS. She fell down the stairs at home. The day before she was to testify to his malfeasance. He buried her on his golf course. He was no longer with her at the time. He’d left her to shack up with his pregnant girlfriend. Who was donated to him by Jeffrey Epstein. When SHE gave birth he was sleeping with a Porn Star. But hey, Joe Kent remarried four and a half years after Isis killed the mother of his kids that he’d been raising alone…

@stabmarine @taylor85575 @KatiePMcGrady

@taylor85575 @KatiePMcGrady I’ve been a loyal AA customer for years. Never experienced the anger a lot of folks have. Sure. Things don’t always go as planned but they have always made things right.

@mazemoore @CollinRugg Yeah, at video games maybe...

@CollinRugg I don't care how many steroids he does, I could take him.

NEW: The neighbor who was allegedly punched by actor Alan Ritchson, explains to TMZ how the incident started, says he told the actor to "slow it down." "I did push him because he was coming towards me on his, on his bike." "He did it again for a second time. I pushed him a second time, and I think the second time he got off his bike and kicked the crap outta me." Video: @TMZ

Hot take: Southern hospitality is a myth. You guys are very sarcastic and oddly unkind in situations where it’s not really warranted.

@LupusBeowulf @JoeTipton @TransferPortal @On3 @WesMitchellGC @DRobertsMedia @GamecockCentral @Barstool_Cocks @GCockRecruiting @FamouslyGarnet @TypicalGamecock Should keeping mid players be a priority if the goal is to improve?🤔

@JoeTipton @TransferPortal @On3 @WesMitchellGC @DRobertsMedia @GamecockCentral @Barstool_Cocks @GCockRecruiting @FamouslyGarnet @TypicalGamecock South Carolina can't even keep their mid players lol

NEWS: South Carolina guard Eli Ellis plans to enter the @TransferPortal, he told @On3. The 6-0 freshman averaged 8.6 points, 2.8 rebounds, and 2.0 assists per game this season. Former back-to-back OTE MVP. on3.com/news/south-car…

@RealtimeREDneck civileats.com/2024/09/18/jd-…

THE NEBRASKA FIRE THAT-NO-NEWS-IS-REPORTING IS NOW HEADING TOWARDS A MILLION ACRES: Getting word from Nebraskans that the motive behind this Lahaina-like fire-event in their state might be burning out swathes of farmland and cattle ranches and seizing access to water. Not just any water. But an entire massive aquifer that undergirds much of the state. So what takes that amount of water? Umm...could it be data centers? FOUR are slated for Nebraska. What say you, Nebraskans?

@itcantbeajoke @RealtimeREDneck @MissKatyAllison civileats.com/2024/09/18/jd-…

@RealtimeREDneck @MissKatyAllison Any guess who happened to buy a bunch of farm land in Nebraska? You got it, Billy Boy Gates👎 x.com/itcantbeajoke/…

@Haeze @oelma__ She already has the cans... ...you are of no help 🙄

@oelma__ In my experience, frozen green beans are about the same price per volume, and don't have the nasty flavor of the canned ones. I'd recommend just buying a few bags of frozen ones.

What can I put in canned green beans to improve their flavor? I hate them, but we're on a budget and have plenty of them.

@oelma__ Drain them. Then use clean water or broth, add butter, maybe even some bacon or sausage 🤷‍♂️, add some salt/pepper/garlic seasoning. Enjoy😋 Keep it simple.

@sixfootcandy @tylerdurdenhi Double cheeseburger was on the $1.00 until after long after 9/11/2001... ...And it was bigger. Big Mac combo was $4.99 until 2010 or so.

@tylerdurdenhi How much were McDonalds cheeseburgers? They were less than a dollar, right?

As a Gen Xer, I can tell you boomers and even my own generation comparing their 20s to today’s 20-30 year-olds needs to stop. I paid $600 for a West Hollywood apartment at 23. Today it’s $3500. Burgers weren’t $20, they were $6 to $8 in a nice restaurant. Life is not comparable. It’s a completely different world now.

Slavery was legal. People who freed slaves were criminals. Segregation was legal. People who stood up for equality were criminals. I heard this story once about a teacher who took a fish out of its bowl and left a classroom of children as it flopped around.. telling them that if anyone left their seat, they would be expelled. All of the children sat and watched as this fish flopped gasping for air, not wanting to get up in order to avoid getting in trouble. Finally, a girl sprang up from her seat and ran to the fish, placing it back in the bowl. Ultimately, she was the only one who refused to watch the fish die. When the teacher returned he told the class that this was a lesson. That the fear of getting in trouble should never stop you from doing what's right. That sometimes.. you may have to oppose authority and group think, simply because it's the right thing to do. Never use legality as a guide to morality.

@dogwoodblooms @KritterKS They pay shitloads of money to eat what they say they don't every time they go to a movie... ...and when they do, they load it up with BUTTER, not sugar.

@KritterKS Go stand in the corner! 👉🏼

Let’s go ahead and clear this up: There ain’t no native born North Carolinians putting sugar on grits. 💁🏼‍♀️

@Thumbs0311 @UPS @uscpsycho @AmazonHelp Its against the law to fire someone in California...

@UPS @uscpsycho @AmazonHelp This is all you need too look into and fire them. There are tons of people that would love to have the money that this driver makes. Having a lazy employee isn't a good look for you. Im sure she has been complained about 1000 times and you just refuse to do anything.

I had a @UPS pick up for a large item return to @amazon. UPS driver just rang the doorbell and ran away. No attempt to actually lick up the item! Had to pay for this pick up, so not happy.

@juniorkingpp Because not all restaurants are corporations and the culture in America has always been that service is paid in tips, salary.

I don’t understand why we keep shifting the blame to customers needing to tip, and not corporations needing to pay their employees livable wages .

@oelma__ Republican lawmaker🤷‍♂️

Anyone..

@twix bits are just @Whoppers that are sold in a bag instead of box...