This isn't the Dave you're looking for

I've noticed a lot of people crying victim that Elmo is doing this and that to "silence" them in order to sucker in the sympathy engagement. Why is Elmo throwing all of this in my face? Please like if you agree.

@fuckyouiquit @PatriotSassy Give Mamdani the voice of Bernie Sanders: boom, Jesus.

@PatriotSassy Thinking the pope isn’t a political figure is hilarious. Thinking Jesus wasn’t a socialist is even funnier.

I am a practicing Catholic. Have been all my life, waaaayyyy over half a century. But I’ve had it with these damn popes getting political!! I couldn’t stand Pope Francis. 😤 We catholics are taught to believe that the pope is divinely chosen. That he is infallible. But I’m sorry, this one and the last one are hardly infallible. 😒 I had hopes for Leo but I had also heard that he was a liberal early on. Already, I can see he’s no better than Francis. Please, stop making Catholics feel like we have to choose. Because I’ll choose Jesus always, but you are NOT Jesus!! I will NOT change my stance on my president! I will support him, however, the one thing I CAN control? How much money I put in the kitty every week. 💰 And right now, I’m not putting ANY money in that’s intended for Rome. Until the holy father stays out of our politics, he gets not one. red. cent. from me! His job is to lead people to Christ like a shepherd, not to “pontificate” on @POTUS @DonaldTrump! @Pontifex

And often leaves them on the cushions.

@ElxMapping @realpublicius And often leaves them on the cushions.

visits the pope → pope dies leads Iran negotiations → talks collapse flies to Hungary to prop up Orbán → Orbán loses in a landslide Man’s got a streak.

@greta You can fuck right off, Greta. Check the community notes.

I hope Canada thanks the USA for the ride on Artemis 2….

@SundaeDivine @DarrigoMelanie He has way more experience turning stuff into shit than he has building anything.

@DarrigoMelanie He had four years and never built a wall, but he'll annihilate a civilization in an hour.

Trump is bragging about how many more war crimes he could commit.

@NancyMartin2021 @MeidasTouch Magasexual: willing to fuck anything or anyone that is perceived to improve one's stature.

@MeidasTouch Is trump gay?

Trump at a UFC event last night told fighter Paulo Costa he’s too good-looking to fight. “You’re a beautiful guy. You could be a model, you look so good.” This was what Trump was doing as negotiations with Iran imploded.

@mariana057 It tainted her reputation.

In Local News, a Woman tries to cut of her lovers Penis, Instead she Missed and cut his thigh. She is currently being charged with a misdaweiner.

@mariana057 I don't think she had the balls.

@mariana057 That's mean.

@billifer1973 @iamAtheistGirl Gonna tattoo this one my forehead. One day.

@iamAtheistGirl Avoidance procrastination. Ask me how I know 😭

besides annoying what is called when you really need to do something and you know you’ll feel better when it’s done but you just can’t bring yourself to do it? 😭

I will freely admit that I am not seen because my content is shit.

@DocAtCDI @JanetCa03023777 Oh, THAT one...

@DaveAfternoon @JanetCa03023777 youtube.com/watch?v=9DGfd2…

I passed my Canadian citizenship test! I got an Eh +

@DocAtCDI @JanetCa03023777 You got me stumped there, Doc.

@DaveAfternoon @JanetCa03023777 the weasel would like a word

@JanetCa03023777 @DocAtCDI Well, yes, but that's not the title of the song now is it

@DaveAfternoon @DocAtCDI Pop in my part of Canada

@The_Middlelman @RubenNorseman @WallyPetersIV I have already read about all of these details over the past number of years. But by all means, consider it manufactured because you claim to not know about it

@DaveAfternoon @RubenNorseman @WallyPetersIV Do you?

Dear MAGA, Just out of curiosity: If president Biden had banged porn stars, cheated on multiple wives, lied 30,000 times, singlehandedly and unilaterally started a war, released 5,000 Talibanis, bombed a school, bungled the Covid response, added trillions to the deficit, claimed windmills cause cancer, abandoned veterans, bombed 8 countries in one year, altered a weather map with a Sharpie, praised Allah in an Easter message, slept through numerous meetings, threatened to bomb another nation back to the Stone Ages because 'they're animals', violated the Constitution’s emoluments clause, sided with Vladimir Putin over U.S. intelligence agencies, revealed highly classified information to Russian officials in the Oval Office, and golfed when dead service members returned home, would you think it was okay and support his right to do so? If not, then why let Trump get away with it?

@8WithaTiara @MJ_Still_ Her avi is unbelievable.

if you don’t like me, talk to my bestie @MJ_Still_ she handles all that😊

@SundaeDivine Is he really trying, though?

Trump is running foreign policy like a WWE promo while Vance is trying to save his ass.

@EZKO70 @MonstrOnTheMind

Stop calling marijuana a drug. Drugs come from laboratories, not Mother Nature's sweet bountiful vagina.

@AdamPollock @NaialCasanovas The good stuff is made with Irish cream?

@NaialCasanovas Compared to other Irish butters yeah

Americans don’t know this, but in Ireland this stuff costs the equivalent of 20 cents