Joette

@rickygervais It’s exciting to see new members of Talking Bollocks on YouTube but I’m not sure they are all going to be willing to be part of a social media GANG! @BollocksGang @rickygervais you’re gonna have to have them go through the initiation of random #afterlife quotes texted to friends!

Started off as quite an interesting masterclass about writing and stand up, but then descended into talking about having feet without legs and hands without arms. Please subscribe 😂 youtube.com/watch?v=OxUgIH…

@rickygervais Can you please tell me what streaming/social media platform you plan to use the most so I can see your most current faffing about. Thanks! @rickygervais

Please subscribe to my YouTube channel you lazy cunts youtube.com/watch?v=QgFuEu…

@GlobalBowen @rickygervais clearly he doesn't want guitar lessons.

Ricky Gervais laughs way too much in his podcasts. Is it really that funny? I honestly don’t find him funny. I think he's fucking stupid.

Hell yeah, MeeMaw. You get to a certain age and you say “Fvck it, I don’t care what anyone thinks.” Wear your Pomeranian tee shirt, have a cocktail, and let loose.

@JaneFallon hmmm if it included the phrase "surrounded by all her friends". I think we might know the culprit ....

@MOSSADil @grok can you translate this and is is real or ai

🚨 SUPER LOW-ALTITUDE RESCUE MISSION OVER IRAN U.S. aircraft are flying low-altitude reconnaissance and search operations over hostile territory, scanning for two downed pilots. What’s happening: • Combat search-and-rescue mission underway • Aircraft flying low to avoid detection and locate survivors • High-risk environment deep inside enemy territory Black Hawk helicopters and rescue teams are believed to be part of the operation, racing against time. Every minute matters. Stay connected, follow @MOSSADil

@lndc_italia @grok can you tell me what happened to this cat and how it sustained injuries

Grazie alle cure, la piccola Rosi sta lentamente migliorando e ha ripreso a nutrirsi da sola ❤️💪🏻. La situazione resta delicata, ma i progressi ci danno speranza. Restiamo fiduciosi e continuiamo a starle accanto con affetto, facendo tutti il tifo per lei 🥰

@rickygervais @rickygervais you might need to make one for cats just to make sure you don't offend the wrong animals @PickliciousF .

This annoys all the right people.

@HustleBitch_ My uncle is a vet.He taught me to pinch my biting puppy on the side of it's muzzle.That is what mom dogs do to discipline nippy pups.Also, don't get a pup at 8 weeks wait until 10 weeks bc their dog mom sharp bites them through this phase.@MarthaStewart has flat teeth so relax.🤪

🚨 MARTHA STEWART SAYS SHE BITES HER PUPPIES ON THE MOUTH HARD “UNTIL THEY SQUEAL” — AND THE INTERNET IS LOSING IT Martha Stewart is on camera holding a puppy… smiling… and then casually says: “I bite the animal right here on its mouth hard… and it squeals.” She says that’s how it knows she’s the mother. This isn’t off-camera. This isn’t taken out of context. She says it like it’s completely normal. And the reaction? The internet is split and it’s getting heated. “This is weird as hell” “She shouldn’t be allowed to own a pet” “She learned this in prison” “WTF did I just watch?” But then others are pushing back: “Dogs do this to each other… y’all are overreacting.” “This is literally how animals establish dominance.” Half the internet thinks this is completely normal. The other half thinks it’s insane she said it out loud. Is this normal behavior… or is this crossing a line?

@PeterEgan6 Remember..."Death cannot stop true love. All it can do is delay it for awhile." ~ Princess Bride

Hi I just want to mark today. It’s 5yrs since I lost Myra to cancer. She was a wonderful remarkable partner & soul mate. I miss her all the time & I celebrate the life we had together. Life is such a beautiful gift it’s why I campaign so hard for those from whom it is stolen.

@jk_rowling @elonmusk @LudicrousMonica @grok I need to know how much @elonmusk loves Harry Potter. Has he read the books?

@LudicrousMonica It's going to be incredible. I'm so happy with it.

Hey @jk_rowling The trailer for the new Harry Potter looks bloody marvellous. I cannot wait, and as it seems to me, neither can the rest of the world❤️🪄

@BreitbartNews @grok is this an optimus robot

A humanoid robot, who walked into a White House event with First Lady Melania Trump, introduced "herself" in somewhat of a valley girl accent.

@HustleBitch_ @Amtrak needs to step up it's game. Trains to the rescue!

🚨 HOUSTON AIRPORT COLLAPSES OVERNIGHT — TSA SHUT DOWN, PASSENGERS LEFT SLEEPING ON THE FLOOR UNTIL 3:30AM This is inside IAH (George Bush Intercontinental Airport) at 3–4AM. TSA wasn’t slow… it wasn’t backed up… it was shut down. • Lines stretched from the basement through the terminal • Zero movement for hours • People missing flights before security even opened • Entire sections of IAH turned into a makeshift sleeping area Look at the floor. Suitcases everywhere. People using backpacks as pillows. Dozens laid out across the terminal just waiting for TSA to come back. Hours go by… Then at 3:30AM, security finally reopens. By then, people had already spent the entire night stranded inside the airport. If this is normal now… what’s next?

@HustleBitch_ Until it starts folding my laundry and cleaning the house I will not be impressed. 🙃

🚨 THIS IS THE EXACT MOMENT HUMANS LOST CONTROL — AND EVERYONE’S BLINDLY APPLAUDING Watch closely. • Melania Trump steps out… completely expressionless • A humanoid robot walking beside her • Movements almost perfectly mirrored • No hesitation… no reaction… like this is normal now This doesn’t feel like innovation. It feels like the line just disappeared. People aren’t even questioning it. They’re watching and accepting it like it’s already part of the world. If this is what they’re showing you in public… what’s already happening behind closed doors?

RIVER RESCUE: Police in upstate New York rescued a stranded goldendoodle from the middle of the Seneca River using a helicopter. The shivering pup was safely pulled aboard, wrapped in blankets, and brought to shore.

@Art71Rachael I thought you took him for new tats lololol

Had to take Mart to the eye centre so he could be reminded that he has not one but two eyes 😆😆🤣

@rickygervais This may be the BEST looking award ever with all the animals on it! It has a little @JaneFallon reaching for @rickygervais chimp hand on it . Almost like designed it 🤣.

Thanks to The Jane Goodall Institute UK for my “Unwavering Advocacy for Animals” Award. It’s going on the shelf!

@JaneFallon @marksandspencer I found after my surgery I apparently had done a lot of online shopping on meds. At one point I was hot. 2 days later my husband was bringing in 4 fans I ordered from Amazon and have zero memory of doing so! Happy opioid shopping !

Also, all my clothes have to be front-fastening for a while, so I bought these PJs from ⁦@marksandspencer⁩ and I think they’re rather fabulous

@JaneFallon Cats purr at a healing frequency so @PickliciousF is just giving follow up treatment ❤️

The popsox have to stay on for 48 hours so that’s nice. Then 8-10 days wait for confirmation that they’ve got it all & the margins are clear (small % chance of more surgery if not). Pickle has started her first shift. Apparently trampling all over me is standard medical practice

So… I had my op today. I’m feeling remarkably fine, which is possibly the drugs & that might also explain why I’m cross eyed in pic 4). I had quite a lovely couple of hours drinking tea & reading the brilliant @CatSteadman ‘s new one (more on that later

@wewantruth @rickygervais

@rickygervais Got mine in New Jersey USA!

You can now get Dutch Barn duty free at Luton Airport. Also, check out our Easter Bundles at dutchbarn.com