MKMatoosh

@TheMon1010 @ShitpostRock You get Space Canadians

@CW23CW @SmirkingDamsel I don't know what they are, the closest thing they would be to in England is a sad looking version of toad-in-the-hole. They are definitely not pigs in blankets, THESE are pigs in blankets (sausages wrapped in bacon)

@SmirkingDamsel These are what we consider sausage rolls where I'm from in the U.S. You can get them at donut shops. They are really good with mustard on them.

I just sent a photo of the sausage rolls I made today to a lovely American guy I’m talking to…. He replied… “I don’t think I’ve ever had a sausage roll 😳” Wait, WHAT?!? Do Americans not eat sausage rolls?!

@TheCinesthetic The Expanse

Which TV show never had a decline in quality?

@amazingmap And God said: "Fuck Australia in particular"

Earth’s Impact Craters

@Nick_Pettigrew A photo of the canvas I had made from the photo... Three surfers walking across a misty Westward Ho! beach in 2010

Five years ago today I took the best photo I’ll probably ever take. I like good photos and have a four hour bus journey shortly so need entertaining. Feel free to reply with the best photo you ever took. Accompanying description also welcome.

@andydupertuis @skdh One in imperial so the Americans can understand. And 'limited' to 125mph (~210kph) so the passenger didn't get scared. *Taken by the passenger

Finally a topic I can speak about competently! Speed limits on German highways. Or rather the absence thereof. This seems to be a thing of eternal fascination for Americans. Yes it's true that German highways don't have speed limits -- in some stretches. Yes, it's true that in principle you can go there as fast as you want (though you need to avoid liftoff, that's not legal). And yes, you can rent a car in Germany and give it a try, provided you have a reasonable driver's licence. (US/Canada/EU etc are all good.) In practice, it's rare to find enough space to drive faster than 200 km/h for any extended stretches. And to say the hopefully obvious, easier to do it at night than in the rush hour. That said, almost all consumer car speeds top out at 250 km/h anyway, that's about 155 mph. Though if you have the money or the skills you can get above that. In any case, in reality, you will almost never see a car go faster than 250 km/h for that reason -- too expensive, too useless. The most important difference you need to know between US and German traffic regulations is that in Germany you are not allowed to pass a car on the right. You need to pass left. For this reason, speeding only happens on the left lane. The most dangerous part about fast driving on German highways is not fast driving itself, it's slow drivers cutting into the left lane, while a much faster car is coming up behind. The reason this rarely happens is that the passing-left-only rule in practice leads to a speed-sorting on lanes. Trucks on the far right, slow vehicles second from right. Third lane you get people going 150-200 or so, and on the far left you get those who are really, really in a hurry or think their car needs a workout. This is a typical situation you might encounter on a 4-lane motorway. Once you get used to it, it's not as scary as it sounds. Though I on occasion pick up British or American people from the airport and let me just say they tend to get somewhat nervous. I drive an Audi A4 TFSI. Yes, it goes 250 km/h. Yes, I make use of that. No, it's not my husband's car. Yes, I like fast cars. No, I don't want speed limits on German highways. x.com/dvassallo/stat…

@ArchieDuke14 @RDPHistory My grandad was 14th/20th Hussars who provided mobility for 2/6 Gurkhas in Italy. He never really spoke about the war, but one of things he would say was "Thank God I was on their side."

@RDPHistory My late father had the pleasure of meeting these lads in the Second World War and summed it up by saying "Thank God, they were on our side!" All the best.

June 1st 1982: The "Little men from Nepal" arrive in the Falklands. Argentina is terrified of the legendary Gurkhas and the junta begin a propaganda war which backfires, frightening their own men witless. They even complained to the UN that Gurkhas should not be allowed to fight.

@anon_opin But is a Jason Derulo song really a Jason Derulo song unless Jason Derulo says Jason Derulo?

Songs that start with the artists namedropping themselves are usually shite

Lunchtime blast around the concrete and roundabouts of #MK

@PghMackem @sophie_gadd He had a map of London and couldn't understand why we couldn't walk between the ones that are "close together" and get a quick taxi for the ones further out. Couldn't understand the scale of London and how long it takes to get anywhere

@MKMatoosh @sophie_gadd Madness. When I lived in Tottenham it would sometimes take me longer to get back from a game at Selhurst on a weekday night than one in Sunderland on a Saturday afternoon.

absolutely LIVE for these kind of posts on Reddit: "hi we are flying to London and this is our itinerary, thoughts?" - Day 1 - London - Day 2 - Edinburgh -Day 3 -Drive to Isle of Sky -Day 4 - The Cotswolds/Stone Henge -Day 5 - Cornwall/The Cotswolds -Day 6 - Fly home

@declan1968 @sophie_gadd He wanted to go inside each of them, take photos with trophies etc. He couldn't get his head around the scale of London, he thought we could walk or get a quick taxi between them

@MKMatoosh @sophie_gadd What did he want to do at each venue? It wouldn't be impossible if it was just to have a quick look and move on I'd have thought.

@Pal_action @RAF_Luton can the UK's foremost RAF base (just of the A1081) confirm the existence of "Apache fighter jets"?

@paul_haine *Tablespoon* Yeah, that's not... *2nd tablespoon* Um, I really think... *Folds the bread over* Fuck it, I need to see this!

@goteach_Denmark @paul_haine Comparing Dijon mustard to English mustard is like comparing mayonnaise to chilli sauce. Don't breathe out through your nose unless you want to clear your sinuses and start crying 👍

@paul_haine Don't think I ever tried British mustard.. how does it compare to Dijon or similar mustards?

@anon_opin Or when you hold a *concept* review and there's always that one person asking why every single little detail hasn't been solved yet

If I tell you it's a rough mockup and you then start pointing out small layout issues then you are a fucking idiot.

@NoContextBrits Black pudding, straight in the bin 🤮

You have to lose one item. Which is it?

@NoContextBrits Nah, put 'absolute' in front of upper class crumpet and you're there 👌🏼

This might be the most British insult I’ve ever seen.

@SoVeryBritish ⚠️Reports of increased radio traffic at Devonport and Chivenor. ⚠️Residents of Launceston warned to remain inside their properties ⚠️ Mary Berry appeals for calm

@SoVeryBritish Ukraine, Gaza, Yemen and now you're trying to get Devon and Cornwall to kick off?

Did I do it right?