Gary Osburg

Realising your dream takes work But you don't know what to do first What you need is a framework to give you a clear route forward Here it is (FREE!)👇 garyosburg.gumroad.com/l/vytpd

@Adequacity @ukboomers Have you noticed that since they took the lead out of petrol its price has gone through the roof (which young people moan about too!). They can't have it both ways

@ukboomers Next they’ll be meaning about lead in the paint. It never ends with people like this.

Tenants in our second buy to let found some asbestos pipes. It was there when we bought the place in 1994 and it never bothered us. We lived with it for years. What's the fuss? We told them to leave it alone but they want a specialist. £3,000 they quoted us. Our handyman Dave said he'd rip it out for £200 cash. Problem solved. Back in our day we just got on with it. 🇬🇧

@2147mill Charlie Munger made the $100k comment sometime in the early 60s. The equivalent amount today is closer to a million

You know Buffet says how once you hit £100k portfolio that’s when the snowball really takes off… I hit £116k October 2025 and since then it’s gone back to £100k🤣🤣 When does the snowball start?

@2147mill Next time my son breaks something playing rugby I'm going to deal with it privately, then tell him the cost is coming out of his inheritance and remind him to be more careful with his one and only life

Controversial opinion: The UK should have no NHS. We should take responsibly for our own health, our own emergency savings and not be so reliant on the state.

@Jenny_1884 @RachelT1722 The average house at the time cost about 3X the average salary. The average house now costs about 8X the average salary. That's all you need to know

@RachelT1722 But wages were low so most went on paying the mortgage.

When I married in 1981 we both worked & most of our salary went on paying the mortgage as the interest rate was 15% at the time. Everything we owned was 2nd hand & we never went out for meals as we couldn’t afford to. We rented our TV Went to the launderette every weekend as had no washing machine. Only had new clothes at Xmas & birthdays as presents. We went without until we could save enough to pay for something. It’s always been hard whether you are young or old. So those out there that think we had it easy we didn’t. Our governments are to blame, not the old.

@shaxphere @chasedownleads Tell us you've never been in a sauna without telling us you've never been in a sauna

Walked by a homeless guy last night "Please, I haven't eaten in 3 days. Can you buy me dinner?" I could hear the pain in his voice. He wasn't asking for money to buy drugs or beer. He needed food. Plus we happened to be right in front of a pizza place. Went in and got him a small pizza. He thanked me. I was walking away when I turned back and noticed something crazy: He threw the pizza away, then started asking the next person for food. Gave them the same sob story. Furious, I ran back to him. What the hell man? That's when I recognized him. It was Papa John himself. Pulling off a genius sales hack. No wonder he's a billionaire.

@irentdumpsters Do you post job photos on the profile itself, as posts, or both?

A roofing company owner told me last week he's paying $4,200 a month for Google Ads. I asked him how many calls he got last month. He said "I don't know, maybe 20?" I pulled up his Google Business Profile. He had 9 reviews. His last post was from November. His website had one page with a stock photo of a roof and a phone number. He was dumping $4,200 a month into ads trying to outbid his competitors while his GBP looked like an abandoned storefront. I told him to pause the ads for 60 days. We optimized his profile, posted weekly with real job site photos, and set up a review system that got him from 9 to 54 reviews in 8 weeks. He now ranks #2 in the Map Pack. Gets 43 organic calls a month. His ad spend is $0. He told me "I wish someone had shown me this 2 years ago. I wasted $100K on ads I didn't need." Most home service businesses don't have a lead problem. They have a visibility problem. And they're paying thousands a month to cover it up instead of fixing it. If your phone isn't ringing enough, DM me. I'll look at your setup for free and tell you exactly what's broken.

@robprogressive I pay tax on my vehicle, and VAT on its replacement parts, yet when I use it to travel to the supermarket THEY then charge me for the things that I take off their shelves!!!

If you go into central London, it costs you £15 congestion charge If you drop someone off at the airport, it costs you £7 drop off fee If you visit someone in hospital it’s £4/hr to park there If you go to a new city you get a toll, & if you stay 5 mins over you get a fine You literally can’t go anywhere in your car without being charged But you’ve already been taxed in your earnings, then taxed your car, so what’s going on with all these hidden costs?

@robprogressive These hidden costs are disgraceful. You should be made aware of them in some way before having to pay them

@WolfgangRichtEU @eurofounder Shocked to hear this. It's absolutely disgusting that your friend runs this brothel where people can pay varying amounts to have sex with farmyard animals. It's 2026 and yet the species pay gap is, quite literally, alive and kicking

@eurofounder Dear Matthias, In my municipality in Frankfurt a Moroccan friend is running an animal brothel. €4 per hour for goats and €6 for donkeys. Make sure your neighbor has all the licenses and does not take business from my friend. All the best, Wolfgang

Our neighbor plays loud music until 4am every night "Call the police" my wife said yesterday "Baby, take it easy, this man is a Moroccan refugee and he is still adjusting to European customs" I said "Refugee? There is no war in Morocco" "Wow, are you seriously that racist?" I shouted She didn't say another word and called her boyfriend She moved into his place to "get some sleep" Pretty weird, given that every time she comes back from his apartment she looks even more exhausted Meanwhile, noises from my neighbor intensified While this might sound shocking, I suspect he might be now having an intercourse with a goat Those Moroccan traditions are truly fascinating

@2147mill The same is also true of food, clothes, and transport. People spend huge proportions of their incomes on these frivolities when they could be investing and compounding the money instead.

Following on the rent vs buy debate: £300,000 house. → Mortgage interest: £12,000/year → Maintenance: £3,000/year → Insurance: £800/year → Stamp duty: £10,000 upfront → Total real cost: £25,000+ year one £300,000 in the Nasdaq instead. → Average 15% annual return = £45,000/year → No boiler breakdowns → No roof repairs → No estate agent fees when you sell Someone else fixes the boiler. Someone else pays the buildings insurance. Someone else handles the maintenance. Renting isn’t throwing money away IF your money is working hard elsewhere. Sometimes it’s the smartest trade in the room.

@theseoguy_ I tend to believe this is true, but Google isn't directly tracking whether you answer the phone or not. They see how quickly someone continues their search after calling you. That indicates whether you answered the phone or not

this is one of those theories that i cannot give you a peer reviewed study on but the people i trust most in local SEO are completely convinced it is real the theory is simple if someone finds your google business profile, clicks your phone number, and you don't answer google may be tracking that and if it happens enough, they demote you in the map pack rankings think about it from google's perspective their entire business model is built on giving users the best possible result if they send someone to your profile and that person can't get through to you, you just made google look bad google does not want to look bad i have no hard data to throw at you on this one and i want to be straight with you about that but the people telling me this are not random voices on the internet, they are people who have been doing this longer than me and have tested more than me the practical takeaway is straightforward answer your phone have someone answering your phone during business hours set up a system so calls don't go to voicemail in the middle of the day this costs you nothing to fix and the downside of ignoring it could be your rankings taking a hit in local SEO there are things you can prove and things you strongly suspect this one sits in the second category but it is worth taking seriously

@eurofounder Hearing about the comfort you received from Brunhilda as she nestled her beard on the back of your neck and pushed you firmly down into the mattress, is as good as any news of compliance success

Today I found out I have terminal cancer Five weeks ago I faxed a photo of a mosquito bite to the EU-certified AI model Today results came back "You have penis cancer. Terminal. 2 weeks to live" My wife looked at this and became suspicious "Cancer on your penis? Wasn't the bite on your arm?" She said we should see a real doctor "No doctor is better than the EU-regulated artificial intelligence..." I said quietly I told my wife I need space to process this Then I decided that a dying man deserves comfort Life is too short to die with regrets So I visited my neighbor Brunhilda and fucked her twice Goodbye, world. It was a beautiful life

@MichaelJCoffin @theseoguy_ 100%. I build systems like this all the time, mainly for my own business but also for clients when they twist my arm. I took over a website from a client because they were converting 1 in 15 leads. We got that to 1 in 4, mostly just by following up quickly with AI and humans

Does a nearly instant AI response help with this? We are looking at a system that can send an SMS, email or phone call basically immediately. It has access to our pricing and can gauge sentiment and escalate to humans in real time to pickup the sales process. Not sure if it’s worth it.

I have two clients in the same industry getting the same number of leads from Google every month. One is doing 3x the revenue of the other. The SEO is identical. The difference is what happens after someone fills out the form. Client one gets a form fill and someone on his team calls back within 4 minutes. Client two gets a form fill and calls back the next morning. The person who filled out that form at 2pm already hired someone by 9am the next day. This is the part of local SEO nobody talks about because it has nothing to do with rankings. You can be number 1 in Google and still lose every lead to the competitor sitting at number 3 if they pick up the phone faster than you do. Speed to lead is the most underrated variable in the entire equation. When someone searches for your service and fills out a form or calls, they are in buying mode at that exact moment. They are not browsing. They are not researching. They are ready to hire someone. That window does not stay open long. Studies show that the odds of actually reaching a lead drop by over 80% if you wait longer than 5 minutes to respond. Most business owners are waiting hours. Here is what the best operators I work with actually do. Every form fill triggers an immediate automated text to the lead. Something simple. Their name, what they are offering, and a direct ask to schedule a call. It goes out in under 60 seconds without a human involved. Then a real person follows up within minutes after that. By the time the competitor even sees the lead notification, this guy is already booked. Set this up whether you are running SEO, ads, or anything else. Go into whatever CRM or form tool you are using and build an immediate text automation for every new form submission. If you do not have a CRM, use something simple. The text just needs to go out fast and sound like a human wrote it. This single change will recover a meaningful percentage of the leads you are currently losing and never even knowing about. Your SEO is generating the opportunity. Do not let a slow follow-up be the reason it goes to waste.

@SuccessWithJake @irentdumpsters How do you know?

@irentdumpsters I like this play but investing in buying whole companies Ask me how I know

What if i started a little fund where i invest minority stakes into SMBs put a marketing team into your business built your backend tech stack and sales systems PUT our money right into your business what do you think would happen?~?

@irentdumpsters @ChrisHa93378389 I know a guy that is making progressively more millions doing exactly this

@MBplmbg @irentdumpsters Happy to give it a go. I've done some successful rev share deals with other clients

@irentdumpsters Any SEO experts that you know that would rev share with a existing plumbing company

"Google Ads work fine for us. We don't need SEO." A roofer told me this on a call last month. He's spending $100-$180 per click on Google Ads. Bidding against 23 other roofers for the same customer. 77% of his backlinks had zero authority. Site wasn't even indexed properly. His SEO company was sending him monthly reports showing "all green" on cherry-picked keywords THAT PEOPLE DO NOT EVEN SEARCH Meanwhile his competitor down the street gets 80 calls a month from the Map Pack and spends zero on ads. (we spoke to him a month ago) Who is going to have a better profit margin at the end of the year? The guy spending $25,000 a month to get ad calls or the guy spending $2,500?

@Hairy_Ballerina @2147mill So why don't they?

@2147mill Most would leave for nowt

Ngl I’d leave the UK for £40k too

@THArrowOfApollo CODE

We were Clay's largest user at one point in time, hitting their platform 17.3 million times per week. Last month we replaced them entirely with a $200/mo Claude Code subscription. I can't write code. Neither can James, my VP of Growth who built the replacement. Here's the full story. Clay is a GREAT product and I TRULY think most people should use it. But we hit their ceiling. 50,000 row limit per table. 12.5 million row cap per workspace. Tables that take days to actually delete. Clicking "run all" thousands of times and waiting days for things to clear out. So When you're processing millions of leads, all the above become the bottleneck of your entire business. James had never touched Claude Code before. Three weeks after learning it, he built our entire core system. With Clay, processing 1 million leads took 27 hours. And it would error out often enough that we would always have to plan on hitting the “run all rows” button again on 20+ clay tables. IYKYK but Our new system waterfall enriches 1 million leads in 5 seconds. 272,000 leads PER SECOND. AND On top of the core engine, we vibe coded a Google Maps scraper that pulls leads zip code by zip code across all 32,000 US zip codes. AND An AI lead finder that hits 95% contact match rates where Apollo gives you about 30%. AND Ad library scrapers for Google and LinkedIn. AND An AI campaign analysis system. AND An auto-refill system so clients never run out of leads mid-campaign. One we started building with Claude, we just couldn’t stop Now we have the data ready for clients sending 5 million emails a month within 1 week of signing the contract. I put together the full system blueprint -- every tool, the tech stack, a Clay vs custom comparison, and a 6-step playbook for building your own. Plus a video walkthrough where I show you the live system and how each tool actually works. Retweet or Reply CODE below and I'll DM it to you.

@fesshole What's the confession?

In my child's football team there is a cycling fundamentalist who refuses to go anywhere if he can't cycle. Fine, and very admirable. Except we all have to take it in turns to pick up his child for away games.

@Tim22282221 @richardhyland @AvonandsomerRob This is the best objection to EVs in the UK, imo. And will probably be the longest lasting. Without home charging, a lot of the benefit of owning the car is removed

@richardhyland @AvonandsomerRob How do I charge my car at home, when I have no off street parking?

With an Octopus Energy EV tariff, you can charge your car with 250 miles of range for £6, using cheap overnight rates of 7p/kwh. That's around 275 miles per gallon of petrol, equivalent. Why is there still a resistance to Electric Vehicles?