moist

@SpookyJoelder Traitor

Dune? I’d rather be Dune Whip-its In The Bathroom Before My Custody Hearing

@ZASpookshow 68 is rookie numbers. Pop it down to 65, or 61 if the hotel gods allow it. Really ride the lightning

It’s 2pm. I’m just waking up in a hotel room set to 68 degrees. Leprechaun 4: In Space just started on the Syfy channel. The comedy gods are good to me.

@JoeWGorman Oh no, joe what happened?

I love Chicago and I loooooooove acid.

@DeslippeW SODTAOE all day every day

S.O.D.T.A.O.E.

Taliban saw that Woodstock documentary and got frosty!

@beakieeeee @SpookyJoelder Dont be a dumb tattoo hater

Shout out to Gary Vee’s brother Larry Vee

Partner, I’m fixin, to be pissed

@BachnerBrian @mikerainey82 @timbutterly I'm pointing my knife at you right now but I guess that would be fair to say

@mikerainey82 Like an assommelier? @timbutterly

Went to a strip club for the 1st time in years on Friday and was utterly floored by the number of people working with buttplugs in. If you ask politely though, they’ll take it out and let you smell it like a booty cork.

Good afternoon friends hope you are all getting top on this beautiful day.

@ShesCrafty9 @AreYouGarbage @HFoleyOnIce @KevinRyanComedy The newport's, Busch light and change on the table remind me of home

@AreYouGarbage @HFoleyOnIce @KevinRyanComedy we watch you guys in our sunroom LOL. (I probably should have cleared out any discriminating evidence before taking a picture 😬)

Chet Hanks makes more sense when you realize he is the child of Forrest and Jenny.

Answering girls’ questions you’re welcome.

@AspersionCaster Hes a beautiful angel

"Dudes have the same psychosis. It's just caring too much about what you look like. It's horrible for girls because they're so beautiful the way they are." - Spud #WarMode Get that man a girlfriend to love

@KevinRyanComedy A true white trash Kennedy

New Money

@mikeabrusci Nice try but I'm still not giving you $300

Tell me your bank account and routing numbers without telling me your bank account and routing numbers

@Lot4Dub @luisjgomez @LegionOfSkanks Bill and spud on rap would rule

@luisjgomez @LegionOfSkanks Billie and Spud from WARMODE. Maybe test run them on RAP

Who is the one comedian you would like to see on @LegionOfSkanks that hasn’t been on yet?

@mikerecine They looked good Mike and that dressing looked even better

Ok a lot of people on Instagram are talking shit about my boneless wings

If the Chiefs win tonight, I will fist fight my boss. I will also do this if the Bucs win