Average Database CEO

Ohh husbant... You founded a database company and sell each database for less than it costs to run it... Now we are homeless

@PriyanshuG20248 Spend my time blocking people who use AI replies

@AvgDatabaseCEO The real flex isn't the raise it's not needing it. Most founders optimize for the press release, not the cap table. Curious what you'd do differently in hindsight with the dilution?

Looking back, we probably should have raised less in our series A. I vastly underestimated how quickly we would become profitable and how little I’d need to pay engineers to get there. Now we have too much sitting in the bank, just collecting interest.

If today’s Neon Postgres outage hurt your business. DM me for free AvgDB credits. My CTO will personally help you get your app back online.

@shahaayush1999 @BenjDicken No, PG sucks at handling connections. Not sure why anyone uses it. Legacy database

@BenjDicken Are these same limitations applicable to MySQL / SQLite or just PG

This is why you avoid direct connections to Postgres. Benchmarked PG running on a r8g.2xlarge (8 vCPU + 64GB ram) with connections ranging from 8 → 2048. Clearly a sweet spot at 64 with degrading perf thereafter. Apps often need 1000s of connections. Scale with a proxy!

@database_comedy @samlambert As a child model I cannot relate to this difficulty other CEOs might have.

@samlambert @AvgDatabaseCEO shots fired

I maintain the position that CEOs who constantly have a camera in their faces are probably not getting much real work done.

@DaLoneModerate I’d guess most don’t put in a credit card and fall off.

@AvgDatabaseCEO 12k paid users a day? Must be a catch. I like Jake but if that's the case there should be a lot more people talking about it here. Could be some smart partnerships or something

Neon guy: “imagine 2026 without a free plan” Railway guy: “These are all paid signups” ABSOLUTELY MOGGED

@BenjDicken Thank you

@BenjDicken Make my ball faster than the other ball. Add flames too. The cool kind, like it’s fast.

Benchmarking Postgres this week. What's on your wish list? I'm particularly interested in: - jit on/off - autovacuum tuning and pg_squeeze - Conn scaling (both with and w/o PgBouncer) - Comparing performance across versions 12-18 - General perf tuning

my son texted me from a party “do we still have pizza at home?” we don’t that’s the code His friend’s dad is a YC founder on Neon Postgres and his database is down. Grabbing my CTO and heading to the party now.

@mgonto @andyhattemer @theHankTaylor @cynthiamcgillis Don’t worry, Neon is only 1 degree of separation from the drama.

@andyhattemer @theHankTaylor @cynthiamcgillis but @AvgDatabaseCEO still has an opinion 🤣.

@mattyp Ya I’m so cool I don’t buy your love with hats 😘

sam is definitely not @AvgDatabaseCEO btw

IOPS @samlambert

@swyxio I’m not observing the industry here. I know and have worked with people involved with it.

Sorry kids, daddy is so upset by a github fork he’s spending the afternoon writing a Twitter blog about it. I used to really like Vercel. But why must their ceo and cto be so damn sensitive.

A guide on how to cause the Vercel executive team to crash out

@WebReflection I think vercels success is not because of his leadership. It’s more a credit to their engineers accomplishing so much in spite of his negative leadership.

@WebReflection I don’t think malte deserves any credit here. People in leadership positions need to be held to higher standards. At the very least I’d expect the emotional maturity to not post this.

both Malte and a few folks I know at Cloudflare are exceptionally skilled people, beside also being lovely, sad to wake up and read this story. my hope is that both sides will find a way to be more collaborative in the future, great projects, ideas, developers should get along.

@threepointone You’re a hero

hey you, uh, thanks for being so nice. I appreciate it. I find a lot of validation from work and mad sciencing and getting cool technology leverage into people's hands, and I was so worried I'd fucked up bad. y'all showing up for me is giving me the weeps. I'm very grateful.

@zeeg Only if you promise to crash out and write a twitter blog post about it after

can someone fork sentry and go fix all our bugs ty

@EliotGevers The author addressed this in the replies.

@AvgDatabaseCEO Ok great. Educate me on how Cloudflare forking this is better, instead of making upstreaming contributions. While making it less secure, claiming it has extra features that just-bash already had (probably llm hallucination as mentioned)?

@EliotGevers Eliot, buddy. I say this because you are very young and it’s not your fault. This is something you do not understand yet. Read and learn. You accomplish nothing by sending gifs to me.

@AvgDatabaseCEO I was talking about you, totally ignoring the fact that the fork is less secure and passed on as "complete"